Q. How do you get a trombonist off your porch? A. Pay hin for the pizza!   PainfulPuns.com - Edible Puns, Funny Food, Chef Humor, Java Jokes!

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Q. Why did the horny rooster go to KFC? A. He heard there's chicken meet up there!
Food Pick-Up Line: Is your body from McDonald's? 'Cause I'm Lovin' It!
Q. What do yu call a Jedi who loves tacos? A. Obi-Juan Kenobi!
Q. Why don't they have toilet paper at KFC? A. It's finger-licking good!

Q. How di Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? A. He forgot to wrap his Whopper!
Ape Chef Asks: What do you call a sleeping pizza? A Pizzzzzza!
Q. Why did McDonald's run out of McNuggets? A. A farmer counted his chickens before they were hatched!
Q. What do uou call a special beverage made for large gatherings? A. Cater-Ade!
Did you see the Will Smith movie about McDonalds? It's called te Pursuit of Happy Meals!


Take Out Food Jokes, Puns To Go, Carry Out Humor
Pick up fast food puns, catered humor, drive thru laughs and quick home delivery jokes.

Drive Thru Jokes and Fast Food Delivery Puns
(Because Fast Food Delivery Jokes ane Take Out Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream If You're Hungry for Laughs!)
Warning: Proceed Quickly! Carry out chicken jokes, hamburger humor to go, and hot pizza delivery puns ahead.
| Take Out Food Jokes | Pizza Jokes | Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pasta Puns | Restaurant | 2 | 3 |
| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |
| Butcher Jokes | Steak Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork Jokes | Poultry Puns | BBQ Grill Jokes |
| Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Mustard and Ketchup Puns | Waiter Jokes |

ET Chef Asks: How are UFOs and White Castle alike? A. Both are unidentified frying objects!Q. How do you reduce wind-drag on a trombonist's car? A. Take the Domino"s Pizza sign off the roof!Q. How did the headless chicken cross the road? A. In a KFC bucket!

Q. What do you call a claim that a guy could eat a Big Mac and a Whopper in two bites?
A. Hard to swallow.

The harried hamburger chef was so worried about the grill, that he put everything else on the back burner.

Q. Which kind of cheeseburger does a baseball player quickly eat at the drive thru window right before a big game?
A. A double.

Did you hear about the hamburger that was robbed and murdered at the drive thru window? First it was rolled, then it was smothered in onions.

Q. How does the man in the moon eat his home delivery hamburgers?
A. On satellite dishes.

Q. What did the cops say when they pulled up at the fast food drive thru pick-up window?
A. Dish is the Police!

When I'm alone and order pizza, I yell "Pizza's Here" so the delivery guy doesn't think I'm a loser.

Laugh Delivery of the Day: I like to party, and by party I mean stay in and order pizza.

Q. What is the difference between a pizza delivery and these pizza puns to go?
A. These pizza puns can't be topped!

Q. What is the difference between a pizza and these pizza puns?
A. Pizza puns deliver a punch line!

Q. What do you call a person who doesn't like pizza to go?
A. A weird-dough!

Q. How does hot delivered pizza introduce itself to you?
A. Slice to meet you!

Pizza Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, I'm just like Domino's. If I don't come in 30 minutes, the next one is free.

Q. What did the hen do when she saw boxed take-out chicken?
A. She kicked the bucket.

Q. What do you need to eat an entire bucket of KFC chicken?
A. Hendurance.

Q. Where did Neanderthals get their fast food chicken?
A. At Cave FC.

Q. Why did KFC hire geneticists to edit chicken DNA?
A. R&D wanted something CRISPR

Q. Who's haunting the KFC across the street from the cemetery?
A. Some comedian spoofing Colonel Sanders said it was a poultry-geist.

Q. Why did the power go out at KFC?
A. Because the circuits were fried.

Fast Food Pick Up Line: Hey Chick, did you just come from KFC? 'Cause your thighs and breast are giving me a drumstick!

Food Pick-Up Line: Do you work at Little Caesars? 'Cause you're hot and I'm ready!Q. What is a vampire's favorite fast food restaurant? A. Murder King!Q. How did the hipster burn his tongue eating pizza? A. He ate it before it was cool!

Q. How is delivered pizza like sex?
A. Even if it's bad, it's still pretty good.

Q. What does your hot and steamy delivered pizza say if it loves you?
A. Fold me close.

Roses are red, pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large, and none of it's for you.

