Q. What's it called when the strategic ops officer on DS9 runs as fast as he can? A. Worf Speed!   PainfulPuns.com - Painful Puns, Punny Funs, Groaners, Ouch!

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McCoy Says: Doctor's orders, Jim. Be a vulcan in the streets and a Klingon in the sheets!
Q. How many Romulans does it take to change a light bulb? A. 151. One to change the bulb and 150 to self-destruct the ship in disgrace!

Did you hear about the Federation weapons expert? A. He never forgets a phaser!
Q. What does a Romulan frog use for camouflage? A. A croaking device!
Q. Why was Star Trek so successful? A. It had good Genes!

 


Klingon Humor, PetaQ Puns, Worf Jokes
Kronos humor, Qapla' puns, Klingon comedy, and Imperial Empire jokes that Kahless laughs at.
Tihingan Hol vljatlhaHbe'
!
(I cannot speak Klingon!)

Worf Humor, Klingon Jokes, Star Trek Puns
(Because QamuSHa' Jokes and Star Trek Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream on Q'onoS, Especially in First City!)
Warning: Proceed With Caution! Klingon language puns and macho Star Trek warrior jokes to p'tak about ahead.
| Klingon Puns | Star Trek TNG Jokes | 2 | 3 | The Borg Jokes | Ladies of Star Trek Jokes |
| Star Trek The Original Series Jokes and TOS Puns | 2 | 3 | Starship Enterprise Captain Jokes |
| Star Trek Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Spock Puns and Vulcan Jokes | 2 | Trekkie Jokes |
| Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes | Sci-Fi Cross the Road Jokes | Sci-Fi Light Bulb Jokes |

Q. What did Worf say when small ice asteroids began hitting the hull? A. Capain, we are being hailed!Q. What do Klingons do with the dead light bulb? A. Execute it for failure!Q. How are the Enterprise and toilet paper alike? A. Both circle Uranus wiping out Klings!

Q. Where do Klingons shop for towels, small home appliances, and weapons?
A. Bed Bat'leth and Beyond.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You bring Klingon side dishes to pot luck gatherings.

Q. Where do stoner Klingons store their leftovers?
A. In a Zip'loc!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your father looks a lot like a Klingon!

Q. Why was Lt. Worf such an outstanding mountain climber?
A. Because he was a true Kling-on.

Q. What do Klingons feed their pet Warriguls (monster dogs)?
A. Tribbles and Bits.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your dog's name is Worf.

Q. Where does Mr. Worf go shopping for new footwear?
A. Kahless ShoeSource.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. A coworker says, "Good Morning," and you reply, "Ka Plah!"

Q. Where do Klingons like to vacation in San Francisco California?
A. Fisherman's Worf.

Star Trek T.P. Advice: Never buy cheap toilet paper so that you aren't stuck in the bathroom battling Klingons.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You've already Googled the Net for more Uranus jokes.

Q. How can you tell you are addicted to a futuristic Star Trek lifestyle?
A. When you're stuck in traffic, Siri automatically plays Klingon opera.

Q. Why aren't Romulan bathrooms malodorous?
A. They use cloaking devices! (Plus, they put the seat down.)

Q. Why did the Klingon cross the road? A. To conquer the other side!Q. Why did Worf change his hair color? A. It was a good day to dye!Why did the chicken cross the road? For the honor of all chickens! – Mr Worf

Q. Why did the Klingon chicken cross the road?
A. To boldly go watch Star Trek Next Generation reruns.

Q. Why did the foxy Klingon cross the road?
A. He heard about all the chickens on the other side.

Q. How fast can a Klingon flee when being chased by the Borg?
A. At Worf Speed.

Q. What did the Klingon say to the shuttle craft pilot?
A. Today is a good day to fly!

Q. What is a Klingon's favorite shoe store?
A. Pah-less.

Q. What is a cartoon Klingon's favorite convenience store?
A. The Quark-E Mart!

Q. Why did the Klingon hen cross the road?
A. To prove she wasn't a PetaQ chicken and for the Qapla!

Q. Why don't lifelong Star Trek fans ever grow out of it?
A. 'Cause they just Kling-on.

Q. Why didn't the avian droid just fly cross the road?
A. Because it was programmed by a chicken.

Q. What do Klingons do with the Klingon who replaced a light bulb? A. Execute him for cowardice!Klingon version of Gone With the Wind: After all, tomorrow is another good day to die!Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab him in the back and take all the credit!

