Q. What do you call a bathroom superhero? A. Flush Gordon!   PainfulPuns.com - Monstrously Funny, Hulking Pun Jokes, Ouch!

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Q. Why is Superman's costume so tight? A. Because it's a size S!
Q. Why is Bruce Wayne so good at baseball? A. Because he's Batman!
Q. What does Spider-Man do for a living? A. He's a Web Designer!
Hulk Asks: What do you call a clip of a macho guy that spreads online? A. A virile video!
Q. What is Magneto's favorite band? A. Metallica!

 


Super Power Humor and Funny Men in Tights
Justice jokes, superhero memes, supervillain laughs, graphic novel humor and bat-tastic puns!

Superhero Jokes, Good Guy Humor, Super Puns
(Because Selfless Real Life Heroes and Super Power Good Guys Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream When Evil Looms!)
Warning: POW! Proceed with Due Caution! The classic battle of Good versus Evil looms ahead. KA-BOOM!
| Superhero Jokes, Caped Crusader Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Supervillain Jokes |
| Superhero Pick-Up Lines | 2 | The Hulk Hookups | Batman Chat Ups | Superman Come-Ons |
| Marvel Comics Jokes | Superhero Music Jokes | Superhero Loo LOLs | 2 | Female Superheroes |
| DC Comics Humor | POW! Batman Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Superman Jokes | Spider-Man Puns |
| Incredible Hulk Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Green Hulk Laughs | Super Chuck Norris Jokes |

Q. What does Batman put into his cocktails? A. Just ice!What is a villain's favorite part of the joke? Batmas answers: The Punch Line!Q. Who's a vampire's favoirite super hero? A. Batman!

Q. Why does Bruce Wayne like all these painful puns?
A. Because they're so batty!

Q. How does Batman take his coffee?
A. Black as the Knight.

Q. What is Batman's favorite beverage?
A. Lemon Aid.

Q. What is Batman's favorite classic weapon?
A. The Bat-tle Axe!

Q. Why is Two Face one of the better comics supervillains?
A. Because he's only half bad.

Q. What song to Marvel-ous villains rock to?
A. Green Goblin Fight by Daniel Pemberton.

Q. Which mouthy, sarcastic high-altitude supervillain resides on Pikes Peak?
A. Sass-quatch!

Supervillain Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, I'm stretchy, just like my spandex suit.

Q. What do you call a horde of zombies dressed as superheroes?
A. The Necro Comic-Con.

Q. What's the difference between Batman's parents and newlyweds from Denmark?
A. One is Wed Danes, and the other is Dead Waynes.

Q. Which supervillain does Batman dread dealing with most?
A. Doctor Death!

Q. Why couldn't Batman go fishing? A. Robin ate all the worms!Q. What would you expect to find in Superman's bathroom? A. The Superbowl!Q. What does Batman say when he needs to cuss somebody out? A. You Batstard!

Q. Where does Batman keep his pet goldfish?
A. In a bat tub!

Q. Why is Bruce Wayne such a great baker?
A. He really knows his batter.

Q. What is Batman's favorite fruit?
A. Nana nana nana nana na banana!

Q. Which Batman movie sequel do rich people hate?
A. Batman and Robinhood.

Batman: I need to find a bathroom.
Robin: What is a hroom?

Did you know that whenever Superman left the toilet seat up, he blamed it on Clark Kent? True story!

Q. Why does Superman have to carry a power converter with him when he's in the USA?
A. Because he's from the DC Universe.

Superman Pick-Up Line: Excuse me miss, I'm from another planet. How about you teach me about human anatomy?

Superman Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, even if there wasn't gravity on Earth, I'd still fall for you.

Q. What happens when Batman sees Catwoman?
A. The Dark Knight rises.

Q. When Batman and Catwoman race, why does Batman always come in first?
A. Because bat is before cat in the dictionary.

Batman Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie, are you Catwoman? 'Cause you're making my Dark Knight rise.

Q. What did Batman give Catwoman on Valentine's Day?
A. Eek! A Mouse!

Q. Why does Batman win at cards? A. Because he always get the Joker!Ouch! Happy Hurts Day!Q. What is Batman's favorite comfort food? A. Alpha-bat soup!

Q. Why did Batman fold and walk out of the poker game?
A. 'Cause they kept saying the Joker was wild.

Q. Why was Batman always so serious?
A. Because he was not the Joker.

Q. Who did Batman take on after conquering the Riddler?
A. Sudoku Man!

Q. Why can't Batman play chess as the white side?
A. Because he always has to be the dark knight.

Q. Why shouldn't you make a legal agreement with Wolverine?
A. Because of his retractable clause.

Q. What happened after Wolverine had a sex change operation?
A. Now he's an Ex-Man.

Q. How do you know Wolverine in the X-Men movies is real?
A. Because he's a huge act, man!

Q. What did Storm say when she saw Wolverine chopping wood?
A. That's a huge axe, man!

Q. What is the difference between a cashier and The Green Lantern?
A. A cashier rings up his charges, but The Green Lantern charges his ring!

Q. Where does Hal Jordan live?
A. In a greenhouse.

Green Lantern Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, just follow the light...

Q. Who is a leprechuan's favorite superhero?
A. The Green Lantern.

Q. Which superhero is Earth's Space Cop?
A. The Green Lantern.

Q. What would you expect to find in Superman's kitchen? A. A Super Bowl!Q. What do you get if you combine Robin and Vita-Mix? A. Robin, the Bloy Blender!WHAM! Happy Wednesday!

Super Power Point to Ponder: If Superman can do it, does that mean Clark Kent?

Q. What does Clark Kent eat ice cream out of?
A. A Super Scooper Bowl.

Q. What do British royals call Superman's fist?
A. The Duke of Kent.

Superman Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you have heat vision too? 'Cause you can melt my heart with just one look.

Q. Which rap song does Metropolis want to beat up?
A. Superman by Eminem.

Super Dude Fact of the Day: In an incredible space-time paradox, Chuck Norris could fight himself, and win!

Super Powerful Trivia: Chuck Norris wears a live rattlesnake as a condom.

Q. Who would be the winner in a fight between Batman and Darth Vader?
A. Chuck Norris.

Today's Super Powerful Trivia: The phrase, Dead Ringer, refers to anybody who sits near Chuck Norris in a movie theater who doesn't turn their cell phone off.

Fitness Point to Ponder: Does Chuck Norris leave potholes when he jogs?

Q. Which are the Human Torch's favorite kinds of candy?
A. Fireballs and Red Hots!

Human Torch Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, I hope you like it hot 'cause I've got a strong urge to get my torch on!

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie, was your daddy the Human Torch? 'Cause you are on fire, Grill!

Human Torch Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, go easy on me 'cause sometimes I burst into flames.

Q. Why does Chuck Norris wear sunglasses?
A. To protect the sun!

| Superhero Jokes, Caped Crusader Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Supervillain Jokes |
| Superhero Pick-Up Lines | 2 | The Hulk Hookups | Batman Chat Ups | Superman Come-Ons |
| Marvel Comics Jokes | Superhero Music Jokes | Superhero Loo LOLs | 2 | Female Superheroes |
| DC Comics Humor | POW! Batman Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Superman Jokes | Spider-Man Puns |
| Incredible Hulk Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Green Hulk Laughs | Super Chuck Norris Jokes |


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