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Hulk Humor: My Zipper Broke, But I Fixed It on the Fly!
Spider-Man Says: Happy Spunday!
What goes "Ha,Ha, Ha, Plop? A man laughing his head off.
Q. Which superhero uses public transportation? A. Bus Lightyear!
Q. What do you call a bathroom superhero? A. Flush Gordon!
Zap! The work week is finally over! Happy Friday!
Hulk Says: Happy? Mad Day!
Enjoy the weekend and have a super souper Sunday!
How do you get holy water? Boil the hell out of it
WHAM! Happy Wednesday!
I didn't like my beard at first, but then it grew on me.
Hulk Asks: Why did the bodybulder go to the hospital? A. Somebody told him he was all cut up!

 


Superhero Jokes, Marvel-ous Puns, Bam! Kapow!
Avenge the Marvel-verse with Pow-erful puns, Incredible humor, and Iron-ic jokes, Man!

Marvel Universe Jokes and Fun Comic Hero Puns
(Because Superhero Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream for Spider-Man, Hulk, Iron Man or Captain America!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! X-Men humor, Electro laughs, Thor jokes, and Wolverine puns ahead.
| Superhero Jokes, Caped Crusader Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Supervillain Jokes |
| Superhero Pick-Up Lines | 2 | The Hulk Hookups | Batman Chat Ups | Superman Come-Ons |
| Marvel Comics Jokes | Superhero Music Jokes | Superhero Loo LOLs | 2 | Women Superheroes |
| DC Comics Humor | POW! Batman Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Superman Jokes | Spider-Man Puns |
| Incredible Hulk Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Green Hulk Laughs | Super Chuck Norris Jokes |


Q. What is it called when Iron Man does a cart wheel? A. A Ferrous Wheel!Q. What does Spider-Man do for a living? A. He's a Web Designer!Hulk Asks: What do you call a clip of a macho guy that spreads online? A. A virile video!

Superhero Pick-Up Poetry in Motion: Iron Man is red, The Hulk is green. You are the hottest babe I've ever seen!

Q. Who actually was the first female superhero?
A. Iron Man is Fe Male!

Q. What is it called if Iron Man breaks his leg despite unbreakable armor?
A. Punny iron-knee.

Q. Why did't Iron Man wear a tuxedo?
A. Because that wasn't his strong suit.

Superhero Point to Ponder: Is Iron Man essentially a Fe-Male?

Q. What do you call Dora the Explorer in an Iron Man suit?
A. FeDora. (Face Palm!)

Q. What does Iron Man order at the Burger King drive-thru?
A. Iron rings.

Iron Man Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, wanna be my Iron Maiden tonight?

Q. What do you call it when Spider-Man joins the Marvel Universe?
A. A spin-off.

Q. Why do Avengers always call Spider-Man when they have online computer problems?
A. Because he's a web developer.

Q. Who accents the sound track in Marvel movies?
A. The Avengers Ensemble.

Q. What do Marvel Avengers and politicans have in common?
A. Both fight among themselves to stay in power!

Q. Why isn't Daredevil an Avenger?
A. Because he doesn't work with Vision.

Q. How do fallen Avengers talk to each other?
A. Snapchat.

Black Widow Pick-Up Line: Hey dude, I think you'll find it shocking when you see just how flexible I can be.

Q. Why was Captain America anemic?
A. Because he wasn't getting enough Iron, Man!

Q. What is the name of the next Marvel movie where Captain America and Iron Man battle Comcast?
A. Avengers Xfinity Wars!

Q. What did Iron Man say to Captain America over the walkie-talkie?
A. Steve, Roger that.

Q. Why was Captain Mexico deported?
A. They feared he wanted to take Captain America's job.

Q. Which superhero won the best vocalist competition?
A. Captain American Idol.

Q. Which superhero routinely spends too much time in the sun?
A. Cap-tan America.

Q. What does Captain America say when he puts together the superhero orchestra?
A. Avengers, ensemble!

Q. Who is Hulk's favorite band? A. Green Day!Q. Who is Thor's favorite rapper? A. MC Hammer!Ouch! Happy Hurts Day!

Q. What do you call a whole clan of superheroes living in the Ozarks?
A. The Inbredibles.

Q. What happened after Iron Man, Thor and The Hulk leave Ikea?
A. Avengers assemble!

Hulking Point to Ponder: Why doesn't Marvel promote The Hulk through advertising, considering he's already a giant Banner?

