What did the snooty gourmet chef do when none of the restaurant's
meals impressed him?
A. He made a last dish effort.
guy who recommended this gourmet restaurant to us had no
at Gourmet Restaurant: Why doesn't your menu list the prices?
Waiter: They don't want to make you sick before you've eaten.
How much did the crabby food critic tip the waiter at the
new gourmet restaurant?
A. Two cents.
Waiter, there's a fly in my wine!
Waiter: Yes ma'am, you asked for a house red with a little
body in it.
What do sommeliers think about Painful wine Puns?
A. They're grape. In fact, they are absolutely de-vine!
Which dog breed is preferred by the sommelier?
A. Bordeaux Collie.
What do you call the connoisseur who chooses a suitable
fortified Spanish wine?
A. A Sherry Picker.
What is the name of the dessert with espresso over ice cream?
Customer: Yeah, I can't think of its name, either...
Chef Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you're twice as sweet as Creme
Brulee, and a lot less drippy.
How can you tell if a gourmet French restaurant is haunted?
A. It gives you the crepes.
food critics never die, they just lose their sense of taste.