I accidentally farted in the Apple Store and everybody was
there was fairly offput. Hey, it's not my fault they don't
have Windows there...
Why did the hot blonde guy go to his local hardware store's
A. He heard they had a lot of fans.
Which cell phone plan does Dr. Noonien Soong use?
A. The one with unlimited Data.
Data Point to Ponder: Why don't Android users use emojis?
I was the first Android with unlimited Data!
What is the fastest network in the Alpha Quandrant?
A. The Romu-LAN.
Do old Twitter Tweeps ever die?
A. No, but they do log out.
keyboard typists never die. They just lose their justification.
bytes meet. The first byte asks, "Are you ill?"
The other byte replies, "No, just feeling a bit off."
What do Web meme artists become at Christmas time?
A. GIF givers.
How are PCs like air conditioners?
A. They stop working properly when you open Windows.
Tech Groan: Windows isn't a virus, viruses do something.
Dumb Tech Fact: Millennials make fun of their parents and
grandparents for not being tech savvy, yet they have to
Google: how to boil eggs.
Fact of the Day: Old voice mail never dies; it just doesn't
answer. Phone Fact of the Day: Old voice mail never dies;
it just doesn't answer.
What happened after technology was used to calculate the
depth of the Mariana Trench?
A. It became fathomable.
How do trees use the computer?
A. They log in!
How did a spider destroy the Web?
A. It gave it a bug!
What do you call the space between Pamela Anderson's breasts?
A. Silicon Valley.
What do you call the slow Internet service on an ocean cruise?
404 Groan of the Day: All the toilet seats at police
headquarters went missing. Investigators have nothing
to go on... Tech guys at Twitter are looking into it further.
hardware engineers never die, they just cache in their chips.
How did the old hacker die?
A. He caught a virus while on a phishing trip.
Which brand of 3D printer produces the biggest guns?