Q. How are the Enterprise and toilet paper alike? A. Both circle Uranus wiping out Klings!   PainfulPuns.com - Painful Puns, Punny Funs, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. What is Will Riker's dating philosophy? A. If at first you don't succeed, Troi again!

 


TNG Puns and Star Trek The Next Generation Jokes
Say Qapla' to warped Star Trek humor, assimilate Borg puns, and file brainy positronic jokes.

Star Trek TNG Jokes and Next Gen Puns
(Because Star Trek The Next Generation Jokes Could Not Be TOO Mainstream In Klingon Opera or Q Continuum!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Peril! Worf road ahead! Just Klingon to the seat of your paradox pants.
| Star Trek TNG Jokes | 2 | 3 | Klingon Puns | The Borg Jokes | Ladies of Star Trek Jokes |
| Star Trek The Original Series Jokes and TOS Puns | 2 | 3 | Starship Enterprise Captain Jokes |
| Star Trek Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Spock Puns and Vulcan Jokes | 2 | Trekkie Jokes |
| Sci-Fi Doctor Jokes | Cyborg Jokes, Android Puns | Sci-Fi Robot Jokes | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes |

Q. What do Klingons do with the dead light bulb? A. Execute it for failure!Data Asks: Have you rea the book, The Positronic Brain? It's by Anne Droid!Did you hear about the new uniform-making machine on the Enterprise? Picard told Riker to make it sew!

Q. What do Klingons feed their pet Warriguls (monster dogs)?
A. Tribbles and Bits.

Q. How can you know for sure that you're a true Trekkie?
A. Your dog's name is Worf.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. A coworker says, "Good Morning," and you reply, "Ka Plah!" because your coworker doesn't understand what Qapla' means.

Mr. Data: Perhaps this meme was not funny?

Q. What is the fastest network in the Alpha Quandrant?
A. The Romu-LAN.

Lore: I was the first Android with unlimited Data!

Q. What did the Star Trek TNG crew say about Mr. Data's poem, An Ode to Spot?
A. MeWow?

Q. How does Captain Picard like his women?
A. The same way he likes his tea: HOT!

Q. What does Captain Picard say at Christmas time?
A. Make It Snow!

Q. Why did Commander Riker thread the needle?
A. So he could make it sew!

Q. Why did Mr. Homn cross the road?
A. To get away from Lwaxana Troi.

Q. How many Romulans does it take to change a light bulb? A. 151. One to change the bulb and 150 to self-destruct the ship in disgrace!Why did the chicken cross the road? I knew it was going to happen! I could sense it! – Deanna TroiWorf Asks: Why can't Klingon kids play in sandboxes? A. Cats keep trying to cover them up!

Q. How many Cardassians does it take to change a light bulb?
A. It depends how many lights you see.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You can actually tell the difference between a Romulan and a Vulcan.

Q. Do Romulans have pointy ears?
A. Before or after sex?

Q. What did Counselor Troi say to the EMH?
A. You're projecting again.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know Deanna Troi can feel your pain.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. Don't you just hate sci-fi time parodox jokes?

Q. Why did Miles O'Brien cross the road?
A. To get away from Keiko.

Q. What does a Klingon dog say?
A. Worf, Worf!

Q. What does a Klingon put in his boots to stop them from stinking?
A. Odo-Eaters!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You know which Klingon terms on this page are real and which ones are puns – and you literally get the joke!

The Borg assimilated my henhouse and all I got was this lousy occular implant!Q. How many Klingons does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab him in the back and take all the credit!Q. Why don't the Borg go to prison? A. Because they obey the Lore!

Q. What did one Borg say to another when right before their ship was destroyed in sector zero zero one?
A. Hoisted by our own Picard...

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. Because her starship was being assimilated by Locutus of Borg.

Q. What do you call it when two Star Trek science officers have an argument?
A. Science Friction!

Q. Why do Klingons like Tribbles?
A. Tribbles make great earmuffs and cranial ridge warmers.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. Your bumper sticker reads: Don't laugh. My other vehicle is a Klingon Bird of Prey.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You can curse in Klingon, Cardassian, and Ferrengi.

Q. What does Locutus of Borg say when he meets you?
A. MY name is Borg, James Borg, and I have a license to assimilate.

Q. What is Locutus of Borg's out-going voicemail message?
A. We are Borg. You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile. But, we can't take your call right now, so leave a message after the tone and we'll assimilate you later. BEEP.

Q Where do the Borg eat fast food? A. At their local Borger King!Cow Says: My other vehicle was assimilated by the Borg!Klingon version of Gone With the Wind: After all, tomorrow is another good day to die!

Q. What is Borger King's slogan?
A. We do it our way. Your way is irrelevant.

Q. How did Commander Data describe the Borg?
A. Cool, calm, and collective.

Q. Why don't Ferrengi make good Borg drones?
A. Their very nature can't be unprogrammed and they can't help saying, "Insert coin for assimilation."

Q. Why did the Borg cow cross the road when it saw a UFO?
A. To get to the udder side!

Star Trek TNG Groan of the Day: I am Heisenborg. You will probably be assimilated.

Q. What did Missionary of Bajor mutter to all he encountered?
A. Thou shall be assimilated, my good man. Ye shall not resist, for that is futile.

Klingon Proverb:
Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, prepare to die.

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekkie?
A. You sing Klingon opera when you're in the shower!

Q. How do you know you're a true Trekker?
A. You are not Romulan and understand exactly why the Next Generation of Klingons have cranial ridges.

| Star Trek TNG Jokes | 2 | 3 | The Borg Jokes | Enterprise Captains | Ladies of Star Trek Jokes |
|
Star Trek Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Spock Puns | 2 | Star Trek TOS Puns | 2 | 3 | Klingon Puns |
| Lost in Space Jokes | Space Bar Jokes | Science Fiction Food Jokes | 2 | 3 | Sci-Fi Toilet Jokes |
| Dr Who Jokes, Tardis Puns, Whovian Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Cyberman Jokes | Dalek Puns |
| Star Wars Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Darth Vader Dark Side Humor | Wookiee Puns | Yoda Jokes |
| ET Alien Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Green Spaced Alien Puns | Cows In Space Jokes | Outer Space |
| Science Fiction Doctor Jokes | 2 | Sci-Fi Cross the Road Jokes | 2 | Sci-Fi Light Bulb Jokes | 2 |

| Cyborg Jokes, Android Puns | Sci-Fi Robot Jokes | Science Fiction Jokes | Sci-Fi Pick Up Lines |

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