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Q. What do you get if you cross a thought with a light bulb? A. A bright idea!
Do you ever want to just take off your glasses because you're tired of seeing things?
Q. What do you all an unmarried guy with the worst handwriting? A. The most illegible bachelor!
Martini says: I was drinking at the bar, so I thook the bus home. Problem is, I've never driven a bus before!
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Q. What do you call the ability to see a hundred years into the future? A. Extra-Century Perception!
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You might be from Colorado if you've gone off-roading in a vehicle that wasn't intended for tht activity!
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Hipster Jokes, Underground Puns, Hip Humor
Preview hip non-conventional humor, not mainstream puns, unconventional jokes of tomorrow.

Hipster Humor and Non-Mainstream Jokes
('Cause Nerdy Hipster Jokes & Dorky Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream Before Their Time for Bros in Man Buns!)
Warning: Proceed Slowly – You're Ahead of Your Time! Cool hep cat jokes and innovative hipster puns ahead.
| Hipster Jokes | Hipster Hookups | Hip Artist Jokes | 2 | Time Travel Jokes | Travel Jokes |
| Blonde Jokes | Hair Style Humor | 2 | Eyeglasses Jokes | Rockin' Jokes | Social Media Puns |
| Fashion Jokes | 2 | 3 | Shoe Groans | Furniture Jokes | Gadget Jokes | Mind Reader Jokes |

Q. How did the hipster burn his tongue eating pizza? A. He ate it before it was cool!Q. Why do hipsters tend to stick to back country streams in Colorado? A. Because they're less main stream!Q. How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hipsters change it before everybody else knew it needed to be changed!

Q. How can you tell the funny folks at PainfulPuns.com are hipsters?
A. Because there are original hipster jokes here that you have never heard before!

Q. What makes Beethoven the first true hipster in history?
A. He used # in front of everything way before there was Twitter!

Q. Why did the hipster leave his Aspen mansion by the Roaring Fork River?
A. It was too current.

Q. Why are monsters hipsters?
A. Because they've been coming out of the closet since before it was cool.

Q. Why do hipsters love ice so much?
A. Because ice was water before it was cool.

Q. What is a hipster's favorite fast food restaurant?
A. Jack Out Of The Box.

Hipster Point to Ponder: Are hipster puns cool again, or were they never in style?

Q. Why do hipster spirits like to party at the cemetery?
A. Because it's an underground club.

Q. Why do hipsters only use microwave ovens?
A. Because regular ovens are too conventional.

Hipster Point to Ponder: If a hipster does something, but he doesn't Instagram it, did it really even happen?

Q. Why did the hipster call in sick to work?
A. Because he had the uncommon cold.

Q. If a Sasquatch falls in the woods, does it make a sound?
A. Yes, but only hipsters can hear it, at this time!

Q. How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Dude, the bulb was cooler before you replaced it!

Hipster Pick-Up Line: Girl, you are so hot! So I'd like to date you before you are cool!

Time Travel Point to Ponder: Do time traveling hipsters use the main time stream?

Q. Why did the hipster use a vintage stove-top coffee pot?
A. Because it had a lot of perks.

Q. Why do hipsters use the subway?
A. Because it's so underground!

Q. What do you get if you cross a hipster and a vampire?
A. Count Swagula.

Q. What kind of facial hair does the hipster ghost at the haunted house have?
A. A soul patch.

Q. Why do hipsters only listen to dead musicians?
A. Because their music will always be at least six feet underground.

Q. Why do hipsters like lava?
A. Because hipsters liked rock before it was cool!

Q. What was the stoner hipster doing on his vacation to Colorado's back country?
A. Blazing a trail off the mainstream.

Hipster Pick-Up Line: Wow, are you a cougar? 'Cause I have a feeling you hunted guys my age before it was cool.

Q. Do old hipsters ever die?
A. Nobody knows? They just cut off the man bun so nobody notices them...

Q. How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? A. It's a very obscure number. You probably haven't heard of it!Q. What do you call hipster slang in Berlin? A. German-ology!Q. How did the hipster burn his hand? A. He changed the light bulb before it was cool!

Q. How did the wannabe hipster die?
A. Oops! He tried to cross the mainstream.

Q. Why did the hipster go swimming in the hot springs?
A. Because it was not cool yet.

Q. Where does a hipster like to go surfing?
A. On a chill wave.

Q. How did the blonde hipster drown?
A. She ice skated before it was cool.

Q. What do hipsters like to dip their strawberries in?
A. Cool Whip!

Q. Why did the hipster stand by the fan?
A. He was trying to stay cool.

Q. Why do hipsters like York Peppermint Patties?
A. Because they always taste so cool.

Hipster Stoner Tip of the Day: It is imperative that one smokes weed before it is cool! That passe burned out light bulb can wait. Pass the Bong!

Q. How did the hipster burn his tongue?
A. He ate a spicy enchilada before it was cool.

Q. What do you call it if you combine a coffee house and a yoga class?
A. There are only hipsters there for now, so it doesn't have a trendy name, yet...

