Q. Which part of math does a cow enjoy most? A. Mootiplication!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

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Bull asks: Did you hear about the guy who died eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull dragged him more than a mile!
Q. Why was the cow afraid? A. She was a cow-herd!
Flying Cow Says: Happy Moon Day!


Cow Jokes, Udder Cover Humor, Cow Puns
Have you herd the latest cud-ding edge humor, sacred cow comedy, and udder laughter?

Cow Humor, Udderly Funny Puns, Cow Jokes
(Because City Cow Jokes and Smoggy Bull Puns Are TOO Mainstream for LOL Livestock and Comedian Cows!)
Warning: Bum Steers Present. Watch Where You Walk! The odor isn't the most painful manure ahead.
| Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cow On the Moon | Bull Puns | Cowboy Jokes | Dairy Farm Humor |
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Q. When is rancher like a magician? A. When he turns a cow into a pasture!Cow Pun - Pasteurize: Too Far Too SeeQ. What do you call an evil cow? A. De-moon-ic!

Q. Why was it so hard to brush the heifer's hair?
A. She had a bad cow lick!

Q. What do you get from dairy farms in Alaska?
A. Ice cream.

Q. What kind of car does a Texas cattle baron's champion bull drive?
A. A Cattle-ac.

Q. What does a Colorado rancher call bad directions from a cow?
A. A bum steer.

Q. What happens when you talk to a cow?
A. It goes in one ear and out the udder.

Q. What did the cow say to the silo?
A. Hay, is my fodder in there?

Q. What do cattle drive when the car is broken?
A. A COWasaki MOOtorcycle.

Q. What happens when a cow stops shaving?
A. She grows a moostache.

Q. What is a metaphor?
A. For grazin' yer cattle.

Q. What do you get if you cross an angry sheep with a moody cow?
A. An animal in a really baad moood!

Q. Where do suicidal cows go for lunch?
A. McDonald's.

Q. What do cows like to use when they send texts?
A. E-moo-jis.

Q. How does a Wall Street broker define laughing stock?
A. Cattle with a sense of humor.

Q. What did the secret agent cow ask the other cow? A. Are you udder cover?Q. What do you call a cow on the barnyard floor? A. Ground beef!Q. What do you call a cow who gives no milk? A. A Bum Steer

Q. Why did the cow cross the road?
A. To get to the udder side.

Q. Which band is a cow's favorite?
A. The Moo-dy Blues.

Q. What do you get when a farmer feeds cows money?
A. Farm rich milk.

Q. Which publication causes a monthly stampede to the moos stand?
A. Cosmoopolitan magazine.

I don't eat steak often, so when I do, it's a rare occasion.

S-A-L-A-D: That's a funny way to spell STEAK!

Q. Why can't cows pilot boats?
A. Because they can't steer their udder.

Q. How does a farmer count a herd of cows?
A. with a Cow-culator.

Q. What do you call a magician cow?
A. Moo-dini.

Please stop the cow puns? I'm calving nightmares!Q. What is a cow's favorite kind of cookie? A. Moolasses!Q. Which subjects do cows excel at in school? A. Moosic, psycowlogy and cowculus!

Q. What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving?
A. Real men eat beef!

Bovine Point to Ponder: If a cow laughs really hard, could milk come out her nose?

Did you hear about the blonde who died with a bow and arrow in her hands? Apparently, she hit the bull's eye.

Q. Where do cows go for a night out?
A. To the moo-vies.

Q. What game do cows play at parties?
A. Moo-sical Chairs.

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a goat?
A. A Coat.

Q. In which school subjects might the teacher say: Well Done, Steaks?
A. Meatyeval History and Meat-thematics.

Q. Why are cows so good at math?
A. They love to cow-nt.

Q. What is the golden rule for cows?
A. Do unto udders as you would have udder do to you.

Q. What was the name of the cow knight? A. Sir Loin!Q. Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain? A. He's got no beef!Q. How did the cow get to Mars? A. It flew through udder space!

Q. What does a good beef steak have in common with sex?
A. They're both very rare.

Q. How easy is it to milk a cow?
A. It's a piece of steak?

Q. Where does a steer carry his stock market report?
A. In his beef case.

Q. How can you tell if steaks have a high I.Q.?
A. They loin fast.

Q. Why were the Wyoming rancher's stock so skittish?
A. Because they were cow herds.

I wanted to take home the leftovers from the BBQ, but somebody else foiled my plans.

Q. What sound does it make when a cow breaks the sound barrier?
A. Cow Boom!

Did you hear about the guy who died eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull must have dragged him a mile! Yes, the bull was really quite testy.

Q. Where do milkshakes come from?
A. Nervous cows.

| Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cow On Moon | Bull Puns | Beefy Humor | Ranch Puns, Cowboy Jokes |
| Farm Crime LOLs and Cow Cop Jokes | Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns | Farm Music Jokes |
| Horse Jokes, Pony Puns | 2 | 3 | Donkey Jokes, Ass Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns |
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| Farm Jokes and Farm Animal Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Farm Pick-Up Lines |

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You've moo-sied along this far, so here's even more moo-valous humor,
grass-fed jokes, and pasture prime painful puns that udderly delight:

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