Q. What do you call an illusionist goldfish that does tricks in its bowl?
A. A magic carpet.

Q. Which fancy tropical fish isn't quite ready for prime time release?
A. The Beta.

Q. Which aquarium resident wears leather and rides a hog?
A. The Hell's Angelfish.

Q. Which tropical fish are the most loving tank residents?
A. Kissing Fish.

Q. Which type of tropical fish has his own built-in weapon?
A. The Swordtail.

Q. Which tropical fish officiates at tank sporting events?
A. The Zebra Fish.

Q. Which aquarium fish never has to wear a special hat to protect itself from alien mind control?
A. A Tinfoil Barb.

Q. Which tropical fish is GRReat?
A. Tony, the Tiger Barb.

Q. How do you describe a fancy male Beta who wears an ascot?
A. So fish-ticated!

Q. Which chubby little tropical fish is always out of breath?
A. The Puffer Fish.

Q. What's the name of the city aquarium's social network?
A. Fishbook!

Q. Why do zippy Zebra fish like to swim in schools?
A. Because they're good at gym class.

Q. Why did the modest koi fish in the garden pond blush?
A. Because it saw Lily Pads's bottom!

Fish Tank Point to Ponder: If you cal a plecostomus a sucker, is that a slur or a compliment?

Q. Which red tropical fish is the best dressed?
A. The swordtail, because they always look sharp!

Truly Koi Pick-Up Line: Hey Goldie, tonight I'd like to take a dip in your pond.

Q. Why did the fancy guppy want to go to Hollywood?
A. He hoped to see his favorite starfish!

Fishbowl Pick-Up Line: Hey there Big Finn. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swim by again?

Q. Where do industrious pet guppies work to make a living?
A. Out of their home offish.

Q. Which blue and purple cichlid fish is a noted pugilist?
A. The Jack Dempsey.

Q. What is it called when your new fish hides behind a rock in your backyard pond?
A. Just being koi.

Finny Fish Tank Hookup Line: Hey Wanda, wanna come over and help me remove my algae?

Q. Which resident of the 55-gallon tank won an Academy Award?
A. The Oscar Fish.

Q. Which mellow livebearing tropical fish has a dark side?
A. The Black Molly.

Q. Why wouldn't the school of Neon Tetraa go near the bottom of the tank?
A. 'Cause there's a big scary catfish there!

Fishy Fish Tank Pick-Up Line: Hey Gill, where you fin my whole life?

Q. What did the sign at the outlet pet store say to advertise free low quality aquariums?
A. Tanks for Nothing.

Clownfish Pick-Up Line: Hey Goldie, wanna come home with me to see my catfish?

Q. How does a little seahorse get around in the big salt water tank?
A. He scallops.

Kissing Fish Hookup Line: Hey Molly, if you were a fish tank, I would tap that!

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