Hamburger Jokes.

After
the first hamburger press was invented and became successful,
the inventor was given a patty on the back.

Did
you hear about the waiter who was 6'8" tall? He handled
all the tall orders.

Q.
What do they serve for lunch at the comedian workshop?

A. Hamburger puns.

Long
lines at the fast food counter cause wait gain.

Did
you hear about the new drive-thru restaurant for golfers?
They insist upon putting greens on all their courses!

Sorry,
I meant to serve you a plain burger. No bun intended...

– Some Cheesy Stand-Up Comedian.

Q.
Where do people who have eaten too many Big Macs go in the
afterlife?

A. Burger-tory.

The
harried hamburger chef was so worried about the grill, that
he put everything else on the back burner.

Q.
What did the hungry computer eat for lunch?

A. Chips, one byte at a time.

Q.
Why was the hamburger thrown out of the army?

A. Because he couldn't pass the mustard.

Q.
Who wrote the book, Deadly Great Hamburgers?

A. E. Cole Aye.

Q.
How is working in a hamburger joint like being an archeaologist
in Athens?

A. At the end of the day, you end up smelling like ancient
grease.

Q.
What does an agreeable pickle usually say to a burger?

A. I relish the idea!

Q.
What do you call people who post particularly funny pickle
puns?

A. Dilly Silly!

Q.
Which kind of convenince store sells both gasoline and hamburgers?

A. A grilling station.

Q.
How can a hamburger run the mile in under four minutes?

A. Because it's fast food!

Q.
Which day of the week do hamburgers like least?

A. Fry Day.

Q.
What does the Air Force call a large formatin of MAC aircraft
heaed toward a target?

A. A Big Mac attack.

Q.
Why do the Hamburgers beat the Hot Dogs at every sport they
play?

A. Because Hot Dogs are the wurst!

Q.
Which song do hamburgers sing on the job?

A. Gristle While You Work.

Did
you hear about the hamburger comedian who told really funny
jokes? He was really on a roll!

Q.
Where does a hamburger feel right at home?

A. On the Range!

Q.
Can you count on a hamburger in an emergency?

A. Yes, when the chips are down.

If
a burger joint waiter does not succeed at first, he must
tray, tray, tray again!

Q.
Which cheeseburger always makes a big hit in baseball?

A. A Double.

Q.
Why was the pig hired at the restaurant?

A. He was good at bacon burgers.

Q.
How can you stop somebody from stealing food off your grill?

A. With a burger alarm!

Q.
Which patty really likes to over act?

A. Ham-Burger!

Q.
Why was the hamburger so sad?

A. Because it had blue cheese!

Q.
Which kind of humor leaves a hamburger cold?

A. Biting wit and gnawing puns!

Q.
What do you call a claim that a guy could eat a Big Mac
and a Whopper in just two bites?

A. Hard to swallow.

Q.
What do you call restrooms in a seafood-themed burger joint?

A. Buoys and Gulls Rooms

Q.
Which hamburger can see into your future?

A. A Medium.

Q.
What do fry cooks call customers who request Swiss, muenster,
or mozzarella instead of American?

A. Cheese beggars.

A
cheeseburger walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Okay,
but don't tell any cheesy jokes."

Big
Mac walks into a bar. He says, "Ouch!"

Burger
Joint Point to Ponder: Is a short order cook just a flash
in the pan?