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Food Pun: I went to the store to buy some soup but, they were out of stock.
How do you get holy water? Boil the hell out of it

Q. Why do chefs worry about an herb shortage? A. Because of the end of thyme!


Soup Jokes, Broth Humor, Soup of the Day Puns
Slurp up bisque puns, hot bouillon humor, chowderhead laughs and souped-up gumbo jokes.

Chowder Jokes, Soup Puns, Consomme Humor
(Because Stock Jokes and Broth Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream When There's a Fly in Your Minestrone!)
Warning: HOT! Spoon Up with Caution! Soup de jour jokes, soupy humor, borscht grins and pea soup puns ahead.
| Soup Jokes, Chowder Puns | Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | Hot Dogs | Condiment Jokes | Herbs |
| Butcher Jokes | Beef Jokes | Pork | Poultry | Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | Barbeque |
| Restaurant Humor | Waiter Jokes | Italian Food | Pizza Jokes | Pasta Puns | Take Out Food |
| Seafood Puns | Pirate Cuisine | Chef Jokes | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Foodie Humor |

I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. Then I had the biggest vowel movement ever today!Notice outside the supermarket: Chicken Soup Is Out Of Stock!Q. What is a vampire's favorite soup? A. Scream of Tomato!

Q. What might happen if you spill a bowl of alphabet soup?
A. That could spell disaster.

Customer: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Force of habit, sir. Our chef used to be a tailor.

Q. What kind of race car did the chef drive?
A. A souped-up vehicle!

Q. What do you call a bunch of rock musicians in a hot tub?
A. Vegetable Soup.

Customer: There's a bee in my alphabet soup!
Waiter: Yes sir, there's also an A, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K...

Q. What is it called when a chef maliciously spills hot broth with dumplings on an obnoxious customer?
A. A Wonton Soup Attack.

Today's Restaurant Special: The conch soup was quite expensive, but the diners were willing to shell out for it.

Q. Why did the chef spill his soup?
A. Because there was a leek in the pot!

Customer: There's a twig in my soup.
Waiter: One moment. I'll get the branch manager.

Customer: Is there soup on the menu today?
Waiter: No sir, I already cleaned it off.

The cannibal daintily wiped his mouth and said, "My wife makes great soup. I'm really going to miss her."

Q. What is a ghost's favorite soup?
A. Scream of chicken!

Customer: There's a fly in my soup.
Waiter: Couldn't be, sir. The chef used them all in the raisin bread.

Soup of the Day Point to Ponder: Do urologists ever order pea soup with a straight face?

Impatient Customer: How long do I have to wait for the turtle soup?
Waiter: Well sir, you do realize turtles are really slow...

Q. What do you get if you cross the man of steel with beef broth? A. Souper-Man!ET Chef Says: I ordered 2000 pounds of Chinese soup. It was Won Ton.Q. What is Batman's favorite comfort food? A. Alpha-bat soup!

'Q. Why won't the Man of Steel eat canned soup?
A. It comes in tin cans.

Waiter Serving Soup: It looks like rain today.
Customer: Yes, but it smells like soup!

Customer: I found a hair in my turtle soup.
Dumb Waiter: Dude, really? That means the turtle and the hare finally got together!

Customer: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup.
Waiter: Yes, sir. Our soup is really hot.

Customer: I cannot eat this soup!
Waiter: Why not? It looks okay to me.
Customer: Because you didn't bring me a spoon!

Customer: Is there soup on today's menu?
Waiter: No, it sold out, so I wiped it off.

Q. What do Jedis order at Chinese restaurants?
A. Pada-wonton soup.

Q. What do you call fake ramen noodles?
A. An im-pasta.

Q. What do you call 2000 pounds of Chinese soup?
A. Won Ton.

Foodie FYI: Inferior dumplings are the sign of wonton neglect.

Did you hear about the Chinese restaurant that was vandalized? It was an act of wonton destruction!

Q. What is it called when you totally ignore your soup dumplings in a Chinese restaurant?
A. Won-ton disregard.

Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup?
Waiter: Learning to read?

Q. What do you call it when a chef runs out of seafood for her famous chowder?
A. A clam-ity!

Customer: I found a ring in my soup.
Waiter: Oh, that must belong to the chef. Let me know if you find his finger.

Q. Did the hyphen chef add pepper to the soup de jour?
A. Yes, but just a dash.

Q. Which soup does a casual vampire chef cook with?
A. Scream of Mushroom.

Q. Why was the top chef's job in jeopardy?
A. His latest soup of the day was a recipe for disaster.

Q. What would you expect to find in Superman's kitchen? A. A Super Bowl!Q. What does Bruce Wayne eat when it's cold outside? A. Alpha-Bat Soup!Q. How do you make a really rich soup? A. Add 14 carats to it!

