How does a blonde nurse define himorroid?
A. A guy from outerspace.
researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms.
It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure.
Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far...
doctor walked into a bank full of anti-vaxxers. With a syringe
in hand, he says, "Gimme all the money and nobody gets
How does your nurse practioner define an enema?
A. Not your friend, in the end...
Why do cardiac surgeons make terrific public speakers?
A. Because they always cut to the heart of the matter.
Why should you never open your heart to a cardiac surgeon?
A. Let them do it. It's their job!
What happens if a doctor steals your heart?
A. He gets cardiac arrested.
Doctor Pick-Up Line: Hey
baby, ICU in my dreams!
If I give up sex, drugs, and rock 'n roll, will I live longer?
Doctor: No, it'll just seem longer.
Numbing Surgical Point to Ponder: If an anesthesiologist
offers to knock you out with either gas or a boat paddle,
is that an ether/oar decision?
You only have six months to live.
Patient: I can't pay your bill.
Doctor: Okay then, I'll give you another six months.
How much does male to female gender reassignment surgery
A. Almost a third of your salary.
Why did the guy's wife leave him after he spent all their
money on multiple penis enlargement surgeries?
A. 'Cause she just couldn't take it any longer.