What does The Incredible Hulk do to earn a living?
A. He flips houses.
Who was the first carpenter?
A. Eve. She made Adam's banana stand.
What did the blonde do after she assembled everything she
needed to laquer the new bare wood table?
A. She finished it. DUH!
What is the title of a trash collector’s memoir?
A. Dump and Dumper.
you hear about the new documentary about high-rise steelworkers?
It was absolutely riveting!
Why did they have to replace the furnace?
A. Because the one they had was not so hot.
How did the couple feel when their new air conditioner cost
more to operate than they estimated?
A. They were cool with that.
How the old mason worker pass away?
A. He threw in the trowel.
Which kind of building weighs the least?
A. A Lighthouse.
air conditioner repairmen never die, but they do lose their
What happens when a plaster delivery truck wrecks and spills
a load during rush hour?
A. You get stucco in traffic.
Why did the blonde contractor stick her finger in the ink
A. To get a blue print.
Why did the handyman buy a new truck?
A. So he could tool around!
Why haven't you heard the newest contractor joke?
A. Because it's still under construction.
Construction point to ponder: Why is it called a building
if it's already built?
How does the military fuse things together?
A. They use soldiering irons.
What is the motto of a caulking contractor company?
A. We Will Not Be Under-Sealed!
What contractors call a climbing device with rungs that
gets great reviews?
A. A ladder of recommendation.
never put up wallpaper before, so it took them a while to
get the hang of it.
Who wrote the how-not-to DIY home renovating book, Remodeling
Going Going Gone Wrong?
A. Rex King Ball.
What is it called when road workers cover a surface with
asphalt every four weeks?
A. Monthly pavements.
didn't want to believe my roomate was stealing stuff from
his road construction job, but when I got home all the signs
Why is dating so hard for steam-roller operators?
A. Because they're overly flattering.
Why was the subway construction worker quit his job?
A. Because he developed tunnel vision.
What do road construction crews use at the North Pole?
A. Snow cones.
Why did the railroad construction fall behind schedule?
A. Because they needed to get back on track.
Why did the old brick mason die while working up on the
top of the building?
A. He was mortar-fied of heights.
What happened after the spear was first invented?
A. It would be used from that point on.
plumbers never die, they just go down the drain.
garbage men never die, but they do feel rather down in the