Q. What kind of breakfast cereal do hipsters enjoy?
A. Emoji-Os.

Q. Why did the hipster raft down the tributary?
A.
Because the river was too mainstream.

Hipster Joke Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I'd take my glasses off for you!

Q. What's a hipster's favorite chocolate treat?
A. A frozen KitKat bar.

Hipster Stoner Tip of the Day: It's imperative that one smokes weed before it is cool!

Q. What are hipster contact lenses?
A. A pair of monocles.

Punny Hipster Point to Ponder: What if telling hipster jokes makes you a hipster?

Q. How many hipsters can fit in a phone booth?
A. Only one. Any more than that and it would be too mainstream.

Q. Why are hipsters so thin?
A. Because they have skinny genes.

Q. How much does one social media hipster weigh?
A. An obscure ratio of Insta-grams to Insta-Nets that you've never heard of.

Q. What happens if you fart in a room full of hipsters?
A. They fight each other over who picked up on it first!

Q. How can you know if a guy is a true hipster or not?
A. If he tells you he is not, then that means he actually is.

Hipster Pick-Up Line: Hello there, hottie. I'd like to play your cool B Side.

Did you hear about the trendy mountain top barber shop? It was a cut above the rest!I didn't like my beard at first, but then it grew on me.Ape says: I bought a pair of hiking boots in Colorado from a drug dealer! I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day!

Q. How do you murder a hipster?
A. Toss him into the mainstream.

Q. How do we know Mr. Spock was the original future hipster?
A. After the spores on Omicron Ceti III activated his emotions, Jill Ireland asked if he had another name. Mr. Spock replied: "Yes, but you could not pronounce it."

Did you hear about the blonde hipster who wore a jacket during summer, before it was cool?

Q. Why are Nuclei and Electrons the original hipsters of the Universe?
A. 'Cause they were hydrogen before it was cool.

Q. Why did the hipster sit in front of the air conditioner?
A. He was trying to stay cool.

Q. What do you call a hipster who plays poker well?
A. Chipster.

Q. What do you call a trendy young hula dancer?
A. A Hipster!

Q. Which breakfast treat do hipster tourists enjoy while vacationing in Colorado?
A. Vape Nuts.

Q. What does a hipster get if he poops in his skinny jeans?
A. Dungarees.

Hipster Point to Ponder: Can a hipster's harmonica make his beard look big?

Q. What do you get if you cross a refrigerator and a hipster play list?
A. Cool music.

I'm so hipster that even I haven't heard of my new favorite band yet.

Q. Why does Bruce Banner still wear classic Levi's 501 jeans in 2020?
A. Because hipster skinny jeans all have too much spandex in them!

Q. Why do hipsters dig mine shafts?
A. Because they're so far underground!

Hipster Pick-Up Line: Girl, are you a hipster? 'Cause I have something cool in my pants you haven't seen yet!

Q. Why are monsters hipsters?
A. Because they've been coming out of the closet since before it was cool.

Hipster Joke Pick-Up Line: Are you a hipster? 'Cause we should go out and fog up our glasses!

Q. If a hipster walks into the bar, does he make a sound?
A. Yes, but you've never heard of that Colorado brew pub.

Blunt Tip of the Day: It is imperative that a hipster smokes weed before it is cool! They just can't stress that enough!

Q. If a hipster trips and falls in the forest, does he make a sound?
A. Yes, but you won't likely hear of it.

Q. How much does one hipster weigh?
A. An Instagram.

Q. What do hipsters eat for breakfast?
A. Bronuts and sticky man-buns.

Hipster Point to Ponder: If a hipster goes too far, would he become a conformist?

Hipster Point to Ponder: If a bear farts in the woods, and nobody is around to hear it, would a hipster buy the soundtrack?

Monday Pick-Up Line: Hey there, are you a hipster? 'Cause it's not mainstream to meet the love of your life on a Monday.

How to prank a room full of hipsters: Silent fart in the room and watch them fight each other about who smelled it first.

Q. Why did the paleontologist and cryologist refuse to hang out with the biologist?
A. 'Cause that hipster was too current.

Q. Why did the deaf hipster attend every concert at Red Rocks Amphitheatre?
A. Because the view is cool and he likes bands he's never even heard of!

Q. Why didn't the recipe for vodka-flavored brats catch on at the LoDo hipster eatery?
A. Because it was the Absolut Wurst!

One day, you're the best thing since sliced bread. The next, you're toast!A guy walks into a psychiatrist office wearing only plastic wrap shorts. Shrink says: "Well, I can clearly see your nuts."Q. Why did McDonald's run out of McNuggets? A. A farmer counted his chickens before they were hatched!

Q. On which day of the week do hipsters launch their newest trends?
A. Weirds Day.

Q. How do you drown a hipster?
A. Take him river rafting in a main stream!

Q. How did the hipster burn his tongue?
A. He sipped a hot toddy before it was cool. (FYI: It's still not cool.)

Q. How do you get a hipster to eat a hot dog?
A. Put it in a man bun.

Hep Pick-Up Line that's ahead of its time: Babe, I ain't no hipster, but I could make your hips stir...