Incredible Point to Ponder: If The Hulk subbed for Captain America, would he be a Star-Spangled Banner?

Q. Why shouldn't you buy a designer shirt from The Incredible Hulk?
A. Because it's obviously a rip-off!

Q. What did The Hulk say when he saw Wonder Woman?
A. Hulk horny!

Q. How do you apply the new Hulk body wash for bodybuilders?
A. You need to use a Loofa Ringo.

Q. What is The Hulk's favorite band?
A. Smashing Pumpkins.

Q. If your city is overrun by angry, green comic spirits, who you gonna call?
A. Hulk-Busters.

Q. Why did Thor avoid his brother?
A. Because he Odin money.

Q. What is the Avengers favorite day of the week?
A. Thorsday!

Q. Which television show do the daughters of Asgard watch?
A. Hel-Loki-tty.

Q. How does an Avenger browse the Internet?
A. They use a comput-Thor.

Q. What is Tony Stark's favorite movie character?
A. Ferrous Bueller.

Q. What do you call a superhero with a man bun and glasses?
A. A Hips-Thor.

Q. Which superhero writes novels?
A. Au-Thor.

Q. What does Thor always order in a Mexican restaurant?
A. Thor-tillas.

Q. What happened when The Hulk walked into an IKEA store?
A. The Avengers Assembled!

Q. Which superhero is always in a big hurry?
A. Irun Man.

Q. Which superhero always wears the neatest suit?
A. Iron Man.

Q. Why did the wannabe superhero name himself Super Ironic?
A. In case there's super trouble and he's running away, folks will notice him and ask, "Isn't that Ironic?"

Q. What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?
A. Iron Man is a superhero, and Iron Woman is a laundress command.

Q. What did they call Iron Man when he played League of Legends?
A. The Toxic Avenger.

Q. What would you call an alliance between Iron Man and the Silver Surfer?
A. Alloys.

Q. What do you call Iron Man without his suit on?
A. Stark naked!

Q. What does Bruce do to make a hulking good living between Comicons?
A. Banner advertising.

Q. What is Magneto's favorite band? A. Metallica!Hulk Says: Call me Spider-Man because I'm in love with Mary Jane!Q. Who is Electro's favorite singer? Frank Zappa!

Q. Why did the superhero wannbe decide to be Aluminum Man?
A. Because he wanted to foil crime!

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, my metal suit isn't the only reason they call me Iron Man.

Iron Man Pick-Up Line: Hi girl. My name is Tony Stark, and yes, my tower is as impressive as they say it is.

Iron Man Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, why go to the gym, when you can pump iron at my place?

Iron Man Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, my suit is made out of a gold and titanium alloy. Iron refers to something else.

Iron Man Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, you need a room for the night? I'll let you share my suite.

Superhero Point to Ponder: If Xena Warrior Princess and Spider-Man went into business together, would they call it Amazon Web Services?

Q. What happens if you cross Spider-Man with an ear of corn?
A. You get cobwebs!

Q. How does Spider-Man communicate with all his superhero buds?
A. On the World Wide Web.

Q. Which classic toy still fascinates Spider-Man?
A. Toy tops, 'cause they're always spinning.

Q. Which day of the week does horny Spider-Man look forward to?
A. Fly-day.

Spider-Man Pick-Up Line: Hey bae, every tried a sex swing made of spiderwebs?

Q. How do you know Wolverine in the X-Men movies is real?
A. Because he's a huge act, man!

Q. What did Storm say when she saw Wolverine chopping wood?
A. That's a huge axe, man!

Q. Why shouldn't you make a legal agreement with Wolverine?
A. Because of his retractable clause.

Q. What happened after Wolverine had a sex change operation?
A. Now he's an Ex-Man.

Wolverine Point to Ponder: If Wolverine can cut off his dick and it'll just grow back, does that mean he'll never be an Ex-man?

Q. Why was Wolverine fired from the law firm?
A. Because he didn't read the contract's claws.

Once, an invisible man married an invisible woman. Their kids were nothing to lat, too.Q. What is Iceman's favorite band? A. Cold Play!Q. What is Spider-Man's favorite month of the year? A. Web-ruary!

Q. Why is new The Invisible Man movie so super confusing?
A. Because it's very hard to follow.

Q. How many children does the Invisible Man have?
A. None. He's not apparent.

Q. What did the doctor say when the nurse told him there was an invisible man in the waiting room?
A. "Tell him I can't see him now."