Q. How can you tell an old Klingon warrior no longer has honor?
A. He uses a Nerf bat'leth.

Q. What slogan is featured on Klingon army recruitment posters?
A. Visit exotic planets, meet interesting peoples, and kill them!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your bumper sticker reads: Born Human, Klingon by Choice.

Klingon Proverb:
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, prepare to die.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You sing Klingon opera when you're in the shower!

Q. Which kind of neck tie does Worf wear to formal Federation ocassions?
A. A Kling-on.

Q. Why do Klingons like Tribbles?
A. Tribbles make great earmuffs and cranial ridge warmers.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your bumper sticker reads: Don't laugh. My other vehicle is a Klingon Bird of Prey.

Q. How can you tell if a Klingon warrior has true honor?
A. After the blood wine is rolled out, he's always the designated driver.

Worf you ready for some football? Go Broncos!Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb? A. None. Klingons are not afraid of the dark!Worf Asks: Why can't Klingon kids play in sandboxes? A. Cats keep trying to cover them up!

Worf is rooting for Denver to Klingon to the ball more. Go Broncos!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You shout, "Ka Plah!" when the Broncos score and taunt the other team by saying, "Raiders, today is a good day to die!"

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. When you lose your temper, you swear at that petaQ in Klingon!

Q. Who is Bigfoot's favorite Star Trek character?
A. B'Elanna Torres. And, he finds all Klingon babes really hot, too!

Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two. One to screw in the bulb, and another to stab him in the back and take the credit.

Q. What is a Klingon's favorite discount department store?
A. K'Mart.

Q. Where do Klingons shop for cheap furniture and meatballs?
A. I'Qeah.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You didn't have to Google a single Klingon word on this page because you already knew what it meant.

Q. Who is gay Bigfoot's favorite Star Trek character?
A. Worf. And, he finds all Star Wars Wookiees hot, too!

Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb?
A. None. A true Klingon warrior battles equally as well in the dark!

Q. What does a Klingon dog say?
A. Worf, Worf!

Q. What does a Klingon put in his boots to stop them from stinking?
A. Odo-Eaters!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know which Klingon terms on this page are real and which ones are puns – and you literally get the joke!

Q. How many languages does Ancient Aliens icon Giorgio Tsoukalos speak?
A. English, French, German, Greek, Italian and Klingon.

Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One. A Klingon would never be dishonored by allowing another to assist in such a menial task.

| Star Trek TNG Jokes | 2 | 3 | The Borg Jokes | Enterprise Captains | Ladies of Star Trek Jokes |
| Klingon Puns |
Star Trek Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Spock Puns | 2 | Star Trek TOS Puns | 2 | 3 |
| Lost in Space Jokes | Space Bar Jokes | Science Fiction Food Jokes | 2 | 3 | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes |
| Dr Who Jokes, Tardis Puns, Whovian Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cyberman Jokes | Dalek Puns |
| Star Wars Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Darth Vader Dark Side Humor | Wookiee Puns | Yoda Jokes |
| ET Alien Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Green Spaced Alien Puns | Cows In Space Jokes | Outer Space |
| Science Fiction Doctor Jokes | 2 | Sci-Fi Cross the Road Jokes | 2 | Sci-Fi Light Bulb Jokes | 2 |

| Science Fiction Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | Sci-Fi Pick Up Lines |

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Ghuy'cha', you still have your honor, so here's more Hagh Hagh laughter,
jokes Klingons like, and nuqDaq'oH puchpa"e' puns that lead to the toilet
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