Q. Who was the most famous hipster of all time, and did he ever change a light bulb?
A. Who knows? Just some guy we've never even heard of!

Q. Where do hipster mice live?
A. In a mouse pad.

Q. How do you absolutely smother a hipster?
A. Standard him.

Q. How did the hipster tourist burn his tongue at Denver's Club 404?
A. He ate a green burrito before it was cool.

Q. Why do hipsters really dig carrots?
A. Because they're underground.

Hipster Beatnik Point to Ponder: If hipsters don't believe in labels, how do they refer to themselves collectively?

Q. What happened when a blonde hipster who wore a jacket in Grand Junction, Colorado during summer, before it was cool?
A. EMTs took her to the ER due to heat exhaustion.

Hipster Joke Pick-Up Line: Hey Toots, I was in love with you before your ex was!

Q. How do we know Mr. Spock was the original future hipster?
A. After the spores on Omicron Ceti III activated his emotions, Jill Ireland asked if he had another name. Mr. Spock replied: "Yes, but you could not pronounce it."

Did you hear about the blonde hipster in Colorado who wore shorts and sandals in September, before it was cool?

Q. Why is it so hard to find a hipster dog's bone?
A. Because it buried so far underground.

Q. Do old hipsters ever die?
A. If they did, you would never have heard about it.

Q. How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet?
A. What? You can't touch that toilet! It's art, man!

Q. Why did the hipster leave his riverside retreat?
A. Because it was too current.

Q. Why do hipsters only use the microwave?
A. Because they don't like conventional ovens!

Hipster Point to Ponder: Are retro hipster puns passe, or are they cool again?

Q. If a hipster trips and falls in the Evergreen, Colorado forest, does he make a sound?
A. Yes, but you won't likely hear of it.

Hipster Joke Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, are you from the area? 'Cause I only date locally-sourced babes.

Q. What's the most popular music genre of old hipsters?
A. Hip Pop.

Q. What was the hipster doing in his computer?
A. Going through the recycle bin for something retro.

Q. Which music videos did hipster locksmiths enjoy in the 60s?
A. The Monkees!

Q. How did the blonde hipster drown?
A. She ice skated on Evergreen Lake before it was cool.

Q. What do Coloradans call a hipster in Central City who plays blackjack well?
A. Chipster.

Q. How do you know you're a time-travel hipster Star Trek fanatic?
A. You want to see Deep Space Nine reruns on BBC America, and that has not even happened yet... (Hipster Update: DS9 begins January 20, 2020. Thank you, hipsters!)

Hip Hep Hipster Point to Ponder: Are there any medium rappers, or just Big and 'Lil?

Q. Which profession are hipsters well-suited for?
A. Mortician. Because all their work points six feet under ground.

Q. What killed the old hipster?
A. He drowned in the mainstream.

Q. Why is a deaf hipster the best?
A. Because he likes bands he's never even heard of!

Q. Why did the hipster abandon his Augusta lighthouse?
A. It was too Maine.

Hipster Point to Ponder: Which came first, the hipster or the mainstream?

Hipster Point to Ponder: Are retro hipster puns passe, or are they cool again?

Q. What kind of music do hipster mail carrier listen to?
A. Post-Modern Rock.

Q. What does every hipster hep cat know?
A. Four eyes are better than two.

No, I'm not a hipster. I wear glasses because I actually need them.

Q. If a hipster walks into the bar, does he make a sound?
A. Yes, but you've never heard of that pub.

Hip Hep Hipster Point to Ponder: If two vegan rappers dis each other, can you still call that a beef?

Q. Why do some hipsters have so much money?
A. Because they bought Bitcoin before it was cool.

Q. Why did the hipster tube down the High Line Canal south of Denver?
A. Because the South Platte River was too mainstream.

Time Travel Point to Ponder: Are/were hipsters actually time travelers?

Q. Why do hipsters dig old gold mines in Central City, Colorado?
A. Because they're so far underground!

Q. Why is this PainfulPuns' last hipster joke?
A. Any more hipster jokes, and this page would just be too mainstream!

| Hipster Jokes | Hipster Hookups | Hip Artist Jokes | 2 | Actor Jokes | Clown Jokes | Mime Puns |
| Blonde Jokes | Hair Stylist Puns | Social Media Puns | Gadget Jokes | Rockin' Jokes | ESP Jokes |
| Bad Hair Jokes and Barber Puns | 2 | Wig Jokes, Toupee Puns | Men's Hair Jokes, Bald Puns |
| Fashion Jokes and Clothing Puns | 2 | 3 | Hat Jokes, Cap Puns | Pants Jokes, Trouser Humor |
| Women's Fashion, Ladies Apparel Puns | Shoe Jokes, Sole-ful Puns | Colorado Fashion Jokes |
| Underwear Jokes, Ample Bra Puns, and Brief Laughs | Eyeglasses Jokes | Furniture Jokes |
| Shopping Jokes, Sale Puns | Store Jokes, Shop Puns | Grocery Store Jokes, Supermarket Puns |
| Groaner Jokes | Daily Groans | Money Jokes | Colorful Puns | Light Bulb Jokes | Travel Jokes |


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