| Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You can curse in Klingon, Cardassian, and Ferrengi.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You stand out in the Perseid Shower and say, "Another
exploding Borg cube," every time you see a falling
star.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You insist on calling your doctor "Bones."
Or, you called your vet "Bones" and the name stuck!
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. If you've ever thought to yourself, "Whoa, did that
outfit get stuck in a pattern buffer?"
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your friends are Trekkers, but you're still open to meeting
Trekkies and other aliens, too.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You've accidentally closed a job search cover letter
saying, "Live Long and Prosper."
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You only speak Klingon when you accidentally answer a
robo call.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. If you've ever wondered about what Starfleet underwear
looks like, or thought about designing the undies for the
end-all Star Trek series.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You can curse in Klingon, Romulan, and Zorn.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. Your parrot randomly curses in Klingon, Romulan, and
Ferengi.
Q.
How do you know you're a bona fide Trekker?
A. The Star Trek convention was over two weeks ago, but
you're still wearing your com badge.
Q.
How do you know you're a Trekker or a Trekkie?
A. That doesn't matter in Star Trek because all the restrooms
are uni-sex.
Q.
How do you know you're a pure-bred Trekker?
A. Youn named your Irish Setter, Red Alert.
Old
Star Trek pilots never die, but they do shuttle on to another
plane of existance.
Old
Trekkies never die. True story! |
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You didn't even question why these jokes are not about
Trekkies!
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know the difference between Warp, Transwarp, and
Slipstream drives. Duh!
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You can actually tell the difference between a Romulan
and a Vulcan.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. When you find yourself in a sticky situation, you say,
"Scotty, Beam Me Up!"
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You've shown up to jury duty wearing your Star Trek uniform.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You fully appreciate the effects of synthehol, and you've
tried to replicate some along with your home brewing.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your dog's name is Worf.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You scare away door-to-door solicitors by acting like
a Gorn.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know the difference between "Live Long and Prosperly"
and "Live Long and Prosper."
Q.
How do you know you're a true Klingon Trekkie?
A. When you go to PetSmart for pet tortoise food, you ask
for Gagh.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. Your chatty pet parrot's name is Lwaxana.
Q.
How can you tell you're a Trekker?
A. You've built Starfleet Academy out of Legos and won't
let children play with it.
Q.
How do you know you're a Trekker?
A. You're not too chicken to cross the road to the port-a-potty
on Talos IV.
Q.
How do you know your parents are Trekkies?
A. Your middle name is Tiberius and your sister's middle
name is Lwaxana.
Q.
How do you remain a lifelong Trekker?
A. You always order Red Alert chili for lunch.
Old
Trekkies never die. They just go on to another generation.
|
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Nobody bats an eye when you say, "Make it so,"
during a business meeting.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You're afraid to wear a red shirt!
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. When you put the key in the ignition, you say, "Engage!"
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. When you hear somebody say, "He's an enterprising
young man," you look for his com badge.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your eldest son's middle name is Tiberius.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You decorate your rec room to look like the Enterprise
bridge.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You want to change Siri's name to "Computer."
And, you want to change Alexa's name to "Mudd's Women."
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You're hoping your toddlers can use their college
fund to go to Starfleet Academy.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know the difference between "Live Long and Prosper"
and "Nanu Nanu."
Q.
How do you know you're a Trekkie?
A. You understand how and why the appearance of Klingons
changed so dramatically in a generation.
Q.
How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. Your dog complies to commands in Klingon, Romulan, and
Borg.
Q.
How do you know you were born to be a Trekkie?
A. Your godfather is Noonien Soong and your uncle is Khan
Noonien Singh.
Q.
How do you know you're a hen-pecked Trekkie?
A. The ringtone for your wife is the Red Alert siren!
Q.
How do you know you're a devoted Trekker?
A. After reading all these Painful Trekkie
Puns, you've been inspired to join Starfleet Academy.
Old
episodes of Star Trek never die. They live on in our hearts,
and in sydicated reruns! |