Hot and Ready Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, do you work at Little Caesars? 'Cause you're one fine pizza of ass.

Pizza Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, I'm available for home delivery with or without sausage.

Q. Where do people who have eaten too many Big Macs go in the afterlife?
A. Burger-tory.

Q. Do they serve hamburgers at drive thru windows in Transylvania?
A. Only very rarely.

Q. Do vampires make good Grub Hub burger delivery drivers?
A. No, because they often end up in ghoulash situations!

Q. Why was the greasy hamburger joint allowed to cook its books?
A. There's no accounting for taste!

Hot Pizza puns are all about the delivery!

I like my jokes just like my pizza delivery: extra cheesy!

Customer On the Phone: Will my pizza be long?
Pizzeria Order Taker: No sir, it will be round.

Q. What should you do if you find your delivered Italian pie unappetizing?
A. Give pizza chance!

Q. What is new reality television show set inside a pizza delivery car about?
A. A slice of life.

Q Where do the Borg eat fast food? A. At their local Borger King!ET Chef Says: I ordered 2000 pounds of Chinese soup. It was Won Ton.I'll be Burger King and you're McDonald's. I'll have it my way & you'll be lovin' it!

Q. Why are hamburgers so happy at barbeques?
A. They get to meet all their old flames.

Q. Waiter, is it possible to make a hamburger do the hula at the drive thru window?
A. Yes, order a burger and a shake!

Q. Why did the baseball player quickly eat a hamburger at the drive thru window right before his big game?
A. Because they're great at the plate!

Q. What do cats call mice on skateboards?
A. Meals on Wheels!

Q. What kind of car did the chef drive when he did double duty as a delivery guy?
A. A souped-up vehicle!

Did you hear about the new drive-thru restaurant for golfers? They insist upon putting greens on all their courses!

Q. What did the hungry computer order onliine for lunch carry out?
A. Chips, one byte at a time.

Today's Tasty Point to Ponder: Do long lines at the fast food drive thru window cause wait gain.

Testy Pick Up Lines: Hey there babe, are you on the menu at Mcdonald's, 'cause you're McGorgeous!

Q. Why doesn't McDonald's serve escargot?
A. Snails are not fast food and nobody's got slime for that!

Q. What do polar bears like to pick up for lunch?
A. Ice berg-ers!

Q. How can a carry out hamburger run the mile in under four minutes?
A. Because it's fast food!

Chimp Chef Says: Yowza! It's Taco Tuesday!Q. Why did the man climb to the roof of the fast food restaurant? A. They told him the meal was on the house!Q. Why don't they have toilet paper at KFC? A. Because it's finger-licking good!

Q. Why can't you trust a burrito at a drive thru window?
A. Because it might spill the beans.

Q. What did the take out taco say to the guacamole?
A. Avacado crush on you!

Q. Which Tex-Mex take out food is really small?
A. An inch-ilada.

Car Dining Tip of the Eay: Always eat your tacos over a tortilla. That way when stuff falls out, voila! another taco!

Q. Which Star Wars Jedi orders take out tacos?
A. Obi-Juan Kenobi.

We would deliver another quesadilla joke, but it would be really cheesy...

Fast Bite of the Day: Did you know that hitman prefer take-out food?

Take Out Food Dining Tip of the Day: Never make eye contact with anybody while you're eating a hot dog.

Q. What do hot dog vendors call a phobia of German sausage to go?
A. Fearing the Wurst!

Q. Why do all fast food hot dogs look the same when you unwrap them for lunch at home?
A. Because they are in bread.

Q. How do you make the cashier at the frankfurter shop pick up window laugh?
A. Tell him a Polish sausage joke.

Q. What is the prize in the hot dog eating contest?
A. Wiener takes all!

Q. What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor?
A. Make me one with everything.

Q. Why do bulimics get take out food at KFC?
A. Because the chicken comes in a handy bucket.

Q. Is it proper to eat take out fried chicken with your fingers?
A. No, fingers should be eaten separately!

Q. How can you tell if take out chicken wings are virgins?
A. They are not if they have the bone in.

Q. What happened before the young chef was hired as a fry cook at KFC?
A. The assistant manager grilled him.

Q. What should you do if you don't like the corn you brought home from KFC?
A. Blame the Kernel.

Q. Why did the rooster go to KFC?
A. He wanted to see chickens strip.

Fast Food Cook Pick Up Line: Hey bae, you have more legs than this bucket of KFC.

