Q. What does a skeleton say before dinner? A. Bone Appetit   PainfulPuns.com - Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes, Deadly LOL!

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Q. What is a vampire's favorite fruit? A. A Nectarine!
Q. What did the vampire have for dessert? A. Whine and I Scream!
Q. What's a vampire's favorite drink? A. A Bloody Mary!
Q. Which ice cream flavor is a vampire's favorite? A. Vein-illa!
Q. What is a vampire's favorite fast food restaurant? A. Murder King!
Q. What does a vampire on a diet drink? A. Blood Light!
Q. What do you call a vampire who lives in the kitchen? A. Count Spatula!

 


Halloween Treat Jokes & Funny Trick or Treats
4 out of 5 goblins fear scary joke treats, frightful trick or treat humor, and funny distasteful puns.

Halloween Jokes, Trick or Treat Humor, Treat Puns
(Because Candy-Coated Jokes and Sweet Puns Are Mainstream, But There Could Never Be TOO Many Snickers!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Killer candy jokes, inedible puns, and hellish treats lie dead ahead.
| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |

Q. Where do monsters get their cookies? A. From the Ghoul Scouts!Q. What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween? A. Candy Cornea!Q. What is a ghoul's favorite cheese? A. Monster-Ella!

Q. What does a girl witch use to bake Halloween cookies?
A. An Easy Bake Coven.

Q. How fast did the monster eat his Halloween lunch?
A. He bolted it down.

Q. What did the cannibal say when he was full after trick or treating?
A. I can't eat another mortal.

Q. What does the Italian restaurant serve on Halloween?
A. Fettucinni Afraid-o!

Q. Why wasn't there any food left after the Halloween party?
A. Because everyone there was a goblin.

Q. What do you call stolen Halloween candy?
A. Hot Chocolate!

Q. Why don't skeletons like spicy tacos?
A. 'Cause they just don't have the guts for it.

Q. What do you call haunted yogurt?
A. Paranormal Activia.

Q. What is a Halloween retreat?
A. A second piece of candy.

Q. Why did the monster pour nacho cheese all over people's feet on Halloween?
A. He was hungry for Dori-toes.

Q. Why did the mommy monster tell her child not to eat uranium?
A. So he wouldn't get atomic-ache.

Q. Who's haunting the KFC across the street from the cemetery?
A. Some comedian spoofing Colonel Sanders said it was a poultry-geist.

Q. What do birds hand out on Halloween?
A. Tweets.

Q. What kind of dessert does a ghoul like? A. Ice scream!Q. What do ghosts eat for dinner? A. S-Boo-Ghetti!Q. Why didn't the skeleton like the Halloween candy? A. He just didn't have the stomach for it!

Q. Why did Dracula run out of the Italian restaurant?
A. They put garlic on his pizza.

Q. What do skeletons give out to trick or treaters on Halloween?
A. Spare ribs.

Q. How can you tell if a French restaurant is haunted?
A. It gives you the crepes.

Q. What is a zombie's favorite holiday beverage?
A. Egg noggin.

Q. What do they serve at the monster school cafeteria?
A. Human beans, broiled legs, pickled bunions and eyes cream.

Q. What do zombie college students eat?
A. Raw-men.

Q. Why did a girl ghost go on a diet after Halloween?
A. She wanted to keep her ghoulish figure.

Did you hear about the cannibal scientist who perfected cloning? Now, he's full of himself.

Q. What do skeletons say before they eat?
A. Bone Appetite.

Q. What is a skeleton's favorite fruit?
A. Spineapple.

Q. What does a mommy cannibal say to the kids at the Halloween dinner table?
A. Don't talk with somebody in your mouth.

Q. What is a monster's Halloween slogan?
A. Eat, drink, and be scary!

Q. What's a ghost pirate's favorite drink?
A. Boo Tea.

Q. What do you eat for lunch on a haunted beach? A. A Sand-Witch!Q. What is a ghost's favorite dessert? A. Booberry pie!Q. Where do ghosts buy their food? A. At the ghost-ery store!