Q. What do you get if you accidentally spill chicken broth on a comic book?
A. Souperman!

Two cooks had a heated argument, but after they simmered down, they decided to just hash it out.

Customer: Waiter, what is this? Waiter: It's bean soup.
Customer: I don't care what it's been. What is it now?

Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter: Don't worry sir, the spider on your breadsticks will get it.

Q. What does Bruce Wayne enjoy for dinner on a cold winter's night?
A. A bowl of alpha-bat soup.

Q. What is the chance to sample a fishy broth at a high brow music event called?
A. An opera-tuna-ty.

The chef flew into a rage with his new waiter. "Didn't I tell you to notice when the soup boiled over?" The waiter replied, "I did it was at 4:25."

Customer: Waiter, this soup is spoiled. Waiter: Who told you that?
Customer: A little swallow.

Q. How did the food company come up with the best new canned soup recipe?
A. They gathered raw data they could pour over.

Customer: Waiter, there's a dead fly in my tortilla soup.
Waiter: Yeah, they can't handle the spicy jalapenos.

Customer: Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Then why aren't you laughing?

Q. What is the most commonly consumed soup of the day?
A. Coffee.

You might be from Colrado if homemade salsa is the base of your food pyramid!Q. What kind of crackers do firement like in their soup? A. Firecreackers!Gorilla Chef Asks: Where can you expect to find a stirring message? A. In a recipe!

Q. Why did the chef stir parsley into his pureed tomatoes?
A. Because it's soup herb!

Customer: There's a cochroach on my chowder.
Waiter: Yes sir, they don't seem to care what they eat.

Customer: This soup is repeating on me!
Waiter: Great to know. We love repeat business.

Q. Which kind of soup is always on the lam?
A. Split pea soup.

Q. Which 1960s comedian was completely crackers?
A. Soupy Sales.

Q. Why was the chef drowning in a river of tears?
A. He spent hours peeling and dicing onion for a three-gallon pot of onion soup. And then, the clumsy bus boy dumped a tray of dirty dishes into it...

Customer: There's no chicken in this chicken soup!
Blonde Waiter: Duh, there's no horse in the horseradish, either.

Customer: Watch out! Your thumbs are in my soup!
Waiter: Don't worry sir, it's not that hot.

Q. What do you get if you cross the man of steel with chowder?
A. Souperman.

Customer: Waiter, there's a hornet in my soup.
Waiter: Yes sir. It's the fly's day off.

Q. Which soup to-go can be found in the refrigerator in a doctor's office?
A. Pee soup.

Q. What's the difference between popcorn and pea soup?
A. Anybody can pop corn...

Q. Why didn't the chef invest in the gravy market after Thanksgiving?
A. 'Cause there wasn't much stock in it.

Q. Why did the frugal chef go to so many stores to find the best prices for soup herbs?
A. He thought it was thyme well spent.

Blonde Customer: Waiter, there's a hand in my soup.
Waiter: Duh, that's not your soup, that's your finger bowl.

Q. Why did the soup chef quit his job at the chain restaurant?
A. 'Cause the job benefits didn't include stock options.

Q. Why are blondes known for making such great clam soup?
A. Because they're real chowderheads.

Workout Lift of the Day: Why yes, I am into fitness. Fitness this whole soup ladle into my mouth.

Q. How did the Old West goldrush miners make Gold Soup?
A. They added 24 carrots to it.

| Soup Jokes, Chowder Puns | Deli Jokes | Burgers | 2 | 3 | Hot Dogs | Condiment Jokes | Herbs |
| Restaurant Jokes | 2 | 3 | Waiter | Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pizza Jokes | Pasta | Take Out Food |

| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |

| Gourmet Grins | Dinner Jokes | Lunch LOLs | Kitchen Gadget Jokes | Nut Jokes | Old Chef LOLs |
| Butcher Jokes | Steak Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork Jokes | Poultry Puns | BBQ Grill Jokes |
| Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | Seafood Puns | Pirate Eats | Cop Cuisine | Breakfast LOLs |
| Egg Jokes | Milk | Butter | Cheese Jokes | Cheese Gnomes | Ice Cream | Cookie Candy Puns |
| Carrots | Corny Jokes | Peppers | Pickle Puns | 2 | 3 | Potato Puns | Salad | Tomato | Veggies |
| Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon | Orange Puns | Strawberry |
| Baker Jokes | 2 | Bread | Dessert Puns | 2 | Pie | Beverage | Coffee | 2 | Soda | Beer | Wine |
| Snack Jokes | Halloween Treats | Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Sci-Fi Food Jokes | Green Munchies |
| Diet Puns | Gnome Diet | Vegetarian, Vegan Puns | Fitness Dieting Jokes | 2 | Grocery Store |

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Monstrously Funny Puns Work Humor, Joking on the JobPot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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