Q. How did the dentist become a brain surgeon? A. His drill slipped!   PainfulPuns.com - Sick Puns, Doctor Jokes, Healthy Humor

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Q. What do you call a group of brain cells that sing? A. A glia club!
Q. What do neurons use to talk to each other? A. A cell phone!
Q. What did the parietal say to the frontal? A. I lobe you!

 


Funny Brain Jokes, Mental Puns, Smart Laughs
Find neurology humor, cranial puns, brainy laughs and neuron jokes to spark a new memory.

Brainy Jokes, Memorable Puns, Neuron Humor
(Because Drugs Are TOO Mainstream and Brain Surgery Bills Hurt More Than Mindful Jokes and Brainy Puns!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Crazy brain jokes and no-brainer puns may lead to glia and laughter.
| Brainy Puns and Cerebral Jokes | 2 | Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes, Insanely Crazy Puns |
| Doctor Jokes and Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Dentist Jokes & Toothy Grins | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes and Optometrist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns | Sick Pick-Up Lines |
| Optometry Jokes | Ophthalmology Jokes | Optician Puns | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles |

Q. What do you give a person with water on the brain? A. A Tap on the HeadQ. If your dog was a neuroloist, what would he do all day? A. He'd perform pet scans!Q. Where are neurons jailed if they commit a crime? A. A nerve cell!

Q. What is the sleeping brain's favorite rock band?
A. REM.

Q. Why didn't the overly cautious brain want to take a bath?
A. It did not want to be brainwashed!

Q. Which shampoo do smart zombies like best?
A. Head and Shoulders!

Q. What is the medical term for owning too many dogs?
A. Roverdose!

There is a new sign on the lawn at the drug rehab center that reads: Please, Keep Off the Grass.

Q. Why did the blonde guy think he was safe from a zombie attack?
A. 'Cause zombies don't go after Brians.

Q. Where does a neuron keep its money?
A. In a brain bank.

Q. Why did the zombie do well on his test?
A. Because it was a real no-brainer.

A man walks into a psychiatrist's office with a carrot up his nose, celery in one ear and a banana in the other. He asks, "What's the matter with me?" The shrink replies, "You aren't eating properly."

Q. Which kind of fish performs brain surgery? A. A brain sturgeon!Ghoulish Humor: I was thinking about a brain transplant, but I changed my mind. Mad as I was, I didn't give the brain surgeon a piece of my mind.

Q. Why do neurons like email?
A. They like to send and receive a lot of messages!

Q. What do you call a glia when it's happy?
A. Smyelin.

Q. How do you deal with a zombie you really disagree with?
A. Give him a piece of your mind!

Q. How do you give a blonde a brain transplant?
A. Blow in her ear.

Q. What is it called when a zombie steals an idea?
A. Plague-giarism.

Q. What do you call a skull without 100 Billion neurons?
A. A No-Brainer!

However, zombies really ticked me off, and I mean off.

Q. What killer round did the zombie order at the bar?
A. A shot of ta-kill-ya, a Bloody Mary, and a Mind Eraser!

Q. Why is the cerebral cortex always wrong?
A. Because it's never in the right hemisphere.

Q. What do you call a hat for the brain? A. Thinking cap!Q. When does it rain brains? A. During a brain storm!Q. What do you call it when the brain scanner is broken? A. A catastrophe!

Q. What do you call a hat for a man's brain?
A. A Condom!

I heard a joke about amnesia, but now I forget how it goes...

Q. Why are most adult neurons poor at math?
A. They find it hard to divide and multiply.

Q. How are sponges and brains alike?
A. They both soak up material!

Doctor: We need to get these people to the hospital!
Nurse: What is it?
Doctor: It's a big building with lots of doctors, but that's not important right now.

Q. What are the magic words for a brainy magician?
A. Hocus Sulcus

Man: My shrink said he'd have me back on my feet in two weeks.
Friend: And, did he?
Man: Yes, I had to sell the car to pay the bill.

Q. What is the brain's favorite cable television channel? A. The Neural Network!Conversations between brain surgeons and anesthesiologists are mind numbing.Q. What did the brain say during its retirement speech? A Thanks for the memories!

Q. What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
A. Hey, kid, you've got potential.

Q. What did the Hollywood director say after finishing his film about myelin?
A. That's a wrap.

Q. Which anti-anxiety drug is manufactured in Southern California?
A. San Fernando Valium.

Q. What did the brain say after it got an electric shock?
A. That was a stimulating experience!

Q. What happened to the vegan zombie?
A. He ended up in an insane asylum where he only had access to vegetables.

Losing your head in an emergency is a real no brainer.

Q. What did the right hemisphere say to the left when they could not agree on anything?
A. Let's Split!

Doctor: I've got very bad news – you've got cancer and Alzheimer's.
Patient: Well, at least I don't have cancer.

Q. Who wrote the self-help book, One Way To Deal With Stress?
A. Val E. Umm.

| Brainy Puns and Cerebral Jokes | 2 | Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes, Insanely Crazy Puns |
| Doctor Jokes and Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Dentist Jokes & Toothy Grins | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes and Optometrist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns | Sick Pick-Up Lines |
| Optometry Jokes | Ophthalmology Jokes | Optician Puns | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles |
| Sick Medical Jokes, Hospital Puns, and Healthy Humor | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |


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