Ape Chef Asks: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? How sad he ran out of thyme!   PainfulPuns.com - Old Never Die Puns, Old Age Humor, Old Jokes!

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One day, you're the best thing since sliced bread. The next, you're toast!
Chimp Chef Says: Saw my dad chopping up Onions today and I cried. Onions was a good dog!

After the Butcher Backed Into His Meat Grinder, He Got a Little Behind in His Work.

 


Old Chefs Never Die Jokes and Over Cooked Humor
Bite it with deadly funny chef puns, flame-broiled cook humor, and dining to die for jokes.

Old Cook Jokes, Dead Chef Humor, Baked Puns
(Because Burned Out Chef Jokes and Fried Cook Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream After the Timer's Gone Off!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Dead kitchen gadget jokes, burnt cook humor, and toasted baker puns ahead.
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Old Cooks Never Die, They Just Get Deranged
 
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? You never sausage a tragic thing!
 
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? His legacy is a pizza history

Q. Why did the fry cook die during his job interview?
A. The head chef grilled him.

Old burrito chefs never die, they just get smothered.

Did you hear about the old chef who died in a one-car accident? He was diving a souped-up vehicle.

Q. Why did the old Mediteranean chef die in a feta car wreck?
A. He drove right pasta the turnoff and straight off a cliff.

Q. Do old comedian butchers ever die?
A. No, they just go on cutting up.

Q. What happens after old butchers die?
A. They all meat up in the afterlife.

Q. Why did the butcher have to retire?
A. He was cut off in his prime.

Q. Which first course was the chef eating when he suddendly died?
A. Seizure Salad.

Q. Why don't old French chefs ever die?
A. Because they're so roux-ed.

Q. Where do evil Italian chefs go after they die?
A. Al Dente's Inferno.

Q. What happened after an Italian chef was murdered by being boiled to death in an industrial pasta cooker?
A. Police are still trying to al dente-fy a suspect.

Old West cowboy cooks never die. They just bite the dust.

Q. Why did the seasoned old chef retire?
A. He ran out of thyme.

Crusty, ill-tempered baker was a scone's throw from becoming toast.
 
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? Sending olive my prayers to his family!
 
Gorilla Chef Joke: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta way!

Old cake makers never die. They just Bake Off.

Q. How did the old fruit die?
A. It pear-ished.

Q. Why did the old doughnut baker decide tit was time to retire?
A. He was bored with the hole thing.

Q. Why was the old baker in a panic?
A. Because he was in a loaf or death situation.

Old stoner chefs never die because they're already baked.

Old chefs never die, they just boil over.

Q. Why did the old cook at the orphanage die?
A. 'Cause the work was gruel-ing.

Q. Why did the elderly chef finally retire?
A. 'Cause his sage was showing.

Q. Why did the famous old soux chef die while vacationing out at sea?
A. Because there were numerous leeks in his yacht.

Old bread bakers never die, but they do get toasted.

Q. What was the cause of the accidental death of the old Italian chef after the exterminators visit to the kitchen?
A. Pesto-cide.

Q. What did the client say when a psychic told him the spirit of an old Italian chef is haunting his house?
A. I'm not worried because I ainít alfredo no ghost.

Old poultry chefs never die; they just baste away.

Drunken old chefs never die, because they're so stewed.

Q. What show do pastry chefs watch on HBO? A. Game of Scones: All Men Must Die!
 
A guy hit another on the head with a pop bottle, killing him. In court, he said he was influenced by the song "Let's Get Fizzy-Kill."
 
A grenade in a French kitchen results in Linoleum Blown Apart.

Q. Do old Chinese restaurant chefs ever die?
A. No, they just wok away.

Old Japanese cuisine chefs never die, but they do bento-ver backwards.

An old chef took a taxidermist friend to a buffet dinner he'd prepared. By the end of the evening, he was stuffed!

Q. Why did the Mafia take out the Italian chef?
A. Because he was really annoying, and made a pesto himself.

Old dieters never die; they just waist away.

Q. Why don't old canners ever die?
A. Because they're so well-preserved.

Q. Do old seafood chefs ever diet?
A. No, but they do sometimes pull a mussel.

Q. What caused the demise of the old chef?
A. He slipped and broke his prime rib?

Old divers at Casa Bonita Restaurant in Lakewood, Colorado never die. They just belly flop.

Q. Which magician pasta chef miraculously escapes death?
A. Fettu-Genie Alfredo.

Q. What was the Mafia's plot to kill off the old chef?
A. They planned to rig a Tony to explode.

Q. How did the blonde chef die?
A. Fire. She uses the smoke alarm as a timer.

Q. What is the press calling the murder of the chef who was bombarded with 2000 pounds of Chinese soup?
A Wonton Soup Attack.

Q. Why don't busy old French escargot chefs die?
A.'Cause they don't have slime for that.

Ape Chef Says: Smoking will kill you and bacon will kill you, but smoking bacon will cure it!
 
Chimp Chef Asks: Did you hear about the Italian chef injured in a pizza accident? Now, he cannoli do so much!
 
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? His wife is still mourning. Cheese still not over it!

Q. Do old barbeque pit masters ever die?
A. No, but they do get burned out.

Old food critics never die, but they do lose their sense of taste.

Harried old hamburger chefs never die because they put everything else on the back burner.

Q. How did the old BBQ grill chef die?
A. He finally ran out of gas.

Old barbecue chefs never die, but they do get sauced.

Q. Why couldn't the Italian chef get through the Pearly Gates into heaven after he died?
A. He had gnocchi.

Old chefs never die, but they do get braised.

Q. Why don't old vintners ever die?
A. Bevause they just get better and better with age.

Old vintners never really die. They just ferment away.

Old craft brewers never die. They just ride off into the yeast.

Q. What did the cannibal order for lunch?
A. Pizza with everyone on it.

Deadly Funny Foodie Point to Ponder: Did you know that the cannibal hitman prefers take-out food?

Old Mix Masters never die, 'cause they never skip a beat.

Old brewmasters never die. They just ferment away.

Q. Do old cheesemongers ever die?
A. Nah, they just smell that way.

Q. What was the cause of the old yoyo dieter's death?
A. She just waisted away.

Old cream pie bakers never die, but they do get whipped.

The cannibal chef daintily wiped his mouth and said, "My wife makes great soup. I'm really going to miss her."

Did you hear that Dracula collapsed after dining on a guy who ate garlic at the salad bar? Just another victim of Buffet, the Vampire Slayer.

Old refrigerator repairmen never die, they just lose their cool.

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