Did you hear about the optician? Two glasses, and he made a spectacle of himself.   PainfulPuns.com - Sick Puns, Doctor Jokes, Healthy Humor

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Do you ever want to just take off your glasses because you're tired of seeing things?
You'd look better if you didn't wear glases... Yeah, you'd look a lot better if I wasn't wearing my glasses!
When I want my house to look clean, I just take off my glasses!
Q. What happens when you split a prism? A. All the prism-ers escape!
I hate when I misplace my glasses becuase I'm forced to walk around looking like I'm suspicious of everything in the room!

 


Optical Jokes, Lenses Humor, Optician Puns
Catch sight of clearly funny corrective lens jokes, highly focused puns, and humor spectacles.

Optician Jokes, Humor Spectacles, Lens Puns
(Because Fitting Glasses Jokes and Eye-Rolling Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream If You Want to See the Humor!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Grinding optician jokes, corrected vision humor, and bi-focused puns ahead.
| Optician Jokes | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles | Optometry Puns | Ophthalmology Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes, Optometrist Puns, Ophthalmologist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns |
| Dentist Jokes and Toothy Grins | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Doctor Jokes, Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes, Insanely Crazy Puns | Brainy Puns and Cerebral Jokes | 2 |

Q. What is an appropriate punishment for an optician who makes you messed up lenses? A. 20 Lashes!Q. Why did a myopic marry her optician? A. It was an ideal relationship!Q. What happened to the optician who fell into the lens grinder? A. He made a spectacle of himself!

Q. What happened to the optician who had the foresight to perform at the comedy club?
A. He made a spectacle of himself!

Q. What did the optician name his new eyewear shop?
A. For Eyes.

Q. What sarcastic nickname did the optician get after he lost his glasses during a long happy hour at the bar?
A. The Light Bender.

Q. What happens when you go to an optimistic optician?
A. He'll tell you your glasses are half full.

Q. Why was the hunky optician so popular with the ladies?
A. Because he had specs appeal!

Q. Why was the new eyeglasses shop so profitable and popular?
A. Because the optician was an eye-deal-ist.

Q. What does a determined optician say about completing his focused task?
A. I'll finish, come hell or eye water!

Q. What happened after the stand-up comedian went to the optician for a new pair of glasses?
A. His observational comedy got much better!

An optician noted that patients come in all the time, embarrassed that they had sat on their glasses. While he readjusts their frames, he wonders if Hindsight really is 20/20?

Q. Why did the optician quit his job?
A. He just got tired of the daily grind.

Q. How does an optician congratulate you?
A. He gives you an eye five.

Q. What did the optician say to the guy who complained about his blurry glasses?
A. If you're going to clean your eyeglasses with a tissue, do it before you blow your nose!

Did you hear about the opticican? Two glasses, and he made a spectacle of himself.Q. What does your optician sy if you do't laugh at his pun? A. Lens not lose sight of the humor!Q. What was the len's excuse to the policeman? A. Officer, I've been framed!

Q. What did the optician say to Superman after fitting his glasses?
A. News Flash! You are Clark Kent!

Q. What did the optician say when the customer asked for a refitting?
A. Eye'd be happy to help you.

Spectacular Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, the eyes are the windows to the soul, and I frame the beauty within 'cause eye am an optician.

Q. Why did the optician want to go to the beach?
A. He heard there was a lot of eye candy there.

Q. What nickname did the optician get after trying out his comedy act on open mike night?
A. Glass Clown.

Far-Sighted Fact of the Day: Opticians are men of vision!

A lady walked into a shrink's office and announced that she had a screw loose. The blonde receptionist sent her to the optician's office next door.

Q. How does an optician know when eyes are flirting with him?
A. They go: Wink, Wink!

Optician Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you look spectacular!

Q. What are eyeglasses called on Vulcan? A. Spocktacles! Q. What do you get if you cross an optometrist convention and a donkey auction? A. Two eye-gl-asses for the price of one!Q. Why did the cell phone have to wear glasses? A. Because it lost all its contacts!

A guy goes to an optician's office and asks how much glasses cost. The optician told him it varies. The guy said, "Oh, I see clearly..." So, the optician replied, "Well, you don't need them then!"

Blurry Funny Optician Pick Up Line: Hey girl, something must be wrong with my eyes 'cause I simply cannot take them off of you.

Spectacular Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, opticians are men of vision.

Optician: It looks like you need glasses.
Patient: But, I'm wearing glasses.
Optician: Then I must need glasses...

An optician noted that patients come in all the time, embarrassed that they'd sat on their glasses. As he readjusts their frames, he wonders if Hindsight really is 20/20?

Near Sighted Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, are you an optician? 'Cause you've got specs appeal.

Q. Why do opticians like new electronics and smart appliances so much?
A. Because they're eye tech.

Q. Why was the optician so surprised when he was kicked out of the peripheral vision club?
A. He just didn't see it coming!

Anti Pick-Up an Optician Line: Dude, after a closer look, eye like you even less.

With that last eye pun, you made a true spectacle of yourself!Did you hear about the optician? Two glasses, and he made a spectacle of himself.Q. What did the frame's tag say to the de-tagging gun? A. Ex-SKUs me!

Eye Doctor Visit Point to Ponder: Why does the ophthalmoligist send you next door to the optician to choose new glasses while your eyes are dialated and you can't see worth a damn?

Q. What happened when the optician decided to try stand-up comedy?
A. He made a spectacle of himself.

Q. What does an optician call a possessed corrective lens?
A. A demon-icle.

Colorblind Optician Pick Up Line: Hey babe, no wonder the sky is gray today. All the blue is in your eyes.

Q. How does an optician come up with a rough estimate?
A. He eyeballs it.

Q. What did the determined student say when everybody laughed at him after he said he wanted to be an optician?
A. You'll see, you will all see!

Pick Up an Optician Line: Hey dude, stop undressing me with your eyes. Use your teeth instead!

Q. Why do scarecrows make the best opticians?
A. Because they are outstanding in their field.

Q. What does an optician say after making a faux pas?
A. Eye Bad!

An ophthalmologist, optometrist, and optician walked into a bar. Bartender says, "Wow, I didn't see this joke coming."

Q. How do you know your optician has an outgoing personality?
A. He likes to publically make a spectacle of himself.

Clearly Funny Optician Pick Up Line: Hey baby, your eyes are as blue as glass cleaner.

| Optician Jokes | Glasses Jokes, Eyewear Spectacles | Optometry Puns | Ophthalmology Jokes |
| Eye Doctor Jokes, Optometrist Puns, Ophthalmologist Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Eye Puns |
| Doctor Jokes and Nurse Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Germ Jokes | Dentist Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Surgeon Jokes | Urologist Jokes | Constipation Jokes | Diarrhea Jokes | Blood Jokes | 2 |
| Dopey Pharmaceutical Jokes | Futuristic Medical Jokes | Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Dr. Who Jokes |
| Sick Medical Jokes, Healthy Hospital Puns | Shrink Humor, Psychiatrist Jokes | Brain Jokes | 2 |
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