Q. What is a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A. Arrr? No, the C is his love!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. What did the sailor in the crow's nest say to his captain? A. Eye Eye!
Q. Why is pirating so addictive? A. Because once ye lose yar first hand, ye are hooked!
Q. How much is a pirate willing to pay for corn? A. A Buck An Ear!
Q. Why don't pirates shower before they walk teh plank? A. Because they'll just wash up on shore later!

 


Pirate Puns, High Seas Humor, Matey Funny Puns
Ahoy! Drop anchor for jolly good hook-up humor, arrt-ful pirate puns, and mighty marine jokes.

Pirate Jokes, Swashbuckler Puns, Booty Humor
(Because Pirate Jokes and Hooky Humor Could Never Be TOO Mainstream for Sailors at Sea – or Popeye!)
Warning: Yarr, Matey. Proceed with Caution! Keeler jokes, barnacle humor, and avast porthole 'o puns ahead.
| Pirate Jokes and Arr-ful Buccaneer Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Salty Pirate Pick-Up Lines |
| Arr! Talk Like A Pirate Jokes | 2 | High Seas Humor, Boat Jokes, Sea Captain Puns | 2 |
| Pirate Cuisine Jokes and Salty Food Puns | Seafood Jokes, Crusty Crab Humor, Fish Fry Puns |
| Sport Fishing Jokes and Fisherman Puns | Fishy Jokes | Finny Fish Puns | Groggy Jokes |

Q. How do pirates communicate with each other? A. With an Aye Phone!Q. Why did the pirate cross the road? A. To reach the second hand shop!Q. How much did the pirate pay for his peg and hook? A. An arm and a leg!

Q. What did the pirate captain say to the jokester?
A. Aye, walk the prank!

Q. How did the pirate ship captain know he found land?
A. He was shore of it.

Pirate Rap Pick-Up Line: My lady, I just met you and this is crazy, but I'm a pirate, so call me matey.

Q. Why couldn't the pirate eat caRRRot cake?
A. Because he was on a low caRRRb diet.

Q. Why don't pirates need to rent a safe deposit box at the bank?
A. Because they store their booty in Davy Jones locker.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: YaRRR! How 'bout I stick my cannon in your porthole?

Q. Which pirate ship has a closed entry?
A. A frigate.

Q. What does a pirate take when he decides to fly instead of sail?
A. An aRRRplane!

Sailor: I know a pirate with a wooden leg named, "Bob."
Blonde: Reallly? I wonder what his hook is named?

Q. Why didn't Captain Hook have any children?
A. Jock Itch. Ouch!

Pirate Pick-Up Line: Is that a wooden leg, or are you just happy to see me?

Q. What is the best surprise for a pirate on his birthday?
A. A big paRRRty!

Q. What is a pirate's best subject in school? A. Arrrt!Q. What is a pirate's favorite vegetable? A. Arrrtichokes!Pirate Pick-Up Line: Surrender Your Booty!

Q. How did the pirate get through school?
A. By sailing through the high Cs.

Q. Who was the first pirate?
A. Noah. He built the ARRRk!

Q. What is the hardest thing to clean off a pirate ship?
A. The baRRRnacles.

Q. Where does a peg leg pirate go to buy a used car?
A. IHOP.

Q. What is a buccaneer?
A. A great price for corn on the cob.

Q. What type of weight loss diet do overweight pirates go on?
A. Low caRRRb.

Q. Which dish do pirates order for dinner at Long John Silvers?
A. The swordfish.

Q. Which Greek god do pirates admire most?
A. ARRtemis.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: My lady, I'll let you in on one big secret. That's no peg leg.

Q. Why didn't the two algae ever have sex?
A. Because they had a planktonic relationship.

Q. Why did the pirate start doing drugs?
A. Pier pressure.

Q. Which U.S. state do redneck pirates visit while on the hunt for southern belles?
A. ARRkansas.

Q. Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet? A. Because they spend years at C!Q. What is a pirate's favorite restaurant? A Arrrby's!Q How good was the pirate's golf game? A. Parrr!

Q. What is a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?
A. If you guessed R, you R wrong! The C is loved most by pirates.

Q. Why do pirates do so well in elementary school?
A. Because the 3 aRRRs come so naturally to them!

Q. Which character on Green Acres was the favorite of 1960s pirates?
A. ARRnold Ziffle.

Q. Which soft drink to nostalgic pirates miss most?
A. RRR-C Cola.

Q. What are pirate children afraid of?
A. The daRRRk.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: My lady, aRRR ye free on Saturday night?

Q. Where do pirates hang out in the southern hemisphere?
A. ARRgentina.

Q. Why did the pirate give up the game of golf?
A. Because he kept hooking the ball.

Q. Which kind of socks do pirates wear?
A. Arrrgyles.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: Ahoy! Wanna get swashbuckled tonight?

Q. Where do pirates on shore leave hang out in the garden?
A. In the shadey aRRbor.

Q. How do pirates prefer to communicate? A. Aye to Aye!Q. What do you call a pirate who skips school? A. Captain Hooky!Q. Which style of food do pirates enjoy most? A. Barrrbeque!

Q. What do pirates do when they have a disagreement with another pirate?
A. They arrgue.

Q. Why aren't pirates allowed to be contestants on Wheel of Fortune?
A. Because they always buy an Aye!

Q. What is a pirate's favorite movie?
A. Booty and the Beast.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: Ahoy wench! How about we get together to haul some keel?

Q. Why did the novice pirate boxer go pro so quickly?
A. Nobody could handle his left hook.

Q. How did the pirate become a lawyer?
A. He passed the BaRRR exam.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: Ahoy, wench! Would ye like the honor of scraping the barnacles off me rudderRR?

Q. Why did the sea buccaneer keep a pet tarantula?
A. Because pirates like ARRachnids.

Q. What does a gourmet pirate chef add to his dinners?
A. GaRRRnishes.

Q. What is a pirate's second favorite mode of transportation?
A. CaRRRR.

Q. Which kind of bottled water do pirates carry aboard ship?
A. ARRtesian well water.

Pirate Pick-Up Line: Avast, my lady! Wanna know why my Roger is so Jolly?

| Pirate Jokes and Arr-ful Buccaneer Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | Salty Pirate Pick-Up Lines |
| Arr! Talk Like A Pirate Jokes | 2 | High Seas Humor, Boat Jokes, and Sea Captain Puns | 2 |
| Pirate Cuisine Jokes and Salty Food Puns | Seafood Jokes, Crusty Crab Humor, Fish Fry Puns |
| Sport Fishing Jokes and Fisherman Puns | Fishy Jokes | Finny Fish Puns | Groggy Jokes |
| Travel Jokes | World Traveler Jokes | Cross the Road Jokes | Time Travel Puns | Timely Jokes |
| Groaner Jokes | Daily Groaners | Police Puns | Lawyer Groans | Criminal Jokes | Money Groans |
| Hipster Jokes | Bad Hair Puns | 2 | Blonde Jokes | 2 | Light Bulb Jokes | Fair Weather Puns |

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