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Q. Why did the volcano explode? A. It couldn't find a lava-tory!
Q. Why doesn't cheddar like to party with crackers? Someone always cuts the cheese...
Q. How are men like laxatives? A. Both can irritate the sh*t out of you!
Happy Toots Day!
Q. What do you call a fairy using the toilet? A. Stinker Bell!

 


Toilet Humor, Flatulence Jokes, Crappy Puns
Hold your nose for gassy stinkers, ripping funny puns, fart jokes and smelly bathroom humor.

Fart Jokes, Stinking Funny Puns, Gassy Humor
(Because Breaking Wind Jokes Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream, Butt Flatulent Puns Are Just for Farting Around!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Malodorous jokes, gas attack humor, and stinking funny fart puns ahead.
| Fart Jokes and Funny Flatulence | Sewer Humor | Superhero Loo | 2 | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes |
| Toilet Jokes | 2 | Toilet Paper Jokes and TP Puns | Urine Jokes, Pee Puns, #1 Humor |
| Turd Jokes and Crap Puns | 2 | Constipation Jokes and Proctologist Puns | Diarrhea Jokes |
| Animal Poop Puns | Fertilizer Jokes, Garden Manure Humor, and Crappy Gnome Puns |
| Bathroom Jokes, Toilet Humor, Potty Puns, Crappy Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

Q. What do you call a guy who never farts in public? A. A Private Tutor!Q. How can you tell if a woman is wearing panty hose? A. If she farts, her ankles swell up!Q. What did the poo say to the fart? A. You glow me away!

When people hug you, fart really loudly. You'll make them feel very strong!

Q. Why are men's farts louder than lady farts?
A. Because men have a microphone and two speakers.

Why fart and waste, when you can burp and taste?

Q. Why did the punster resist the urge to tell a fart joke?
A. Because it would stink.

Gassy Point to Ponder: If you fart while traveling at the speed of light, would you smell it before you heard it?

Q. What do paleontologists call dinosaur farts?
A. A blast from the past.

Q. What do you call farts caused by eating refried beans along with onions?
A. Tear Gas!

Q. What do you call a cat who likes to eat beans?
A. Puss 'n Toots.

I farted at work today. They called in the plumbers to look for a leak in the sewage system.

Q. Why did the standup comedian stop telling fart jokes?
A. Because everybody said they stink!

Q. What should you say after farting loudly in a public restroom?
A. Systems check cleared, ready for drop!

Q. Why do farts smell?
A. For the benefit of the hearing impared.

A belch is just a gust of wind that comes from the heart, but when it takes the downward trend, it turns into a fart!Q. What is the definition of surprise? A. A fart with a lump in it!Q. Why don't single women fart? A. Because they don't have ass holes until they're married!

Q. Why are Ninja farts so dangerous?
A. Because they are silent, yet deadly!

Q. Why do cherry trees stink?
A. Because George Washington cut one!

Q. Why do comedians in Colorado tell brief fart jokes?
A. Because the air is thinner up there.

Flatulent Point to Ponder: Do clown farts smell funny? EW!

Q. What is the first rule of scuba diving?
A. Never fart inside your wet suit!

Q. What is the sharpest thing in the world?
A. A Fart. It goes through your pants and doesn't even leave a hole.

Q. How do you know if a fart was really bad?
A. The EPA cited it for an air polution violation.

Q. What do you call a teacher who only farts in front of students?
A. A private tooter.

Q. Why don't skeletons ever fart in front of others?
A. Because they don't have the guts.

Q. Why shouldn't you ever fart on an elevator?
A. Because it's so wrong, on so many levels!

Gassy Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, somebody farted, so lets get out of here, NOW!

Q. What did the maxi pad say to the fart?
A. You're the wind beneath my wings.

Q. Why shouldn't you ever fart in church?
A. Because you have to sit in your pew!

Q. What did the little turd say to the big fart?
A. Wow, you just blew me away!

Q. Why do horses fart when they buck? A. Because they can't acheive full horse power without gas!Chimp Asks: Why do farts stink? A. So deaf people can enjoy them, too!Stinky Pun: Hey, did you fart? 'Cause you just BLEW me away!

Q. Why don't comedians in Colorado tell brief fart jokes?
A. Because they wear boxers.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. Because the rooster farted.

Why do I fart? Because it's the only gas I can afford!

Q. How does a fart refer to the love of his brief life?
A. Poopsie.

Q. What is the difference between Mozart and methane?
A. One is music to your ears and the other is music from the rear.

If a king farts, is it a noble gas?

Flatuent Point to Ponder: If people talk about you behind you back, is that the same as a fart?

Crappy Point to Ponder: If pooping is the call of nature, then is a fart a missed call?

Bathroom Pick-Up Line: My love for you is just like a fart. I just can't hold it in.

Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it's probably sh*t!

Q. Why did the constipated leprechaun go to the doctor?
A. He could only fart rainbows.

I was out delivering leaflets today. Unfortunately, I let one rip...

Q. What do Whovians call a stinky fart of unknown origin? A. Silence, but deadly!Children are like farts. Your own are bearable, but everyone else's are absolutely horrendous!Q. What do you call a smelly Santa Claus? A. Farter Christmas!

Q. How can you tell if your aquarium has extra bubbles because your clown fish just farted?
A. It smells funny.

Q. What happens if you pull on Mr. Data's index finger?
A. He expels hydraulic pressure through a usually unnoticed orifice of his anatomy.

Q. What did Flatulence of Borg say before assimilating his victims?
A. Prepare to pull my finger.

Q. What is a fart?
A. The lonely cry of an abandoned turd.

Q. What did one butt cheek say to the other?
A. Oh gosh, that horrible smell is coming from the corridor.

Q. What do you call a guy who only farts in front of associates?
A. A private tooter.

Q. What does a bruin's fart smell like in the woods?
A. It's absolutely un-bearable!

Q. How are children just like farts?
A. Your own are bearable, but everybody else's are real stinkers.

Q. Why don't farts graduate from high school?
A. Because they always end up getting expelled!

Q. What should you say after farting loudly in a public restroom?
A. Pardon me, I need to get that fixed.

Q. What do you call a TV episode that's dedicated to past flatulence?
A. A gassy montage.

A man accidentally farts loudly at a party. Another man growls, "How dare you fart before my sister!" The farter replies, "Sorry, I didn't know it was her turn."

Who else is glad that Tootsday and Turdsday are two days apart?

Q. After eating chili, how do you know it's really cold outside?
A. You just farted a trail of snowflakes.

I would make a fart joke, but I'm afraid it would stink!

Q. Why don't skeletons ever fart in front of others?
A. Because they don't have the guts.

Q. What did the poop say to the fart?
A. Wow, you just blew me away! ??

I farted at work today. They called in the plumbers to look for a leak in the sewage system. ??

Q. Why do Denver Broncos fart?
A. Because they can't acheive full horse power without gas!

| Fart Jokes and Funny Flatulence | Sewer Humor | Superhero Loo | 2 | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes |
| Toilet Jokes | 2 | Toilet Paper Jokes and TP Puns | Urine Jokes, Pee Puns, #1 Humor |
| Turd Jokes and Crap Puns | 2 | Constipation Jokes and Proctologist Puns | Diarrhea Jokes |
| Animal Poop Puns | Fertilizer Jokes, Garden Manure Humor, and Crappy Gnome Puns |
| Bathroom Jokes, Toilet Humor, Potty Puns, Crappy Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

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