Q. Which farm animal turns into a superhero at night? A. This sheep is Baaman!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Farm Humor, Clucking Funny Jokes!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For the honor of all chickens! – Mr Worf

Q. What do you get if you cross a chicken and a centipede? A. Drumsticks for a crowd!
Q. What was the name of the cow knight? A. Sir Loin!

 


Stinking Funny Farm Jokes & Down Home Humor
Get a whiff of down home humor, stinking funny farmer puns, and rural jokes – no bull!

Farmer Humor, Cow Puns, On the Farm Jokes
(Because Subway Jokes and Smog Puns Are Far TOO Mainstream for Cool Cows and Farmers Named Chuck!)
Warning: Farm Animals Roaming Freely. Watch Where You Walk! The odor isn't the most painful thing ahead.
| Farm Jokes and Farm Animal Puns | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Animal Pick-Up Lines |
| Funky Chicken Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Beefy Humor | 2 |
| Farmer Jokes | Cowboy Jokes | Goose Jokes, Duck Puns | Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns |
| Horse Jokes | 2 | 3 | Donkey Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns | Wild Animal Jokes |
| Animal Music Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Pet Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Xmas Animal Puns |

Q. Why do horses fart when they buck? A. Because they can't acheive full horse power without gas!Please stop the cow puns? I'm calving nightmares!Q. Which sport was invented by pigs? A. Mud Wrestling!

Q. Why is horse racing so romantic?
A. Because the horse hugs the rail, the jockey puts his arms around the horse, and you kiss your money goodbye!

Q. What sickness can a cowboy get from riding a wild horse?
A. Bronchitis!

Q. What kind of bakery does a horse like?
A. Thoroughbread.

Q. Why was the horse naked?
A. Because his jockey fell off.

Q. What is the worst thing you can call a cow?
A. A MOOron.

Q. What did the turkey say on Thanksgiving?
A. Real men eat beef!

Did you hear about the blonde who died with a bow and arrow in her hands? Apparently, she hit the bull's eye.

Q. How do you get a cow to be quiet?
A. Press the moot button.

Q. What did the pig say when a wolf grabbed his tail?
A. "That's the end of me!"

Wanna hear a clean swine joke? Two pigs took a bath together...

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A. A slow pork!

Q. What did the farmer get when he crossed a pig and a gourd?
A. A Plumpkin.

Why did the cow go into the spaceship? She wanted to see the Moooooon!Q. What's the difference between a dressmaker and a farmer? A dressmaker sews what she gathers and a farmer gathers what he sows!Q. What do you call it when one bull spies on another? A. A steak out!

The first animal in space was not a monkey. Everybody knows the cow already jumped over the moon!

Q. Why did the another cow go to the dark side of the moon?
A. Because she went Goth.

Q. What sound does it make when a cow breaks the sound barrier?
A. Cow Boom!

Q. Where do cows like to go on holiday?
A. Moo Zealand.

Q. Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar?
A. He wanted sweet and sour pork.

Q. Where do farmers send their young children for early learning growth?
A. Kinder-garden!

Texas Farm House Point to Ponder: If it feels chili inside, should you turnip the heat?

Q. What did the strawberry plant say to the farmer?
A. Stop picking on me!

Today's bull sh*t point to ponder:
Is an argument between two vegans still called a beef?

Q. What do you call a cow that perfectly blends into her surroundings?
A. Camooflaged.

Q. What is a great name for a prize-winning steer?
A. Chuck.

Q. Where do cattle stay when they're on vacation or a steak-out?
A. At a mootel.

Q. Why did the chicken join a band? A. Because it already had drumsticks!Q. What is a horse's favorite sport? A. Stable Tennis!Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a centipede? A. Bacon and Legs!

Q. Why did Mozart fry all his chickens?
A. Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they all said: "Bach, Bach, Bach."

Q. Why did the rooster get a tattoo?
A. To impress old chicks 25 years from now.

Q. Why did the chicken just jump into the soup pot?
A. The farmer's wife told her it was a Jacuzzi.

Q. What do you get if you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
A. The Cluck of the Irish!

Q. Why are most horses in such great shape?
A. Because they eat a stable diet.

Q. What do you call the condition Denver Broncos fans get from cheering too hard?
A. Bronchitis!

Q. Why did the owners name the hot new race horse Bad News?
A. Because Bad News travels fast!

Q. Why did the naive city boy stand behind the horse?
A. He thought he'd get a kick out of it.

Q. What do pigs put on pancakes?
A. Hog Cabin Syrup!

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a billy goat?
A. A crashing boar.

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a tortoise?
A. A slow pork!

Q. What do you call a swine demolition derby?
A. Crashing boars!

Sheep Says to a Leopard: Caturday is not for the meek!Q. Why did the farmer stand on top of a grain-separating machine? A. He wanted to get a thresh perspective!Q. What do you call a rude Canada goose in Colorado? A. One? Are you freaking serious?

Q. What did one sheep say to another?
A. I love ewe!

Q. Where do sheep go on vacation?
A. The Baahaamaas.

Q. What do you call a sheep with no head and no legs?
A. A cloud.

Q. What does every overly ambitious sheep want?
A. To wool the world.

Q. Why was the lamb arrested on the freeway?
A. Because she did a ewe turn.

Q. What did the pig do after the farmer said, "Hogwash?"
A. Took a bath.

Q. How are some farmers cruel?
A. They pull corn by the ears!

Q. Why did the farmer plow his field with a steam roller?
A. He wanted mashed potatoes.

Q. How did the farmer find his lost cow?
A. He tractor down.

Grain farmers have a tough life. They barley survive wheat to wheat.

Pick Up a Farmer Line: Hey big fella, you are one fine piece of acreage.

Q. What did the goose say when it was cold?
A. Brrrd!

Q. Where do bird royalty live?
A. At Duckingham Palace.

Q. What do you get if you cross a chicken and a duck?
A. A bird that lays down!

Q. What do ducks and geese like about the great outdoors?
A. Debris!

Q. What does a water fowl farmer call an escaped bird?
A. A Loose Goose!

| Farm Jokes and Farm Animal Puns | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Animal Pick-Up Lines |
| Funky Chicken Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Cow Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Beefy Humor | 2 |
| Farmer Jokes | Cowboy Jokes | Goose Jokes, Duck Puns | Pig Jokes | 2 | 3 | Baad Sheep Puns |
| Horse Jokes | 2 | 3 | Donkey Puns | Broncos Jokes | Animal Poop Puns | Wild Animal Jokes |
| Animal Music Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Pet Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Xmas Animal Puns |


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You've wallowed along this far, so here's even more down home humor,
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| Sports Jokes | Superman Jokes | Travel Puns | Veggie Jokes | Weather Jokes | Weed Jokes | Winter Jokes |

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