Q. What do you call rude Canada geese in a Colorado park? A. @#$%^&*! And, Coloradans are pretty polite.   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. What do hikers drink in Colorado? A. Mountain Dew!
Q. Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? A It was two-tired!
If you're tubing down a river right now, is that a current event?
Groaner Pun: A bear was hit by an 18-wheeler. It was a grizzly accident.

 


Travel Jokes, Getaway Puns, Highway Humor
Transport yourself to fast-moving travel humor, vacation puns, and free-wheeling trip jokes.

Vacation Jokes, Traveler Humor, Road Trip Puns
(Because Fast-Moving Getaway Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream When You're Waiting for the Bus!)
Warning: Go Off-Roading at Your Own Risk! First-class humor, trippy jokes, and planeless puns ahead.
| Travel Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | World Traveler Jokes | British Travel Jokes | USA State Jokes |
| Traffic Jokes, Road Trip LOLs | Car Puns | Auto Mechanic Jokes | Truck Jokes | Commute Jokes |
| Gas Station Jokes | Air Travel Jokes | Mile High Club Jokes | Motorcycle Jokes | Bicycle Puns |
| Space Travel Puns | Time Traveler Jokes | On Time Puns | Sea Travel Humor | 2 | Train Jokes |


Bigfoot: Official North Amerian Hide and Seek Champion!Q. Which superhero uses public transportation? A. Bus Lightyear!Q. What do you call a pickle run over on a highway? A Road Dill!

Q. What did the history traveler say when he opened the Gates at the dig site?
A. I'm just Josh 'n ya!

Travel Point to Ponder: If Catwoman decided to move to Nepal, what would Catman do?

Q. How do you describe the progress of the new subway line?
A. It was under way.

Q. Why don't mummies like to go on vacation?
A. Because they're afraid to relax and unwind!

Q. How do you describe a cross-country trip taken in super-fast train?
A. Quick and planeless.

Q. Why couldn't the avid toy train collector stop talking about it?
A. Because he had a one-track mind.

Q. Why did the sun only pack one hat for vacation?
A. Because it was traveling light!

Q. How are a Volkswagen and a bathtub alike?
A. You don't want to get out of either while people are watching.

Q. What do ghouls send their pals when they go on vacation?
A. Ghost cards.

Q. What do you call a tractor-trailer driver who does okay for himself?
A. Semi successful.

Q. What does a frog eat on summer vacation?
A. Hopsicles.

Q. Why did the blonde guy put a stove in his car?
A. To get a hot rod.

Are we where yet? Yes, It's Where's-Day!Never go hiking with a serial killer in Colorado! Just give hm free reign on the psycho path!Q. Where do Volkswagons go when they get old? A. To the old Volks home!

Q. What kind of car does a chicken drive on vacation?
A. Yolkswagen.

Q. Why did the tourist get a babysitter in Italy?
A. So he'd be free to Roma.

Q. Why did the American conjoined twins vacation in England?
A. So the other one could drive.

Q. Why are Irish bankers always so successful?
A. Because their capital's always Dublin.

Two blondes were on a road trip to Denver. The sign said, "Denver Left," so they started crying and went home.

Q. How many tourists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Five. One to hold the bulb, and four to ask for directions.

Q. Which kind of cars do prostitutes in Norway drive?
A. Fjord Escorts.

Q. What is the specialty of the French drug dealer?
A. Oui-d.

Q. How do hypnotists travel when they go on vacation?
A. They use public trance-port-ation.

Travel Pick-Up Line: Hey Babe, why don't you wander lust over this way?

Q. When is a car not an automobile?
A. When it turns into a driveway!

Q. What kind of race car did the chef drive?
A. A souped-up vehicle!

Q. Why do chicken coups have two doors?
A. Because if they had four doors, they'd be chicken sedans!

When someone claimed the skipper was unskilled at mooring the ship, he replied, "You're one to dock!"Q. What do you need to become an expert mechanic? A. Fine Motor Skills!Ram says: Have you heard the story about a hill in Colorado? I just couldn't get over it!

Q. Where do accordian players go to vacation?
A. The Florida Keys.

Q. Which California city is the most musical vacation destination?
A. Santa Harmonica.

Seaworthy Point to Ponder: The Titanic was built to last; let that sink in.

Q. What did the tornado say to the sports car?
A. Hey, let's go for a spin!

Q. Which kind of car should you drive if you want the fastest fast food?
A. A Lam-burger-ini.

Q. Why did the blonde hate the summer road trip?
A. It was driving her crazy!

Q. Why don't more aliens visit our planet?
A. Terrible ratings – only one star!

Q. Why did Humpty Dumpty have a great fall?
A. Because he had a miserable summer vacation.

Q. How are England and Colorado alike?
A. England has Stonehenge and Colorado has stoned hedges!

Space Shuttle Says: Happy Flight Day!Q. Where do Alaskans keep their money? A. Fairbanks!Q. What is the spot seen on a radar screen when an airship is flying? A. The Goodyear Blip!

Q. Why did the light-footed cop pull over the U-Haul?
A. He wanted to bust a move.

Q. Why did the cop ticket the computer?
A. Because it was speeding along the information highway!

Q. Why did the police officer cry after arresting the tourist?
A. It was a moving violation.

Travel Pick-Up Line: Hey, are you from Stockholm? 'Cause you're the Swedish girl I've ever seen.

Q. Which great vacation destination of the north is inhabited by many short, bearded beings?
A. Gnome, Alaska.

Q. Where do math teachers go on a vacation back East?
A. Times Square.

Q. What did the blonde helicopter pilot say after the crash?
A. Well, it was getting hot, so I just turned the fan off.

Travel Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, are you from South England? 'Cause you Brighton up my day.

Q. Which Europeans travel the most?
A. Romans.

Q. Why did the cops pull over the Mini Cooper full of clowns?
A. For the fun of it, plus they obviously weren't wearing seat belts.

Q. Why do pilots always travel first-class while on vacation?
A. Because they can handle sky-high prices.

Travel Pick-Up Line: Hey Babe, I want to flip your Ipswich over Andover, Andover again!

| Travel Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | World Traveler Jokes | Europe Vacation | British Travel Jokes |
| France Travel Jokes | Great White North Travel Jokes | USA State Jokes | Travel Hookup Lines |
| Traffic Jokes and Road Trip Humor | Gas Jokes, Petrol Puns | Car Puns | Auto Mechanic Jokes |
| Truck Jokes, Semi Puns, Trucker Humor | Taxi, Cab, Uber, Limo Jokes | Train Travel Jokes |
| Bicycle Jokes, Bike Puns | Motorcycle Jokes | Biker Gnome Jokes | River Jokes, Upstream Puns |
| Space Travel Puns | Time Traveler Humor | On Time Jokes | Redneck Jokes, Good Ol' Boy LOLs |
| Air Travel Jokes, Airport Humor | Mile High Club Jokes | Sea Trip Puns | 2 | Gnome Travel Jokes |
| Cross the Road Jokes | Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Sci-Fi Crossed the Road | 2 |
| Colorado Commuter Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Mile High Denver Jokes | Colorado Tourism Jokes |
| You Might Be From Colorado If... | Mountain Jokes | Hipster Humor | Painful Groaner Jokes |

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You've lasted this far, so here's even more getaway laughter,
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