Q.
What is the mummy's plot to destroy Superman?
A. He's going to try to lure him into the crypt tonight.
Saturday
Time Travel Point to Ponder: Is there a pause button for
Saturday Nights?
News
Flash! A powerful tornado tore through town last night.
So far, eight bodies have been recovered. Plot twister:
It only damaged the local graveyard.
Q.
Why do garden slugs carry pepper spray with them at night?
A. 'Cause they don't want to be a-salted.
Q.
Whch kind of prehistoric animal suffered from sleep apnea?
A. The Bronchial-snore-us.
Q.
Which day of the week is Svengoolie's favorite?
A. Super Sci-fi Saturday Night!
Paleontology
Professor: Which dinosaur slept all day?
Student: The dino-snore-us.
Q.
What is a mime's favorite time of the day?
A. Dusk, because all the colors are muted.
|
Q.
How do cops grill a chicken?
A. Repeatedly ask her why she crossed the road last night.
Q.
Why do raindrops like lightning at night?
A. Because they can see where they're going.
Q.
Why don't Coloradans drink Flat Tire beer when they're partying
on Saturday night?
A. Why tempt fate or dare the devil?
Q.
What do blondes in Grand Junction, Colorado call traveling
on backcountry roads with the high beams on at night?
A. A bright idea.
Horse
Pick-Up Line: Hay girl, are your hooves sore? 'Cause you've
been galloping through my dreams all night long.
Q.
What do you call a scary female horse?
A. A nightmare!
Colorado
Craft Beer Point to Ponder: After sampling numerous tasty
beers on Saturday night, shouldn't there be Hop Tarts
to toast your Sunday morning?
Q.
What did the garden gnome think when flowers without heads
mysteriously appeared in the garden every night?
A. He thought he must be being stalked.
|
Q.
Which night of the weekend just ambles on in and then casually
strolls off?
A. Saunter Day.
New
Year's Eve Pick-Up Line: Hey Babe, you don't have to wait
'til midnight to see my balls drop.
Q.
What do cows say at midnight when the ball drops?
A. Happy Moo Year!
Q.
What do you call wanting a date by midnight on New Year's
Eve?
A. Social Security.
Q.
What did the over-enthusiastic party goer say to the host
at midnight?
A. Mind if I hang over at your place in the morning?
Q.
What kind of horse loves Friday the 13th?
A. A Nightmare!
Q.
Does British nobility ever watch baseball?
A. Only when it's a knight game.
Friday
Night Point to Ponder: Is Saturday morning inevitable, or
can you just put it off until Sunday or Monday?
|