Q. Where does Jabba prefer to eat? A. Pizza Hutt!Q. What is a pirate's favorite restaurant? A Arrrby's!Q. Why did the French fry win the race? A. Because it was fast food!

Q. What did the donut say to the pizza at Pizza Hut?
A. If I had as much dough as you, I wouldn't hang around this hole.

Q. What does an aardvark like on his pizza to go?
A. Ant-chovies!

Q. Why did the crusty old pizza delivery guy open up his own a pizzeria?
A. He heard the dough was good.

Q. What is an Arby's take outr roast beef sandwich lover's favorite song lyric?
A. Is it meat you're looking for?

Q. What do you call a claim that a hungry man could eat an Arby's sandwich at the drive thru window in just one minute?
A. Hard to swallow.

Q. Why did the skeleton order a restaurant food delivery meal?
A. To get a spare rib.

Vegetarian Point to Ponder: Will McDonald's beef up their menu with a new veggie burger?

Q. What do you call a pig thief who steals your lunch?
A. A Hamburglar.

Q. What happens when two hamburgers fall in love?
A. They live together in holy meatrimony!

Q. If Burger King married Dairy Queen, where would they live? A. White Castel!Chimp Chef Asks: Which kind of pizza do potheads prefer? A. Stone-Baked!Q. Where are the best tacos served? A. In the Gulp of Mexico!

Q. Are fast food hamburgers male or female?
A. Male, because they are boygers, not grillgers.

Q. What is it called when customers have to wait an eternity in the hanburger joint drive thru line?
A. Burger-tory.

Q. Where does a burger take a quick nap before it goes out the pick up window?
A. On a bed of lettuce!

Did you hear about the hamburger comedian who told really funny drive thru window jokes? He was really on a roll!

Q. Why did the new gourmet burger restaurant owner personally deiver lunch to the warehouse staff?
A. He heard they have good pallets.

Q. Which kind of pizza do you
have delivered on Christmas eve? A. Cheeses Crust.

Q. How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?
A. Remove the pizza delivery sign.

Q. What do you call a pizza delivery with only one slice of sausage on it?
A. A Pepper-lonely Pizza!

Q. How can you tell if a customer orderg a pizza for delivery is Buddhist?
A. He says, "Om, make me one with everything."

Did you hear that Domino's Pizza is now on the moon? Great food, but no atmosphere.

Cheesy Pizza Jokes To Go: They're all about delivery.

Q. Why don't skeletons like take out tacos?
A. 'Cause they just don't have the stomach for it.

Q. What is the name of the crazy fun new Mexican restaurant that does home delivery in east-central Texas?
A. Waco Taco.

Q. What is the slogan at the new Mexican restaurant to promote its home delivery service?
A. Seven days without a taco makes one weak.

Q. What is a penguin's favorite Tex-Mex take out dish?
A. A brrr-ito!

We'd deliver one last tortilla joke, but it would be really corny.

| Take Out Food Jokes | Pizza Jokes | Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pasta | Restaurant | 2 | 3 | Waiter |
| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |
| Butcher Jokes | Steak Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork Jokes | Poultry Puns | BBQ Grill Jokes |
| Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup |
| Gourmet Grins | Dinner Jokes | Lunch LOLs | Kitchen Gadget Jokes | Nut Jokes | Old Chef LOLs |
| Carrot Jokes | Corn | Peppers | Pickle Puns | 2 | 3 | Potato Puns | Salad | Tomato | Veggies |
| Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | Seafood Puns | Pirate Eats | Cop Cuisine | Breakfast Jokes |
| Dessert Jokes | 2 | Pie Puns | Baker | 2 | Bread | Beverage | Coffee | 2 | Soda | Beer | Wine |
| Cookie Candy Puns | Ice Cream | Milk | Butter | Cheese Jokes | Cheese Gnomes | Egg Jokes |
| Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon | Orange Puns | Strawberry |
| Snack Jokes | Halloween Treats | Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Sci-Fi Food Jokes | Green Munchies |
| Diet Puns | Gnome Diet | Vegetarian, Vegan Puns | Fitness Dieting Jokes | 2 | Grocery Store |

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