Q. How can you get out of going to a superhero themed costume party?
A. Just don't go, and when they question you about why you didn't show up, explain that you were there as the Invisible Man.

Q. Why is Waldo hiding?
A. He doesn't want The Hulk to find him!

Q. Why did graphic novel fans buy so many comic books when the Fantastic Four debuted?
A. To Marvel at them.

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, have you ever seen The Avengers? 'Cause I'd like to introduce you to Thor's hammer.

Thor Pick-Up Line: I may be a god, but girl you are definitely a goddess.

Thor Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, I don't need to summon thunder to light you up!

Thor Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, ever hook up with a Norse god? Hmm, didn't think so.

Q. Which superhero wears a long-sleeved belted robe instead of a cape?
A. Caftan Marvel.

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey bae, I'm gonna do you so hard you'll be Thor tomorrow.

Thor Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, did you know lightning is a million times hotter than the sun?

Thor Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, Mjolnir isn't the only hammer I've got.

Q. Which dance do Ant Man and The Wasp boogie to?
A. The Jitterbug.

Q. Which party game does Ant Man enjoy best?
A. The scAVENGER hunt.

Q. How does Ant Man keep his suit from getting wrinkled?
A. He gets help from Iron Man.

Q. How do Ant Man and the Wasp get around town?
A. They ride the Buzz.

Q. What is the name of Ant Man's musical band?
A. Avengers Ensemble.

Q. Why did Ant Man win a Nobel Prize?
A. Because he was brilli-ant.

Q. Which cartoon superhero reaches his most powerful form during the fall season?
A. Autumn Ant.

Q. What is Spider-Man's favorite band? A. The Spinners!Q. What is the Human Torch's favorite band? A. Arcade Fire!Q. Why did the superhero flush the toilet? A. It was his doody!

Spiderman Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, are you a fly? 'Cause I want to wrap you up and take you to my web.

Q. Why is Spiderman the best outfielder on the superhero baseball team?
A. Because he's great at catching flies.

Spiderman Pick-Up Line: Bae, you must be a bad girl 'cause my spidey senses are tingling south.

Q. Why did Spiderman drive off in his bud's car?
A. He just wanted to go for a quick spin.

Q. Which outdoorsman sport does Spiderman go all out for?
A. Fly fishing.

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, you are the stars on my spangled banner. p

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Decades on ice left my with a lot of catching up to do, so I'd like to start with you.

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Babe, when I saw you, I knew God truly did bless America.

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie, was your daddy the Human Torch? 'Cause you are on fire, girl!

Human Torch Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, go easy on me 'cause sometimes I burst into flames.

Human Torch Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, I hope you like it hot 'cause I've got a strong urge to get my torch on!

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, when I'm done with you, you'll be singing God Bless Captain America.

Superhero Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, if you're Lady Liberty, can I be your Captain America?

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, I have a weapon made of the hardest material on Earth, and I have a shield, too.

Q. Why did Captain America wait so long to carry Thor's hammer?
A. Captain America didn't want to steal his thunder.

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, how about you be my Lady Liberty tonight?

Dr. Doom Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, wanna see what the real Ultimate Nullifier looks like?

Q. Why isn't there ever a Thor in an Avengers tribute performance?
A. Because he doesn't have a Loki-like.

Loki Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, I bet I could penetrate your shield with my scepter.

Loki Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I know a situation where you can come out on top.

Loki Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, my metal tongue is good for more than lying, Care to find out what?

Loki Pick-Up Line: Hey hottie, if I had a star for every time you've brightened my day, I'd have my Milky Way with you.

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, on a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight?

Captain America Come-On: Hey babe, my shield can block anything, but it couldn't stop you from from stealing my heart.

Captain America Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I was frozen for decades. Wanna help warm me up?

| Superhero Jokes, Caped Crusader Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Supervillain Jokes |
| Superhero Pick-Up Lines | 2 | The Hulk Hookups | Batman Chat Ups | Superman Come-Ons |
| Marvel Comics Jokes | Superhero Music Jokes | Superhero Loo LOLs | 2 | Women Superheroes |
| DC Comics Humor | POW! Batman Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Superman Jokes | Spider-Man Puns |
| Incredible Hulk Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | Green Hulk Laughs | Super Chuck Norris Jokes |


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