Which kind of horse really enjoys baked beans?
A. The Pinto.
What happened after a horse swallowed four quarters?
A. It bucked.
What kind of bakery does a horse like?
When does a horse talk?
A. Whinny wants to!
Hookup Line: Hay lady,
you're a fine little filly. I'm a purebred myself, so you
wanna go for a quick trot?
What do you call a cheap guy who owns small horses but doesn't
spend much money on them?
A. A pony-pincher.
Which famous Italian friar and philosopher was actually
a great horseman?
A. St. Thomas Equinas.
What is a stable diet?
Why did the jockey quit his job?
A. He wanted a change of pace.
What do you call a donkey with a banjo?
What do you call a bar fight with donkeys?
A. Whoop ass.
What do donkeys send out at Christmas time?
A. Mule-tide greetings.
What do you call it when you drop the little donkey you
were carrying because Painful Puns cracked you
up so much?
A. Laughing your ass off.
Horse Pick-Up Line: Hay
there big fella, if I ran a race with you, I'd let you come
first every time!
What is it called when donkeys party loudly?
Which award was presented to the journalist who broke the
story about asses that genetically modify donkeys?
A. The Mule It Surprise.
How many animals can fit into a pair of pantyhose?
A. Ten little piggies, two calves, one ass, one beaver and
several thousand hares.
Who helps the horse stable cleaning guy?
A. His co-pile-it!
What do you call a noisy horse?
A. A herd animal!
Pick-Up Line: Hey Mare,
I'd love to foal-fill all of your needs tonight.
What's the difference between a horse and the weather?
A. One is reined up, and the other rains down.
What do horses see before they hear thunder?
A. A lightning colt.
Horsing around: Horses do not love the idea of being urged
to go faster because it's spur of the moment.
What do you call a race horse that wins a lot money for
A. A thorough bread winner.
What do you call a horse that has sold almost all of its
A. A a one truck pony.
Pick-Up Line: Hey baby,
I have got a major horn on for y