Please stop the cow puns? I'm calving nightmares! - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

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Q. Which job is a cow best suited for? A. Baker, because they refularly make cow pies!
Q. Why don't cows have any money? A. Because farmers milk them dry!
Q. Where did the bull lose all his money? A. At teh cowsino!
Q. What do you get if you cross a chicken and a cow? A. Roost Beef!


Cattle Jokes, Punny Cow Humor, Beefy Laughs
Rustle up to laugh-a-bull cattle jokes, hilarious herd mentality humor, and funny bull sh*t!

Cow Jokes, Over Heard Humor, Cow Puns
('Cause Urban Cowboy Puns and Beefy Puns Are Far TOO Mainstream for Cool Country Cows and Hipster Herds!)
Warning: Bull Sh*t Present. Watch Where You Walk! The smell of the bull crap isn't the most painful thing ahead!
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Q. What do you call a cow who gives no milk? A. A BullQ. Why did the cow jump over the moon? A. Because the farmer had cold hands!NASA just put a bunch of Holsteins into low earth orbit. Missioin name: The Herd Shot 'Round the World

Q. What do you call a bull who gives no milk?
A. Really pissed off.

The new neighbor walked up to the dairy farmer with a jug of milk saying, "I just milked your cow." The astounded farmer replied, "Um, that's a bull!"

Q. Why doesn't Sweden export cattle?
A. Because they want to keep their Stockholm!

Q. Is it proper to eat a BBQ ribs with your fingers?
A. No, fingers should be eaten separately!

Q. Why don't vampires bother dairy cattle?
A. Because they just cownt.

Q. Why did the farmer put brandy in the cows' feed?
A. He wanted to raise stewed beef.

Q. What are the spots on black and white cows?
A. Hol-stains.

Q. Where do cows like to go on holiday?
A. Moo Zealand.

Q. What do you get if you cross a rooster and a cow?
A. Cock-a-doodle-moo!

Q. What do you call cattle that tell jokes? A. Laughing stock!Cow Pun: A man assaulted me with milk, cream, and butter. How Dairy!Q. Where do cows get together? A. At the meet market!

Q. What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A. Laughing Stock!

Q. Which kind of humor leaves a beef steak cold?
A. Biting wit and gnawing puns!

Q. What do you get if you cross a cow and a porcupine?
A. Steak with built-in toothpicks.

Q. What do cows wear in Hawaii?
A. Moo-moos.

Q. Which kind of cows are found in Alaska?
A. Eski-moos.

Q. Why did this cow jump over the moon?
A. The farmer had cold hands.

Q. How easy is it to milk a cow?
A. Well, it's no piece of steak!

Dear Beef, Hot coals are red, gas flames are blue, but when it comes to meat, all I want is you.

Q. Why are cows so soft?
A. Because they're made out of leather.

Q. What do you call a bull wearing a suit of armor?
A. Sir Loin.

Q. What do you get if you give pasta to a cow? A. Beefaroni!Q. What is a cow's favorite musical note? A. Beef Flat!Q. What do you call it when one bull spies on another? A. A steak out!

Q. Where does a beef burger feel right at home?
A. On the Range!

Q. Why did the blonde throw her doll on the grill?
A. She heard it was a Barbie-que.

Q. What does a cow chef use to rinse produce and pasta?
A. Her cowlander.

Q. What do you call a bull that pleasures himself?
A. Beef-Strokin'-Off!

Did you know that cows are vegetarians so that you don't have to be?

Q. Which USA holiday is by far the favorite of cows?
A. Moomorial Day.

Today's bull sh*t point to ponder:
Is an argument between two vegans still called a beef?

Q. What is a great name for a prize-winning steer?
A. Chuck.

Q. What do you call a cattle herd that's masturbating?
A. Beef Strokin' Off.

Why did the cow go into the spaceship? She wanted to see the Moooooon!Cow Joke: Old milk maids never die, they just lose their whey.Q. Why did the cow jump over the moon? A. Because she saw Uranus!

Q. Where do Russians get their milk?
A. From Mos-cows!

Q. Where do cows like to ride on trains?
A. In the cow-boose!

Q. Which farm animals do you always take to be with you?
A. Your calves!

Q. Why does a milking stool only have three legs?
A. Because the cow has the udder.

Q. What is it called when cows get sick?
A. Hay Fever.

Q. What did the cow landlord say when she evicted the broke donkey?
A. Moove your fat ass outta here!

Q. What did the cow say when she heard somebody playing the guitar?
A. That's udderly good moo-sic!

Q. What is the most common use for cowhide?
A. Holding cows together!

Q. What do you call a cow that stepped on a land mine?
A. Well done.

| Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cow On Moon | Bull Puns | Beefy Humor | Ranch Puns, Cowboy Jokes |
| Farm Crime LOLs and Cow Cop Jokes | Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns | Farm Music Jokes |
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| Farm Jokes and Farm Animal Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Farm Pick-Up Lines |

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You've dogie-d along this far, so here's even more laughing stock humor,
bull-sh*t jokes, and well-done painful puns – just for some chuckles

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