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Brainiac
Jokes, Clever Nerdy Humor, Science Puns
Savvy
nerd jokes, geeky smart humor, and nerdy science jokes do make up everything
funny.
Smart
Puns, Brainy Science Jokes, Nerdy Humor
(Because Ingenious Jokes and
Pure Genius Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream for
Poindexter or Mr. Peabody!) |
Warning:
Proceed with Caution! Smart humor for nerds, jokes geeks get, and
chemically-induced puns ahead.
| Brainy Jokes & Smart Puns | 1
| 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8
| 9 | Brainiac
Puns | Brain Jokes | 2
|
| School Jokes, Student Puns | Teacher
Jokes | Author Jokes | Poetry
Jokes | Author Unknown |
| Book Jokes, Book Title Puns | Librarian
Jokes, Library Humor | Grammar
Jokes | Letter Puns |
| Museum Puns | Archaeology
Jokes and Paleontology Puns | Geology
Jokes | Engineer Jokes |
| Science Jokes and Scientist Humor
| Science Pick-Up Lines | Chemistry
Jokes | Physics Puns |
| Math Jokes | Weather
| Eco Jokes | Moon
Jokes | Planet Puns | Mars
Jokes | Mars Rover Jokes |
| Astronaut Jokes, Outer Space Humor,
Cosmolgy Puns | Sun Puns
| Ancient Astronaut Jokes |
Q.
What does a subatomic duck say?
A. Quark!
Smart
Factoid of the Day: Physicists are the only scientists that
matter, but mathematicians are the only ones that count.
Q.
What do you get when you combine sulfur, tungsten, and silver?
A. SWAG!
Q.
Why are Painful chemistry Puns so bad?
A. They often make you go HeHe. |
Chemistry
Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, are you made of Na, Selenium, and
Xenon? 'Cause you are Sodium SeXe!
Q.
What did the chemist say when his experiment blew up?
A. Oops! Well, oxidants happen.
Q.
Why don't they serve beer at a math party?
A. Because you shouldn't drink and derive.
Q.
What phrase should you never hear in chemistry class?
A. Bottoms Up!
|
Schrodinger's
cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.
Argon
walks into a bar. Bartender says, "Hey, we don't serve
noble gasses here." Argon didn't react...
Q.
Why is it so hard to find a good chemistry pun?
A. Because the best are Argon, so Na.
Did
you hear about the elderly scientist who discovered an effective
Alzheimer's vaccine? Unfortunately, he forgot the formula.
|
Smart
Pick-Up Line: Literate
gnome puns still aren't too smart, but funny! Ouch!
Q.
Why did the artist stop doing illustrations for currency
books?
A. 'Cause he never drew a dime!
Did
you hear about the student who was an aggressive reader?
He really hit the books.
Q.
What did one pencil say to another?
A. Bro, you are lookin' sharp today! |
Finally,
cattle mutilations explained:
Q. Why did the alien throw beef at an asteroid?
A. He wanted a little meaty-or.
Q.
What do you call somebody who is in love with the moon?
A. A lunartic.
Q.
What is the fastest liquid on the planet?
A. Milk, 'cause it's pasteurized before you even see it!
|
FYI:
Scientists have confirmed that sharp pick-up
lines do help you get an angle on the dating
scene.
Q.
Why was the obtuse angle always so frustrated?
A. Because it was never right.
Q.
Which geometry figure is like a lost bird?
A. Polygon.
Note:
Dear Math, I am not a therapist. Solve your own problems!
|
Q.
What do spacemen serve their food on?
A. Flying saucers.
Q.
Where does an overweight space alien go to workout?
A. Planet Fitness.
Q.
What did the alien say to the Jack Daniels distributor?
A. Take me to your liter.
Q.
Where do space aliens like to go fishing?
A. In the Galax Sea! |
Q.
What did the physicist hang on the lab door while he was
out on an angling vacation?
A. Gone Fission!
Q.
Why did the physicist switch over to city water?
A. He got tired of building an infinite square well.
Q.
Which doctor is least seen by his patients?
A. The Ophthalmologist!
|
Q.
Why don't blind people bother to sharpen their pencils?
A. They don't see the point of it.
Q.
Why did the kid eat his homework?
A. Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake.
Q.
How are a school teacher and a train different?
A. Teach says, "Spit out your gum," and a train
says, "Choo choo!" |
Did
you hear about the kid who accidentally stabbed the librarian
in the face with a pencil? He thought he was in big trouble,
but she merely turned a blind eye.
Q.
What do a run-on sentence and a used pencil have in common?
A. A very dull point, if any.
Q.
What's the difference between a broken pencil and a bad
joke?
A. The broken pencil has two parts. A bad joke.
... |
Q.
What very moving did the scientist give to his scientist
girlfriend?
A. Joules.
Q.
Why did the paleontologist and cryologist refuse to hang
out with the biologist?
A. 'Cause that hipster was too current.
Scientists
just found the gene for shyness. They would have found it
sooner, but it was hiding behind two other genes.
|
Q.
Which is the smartest state?
A. Alabama. 'Cause it has four As and a B.
Smart
Chat Up Line: Colby, your intellect turns me on 'cause you
are sharp cheddar.
Q.
What do sharp women call a hat for a man's brain?
A. A Condom!
Middle
School Teacher: What is Irony?
AP Student: Anything with the chemical symbol Fe. |
|
Brainy Jokes & Smart Puns | 1
| 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| 6 | 7 | 8
| 9 | Brainiac
Puns | Brain Jokes | 2
|
| School Jokes, Student Puns, Classroom
Humor | Teacher Jokes, Professor
Puns, EDU Humor |
| Author Jokes, Literary Puns, Library
Humor | 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| Poetry Jokes |
Author Unknown |
| Book Jokes, Ficticious Book Title Puns,
Apt Author LOLs | Librarian Jokes
and Library Humor |
| Grammar Jokes, Punctuation Humor
| Letter of the Alphabet Puns |
Eco Environmetal Jokes |
| Museum Puns | Archaeology
Jokes and Paleontology Puns | Geology
Jokes | Engineer Jokes |
| Science Jokes and Scientist Puns
| 2 | Science
Pick-Up Lines | Chemistry Jokes
| Physics Puns |
| Math Jokes | Weather
| 2 | 3
| 4 | Moon
Jokes | Planet Puns | Mars
Jokes | Mars Rover Jokes |
| Astronaut Jokes, Outer Space Humor
| 2 | 3
| 4 | 5
| 6 | Sun
Puns | Ancient Astronaut Jokes
|
You've geeked out this far,
so here's more nerdy snickers,
Poindexter humor,
Sherman-worthy jokes, and clever
painful puns Mr. Peabody sniffed
out:
|
More
Deft Painful Puns, Ace Groaner Jokes, and Apt Unanswered Riddles...
|
Dumb Blonde Jokes | Stupid
Bar Jokes | Astute Colorado Jokes
| Gnome Nonsense | Clever
Hipster Jokes |
| Guy Smarts | Brilliant
Light Bulb Jokes | Acute Medical Puns
| Musical Genius Jokes | Smart
Ass Pick-Up Lines |
| Mind-Bending Painful Puns |
Mind-Boggling Riddles | Mind-Numbing
Shrink Puns | On the Ball Sports Jokes
|
| Smart Techie Jokes | Savvy
Travel Jokes | Dumb Weed Jokes | Shrew-d
Witch Puns | Brainy Zombie Jokes
|
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