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Q. How many cheating husbands does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. None. Cheating husbands screw in motels!
Q. How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? A. Two. One to hold the bulb, and one to drink until the room spins!
Q. How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Two, but nobody knows how they got in there?

 


Glaring Puns, Lightbulb Jokes, Brilliant Humor
Light up your life with dark light bulb humor, lightly funny puns, and enlightening jokes.

Funny Light Bulb Jokes and Screwed Up Puns
(Because Glaring Light Bulb Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream If You're Left Out in the Dark!)
Warning: Change Cautiously! Burned out jokes, screw ball humor, and ever-changing puns ahead.
| Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Illuminating Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Sci-Fi Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | Burned Out Light Bulb Jokes, Burnt Humor, Dim Bulb Puns |
| Funny Riddles & Dumb Answers | Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are You Kidding? |

Q. What do Klingons do with the dead light bulb? A. Execute it for failure!Q. How many computer scientists does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. That's a hardware issue!Q. How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. Assholes never see the light anyway!

Q. How many real men does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. Real men are not afraid of the dark!

Q. How many tourists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Five. One to hold the bulb, and four to ask for directions.

Q. How many Genius Bar techs does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.

Q. How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?
A. None. Efficiency experts only replace dark bulbs!

Q. How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?
A. How many can you afford?

Q. How many safety inspectors does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Four. One to screw in the bulb, and three to hold the ladder, for safety purposes.

Q. How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? A. Hipsters change it before everybody else knew it needed to be changed!Q. How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb? A. Only one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs!Q. How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb? A. Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and one to try to sell it before it crashes!

Q. How did the hipster burn his hands?
A. He changed the light bulb before it was cool!

Q. How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?
A. It's a very rare and obscure number that you likely have not heard of.

Q. How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just one. Wanna make something of it?

Q. How many Aries does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just one, but it takes a lot of light bulbs. Smash!

Q. How many economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. If the bulb market needs to be changed, it will correct itself.

Q. How many taxi drivers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two. One to change it, and one to overcharge for the bulb.

Q. How many Borgs does it take to change a light bulb? A. All of them!Q. What did the light bulb say to the swith on Valentine's Day? A. You Turn Me On!Q. How many Emo babies does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. They just all sit in the dark and cry!

Q. How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. That's not funny!

Q. How many schizophreniacs does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Well, he thinks it's a collective decision, but it's really only one.

Q. What is the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman?
A. You can unscrew the light bulb!

Q. How many Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. None. Californians screw in hot tubs!

Q. How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One.

Q. How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One, but for the light to continue to be broadcast, please send in your donation today.

Q. How many Broncos fans does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. They just talk about doing it next year!Q. How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? A. Two. One to change it, and another to change it back again!Q. How many Romulans does it take to change a light bulb? A. 151. One to change the bulb and 150 to self-destruct the ship in disgrace!

Q. How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two. One to screw it in, and one to recover the fumble.

Q. How many college football players does it take to change a light bulb?
A. The entire team! And, they get a semester's credit for it.

Q. How many bureaucrats does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two. One to assure you everything possible is being done, and another to screw it into the water faucet.

Q. How many liberals does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Six. One to screw it in and five to screw up rebutting the neocons' lies about them.

Q. How many Cardassians does it take to change a light bulb?
A. It depends how many lights you see.

Q. How many antibiotics does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. They're there to kill it off, not help revive it!

| Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Illuminating Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Sci-Fi Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | Burned Out Light Bulb Jokes, Burnt Humor, Dim Bulb Puns |
| Funny Riddles and Dumb Answers | Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are You Crazy? |
| Are Blondes Dumb? | Why Do Pirates ARR? | Am I Funny? | Are You Kidding? | Am I Drunk? |
| Have You Seen Bigfoot? | Are You An Alien? | Why Do Vampires Bite? | Are You a Winer? |
| Why Are Hipsters Hip? | What Time Is It? | Where Am I? | Am I High? | Am I a Superhero? |
| Do I Need a Doctor? | Am I Dead? | Why Did the Cow Jump Over the Moon? | Is It Friday Yet? |

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| Seasonal Laughs | Sports Jokes | Tech Support Jokes | Time Travel Jokes | Weed Jokes | Yellow Puns |

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