Q. How can you tell if a witch is on a diet?
A. All her food is potion-controlled.

Q. Which side dish do monsters eat with a sandwich?
A. Ghoul-slaw.

Q. How did the zombie die?
A. Somebody threw him a green Lifesaver.

Q. What do you call recurrent dreams about an ancient Egyptian mummy attacking you while you're cooking?
A. Rameses Kitchen Nightmares.

Q. Which kind of pie is the favorite of ghosts in Australia?
A. Boo Meringue.

Q. What is a ghoul's favorite fruity flavor?
A. Lemon slime.

Q. What kind of breakfast cereal do monsters like most?
A. Ghost-Toasties.

Q. What is a cannibal's favorite food?
A. Baked Beings.

Q. When do monsters eat breakfast?
A. In the moaning.

Q. How monsters like their eggs cooked on Halloween?
A. Terror-fried!

Q. Is it possible to kill a Halloween monster by throwing eggs at him?
A. Yes, that is called egg-stermination!

Q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch in the desert?
A. A Ham Sandwitch.

Q. How did the trick-or-treaters feel after eating so much candy? A. Fright-full!Q. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? A. Pumpkin Pi!Q. What do ghouls eat for supper? A. Spook-etti!

Q. What does a skeleton order at a restaurant on Halloween?
A. Spareribs.

Q. Which day do monsters eat people?
A. ChewsDay!

Q. What do you call a sick monster who puts poison in the corn flakes?
A. A cereal killer.

Q. What did the skeleton order at the Halloween buffet?
A. Scare ribs.

Q. What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A. A sour puss.

Q. What is a monster's favorite refreshing Halloween party beverage?
A. Demon-ade.

Q. Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner?
A. For exceeding the feed limit.

Q. What is a skeleton's favorite Thanksgiving side dish?
A. Grave-y.

Q. What killer round did the zombie order at the bar on Halloween?
A. A shot of ta-kill-ya, a Bloody Mary, and a Mind Eraser!

Q. What do you call a guy who is absolutely fed up with people on Halloween?
A. A cannibal.

Q. What do monsters eat at October barbeques?
A. Hallo-weenies!

Q. What do young female monsters do at parties?
A. They look for edible bachelors!

Q. How much does it cost to keep a zombie well fed?
A. An arm and a leg.

Q. What kind of food do mummies like at Halloween parties?
A. Wraps.

Q. Which kind of coffee do mummies prefer on Halloween?
A. De-coffin-ated.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite fruit? A. Booberries!Q. What do you get if you cross a witch with sand? A. A sandwich!Q. What is a vampire's favorite soup? A. Scream of Tomato!

Q. Why did ghosts go to a bar on Halloween?
A. For the boos!

Q. Why should a skeleton drink eight glasses of milk per day?
A. They say it's good for the bones.

Q. Who wrote the scary new cookbook, I Am The Evil Child?
A. May I. Butcher.

Q. Why are ghosts so popular at Halloween parties?
A. 'Cause they always bring the boos!

Q. Where do people who have eaten too many Big Macs go in the afterlife?
A. Burger-tory.

Witch Tip of the Day: Nobody likes spoiled children, so be sure to use airtight containers on Halloween.

Q. What does a witch's cat like for breakfast?
A. Mice Crispies.

A guy walks into a graveyard bar and asks the bartender for a beer. Bartender replies, "Sorry, we only serve spirits here."

Q. What do bratty Daleks do to houses with inferior Halloween treats?
A. Eggsterminate!

Q. What does Dracula like for dessert?
A. Leeches and scream.

First Monster: Am I late for dinner?
Second Monster: Yes, everyone's been eaten.

Q. Where does a mummy drink his espresso?
A. At the Sar-Coffee-Gus.

Q. Where do skeletons like to eat at the mall?
A. Cinnabone.

Q. What does the Loch Ness monster eat?
A. Fish and ships.

| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |
| Scary Funny Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Scary Pick-Up Lines |
| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Daily Jokes | Old Never Die Jokes | Chilling Winter Humor |

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| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal Puns | Sports Puns | Superhero Jokes | Travel Jokes | Weather Jokes | Weed Jokes |

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