Q. What are a ghoul's favorite rides at the amusement park? A. The scary-go-round and roller ghoster!   PainfulPuns.com - Frightful Puns, Scary Jokes, Deadly LOL!

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Q. What is a ghoul's favorite game on Halloween? A. Hide-and-ghost-seek!
Q. What do moms dress up as on Halloween? A. Mummies!
Q. Which ghoul is the best dancer? A. The boogie man!
Q. Wht did one owl say to another? A. Happy Owl-ween!
Q. Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school? A. His heart wasn't in it!

 


Deadly Funny Puns and Halloween One-Liners
4 out of 5 werewolves devour scary jokes, eerie humor howls, and hairy funny Halloween puns.

Scary Jokes, Halloween Humor, Killer Puns
(Because Frightful Ghoul Jokes, Spooky Humor, and Deadly Puns Are NOT Mainstream Enough on Halloween!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Killer Halloween jokes, deadly humor, and furry funny puns lie dead ahead.
| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |

Q. What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost? A. Bam-Boo!Q. Why didn't the skeleton like the Halloween candy? A. He just didn't have the stomach for it!Q. Why do ghosts like to ride in elevators? A. It raises their spirits!

Q. What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
A. One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!

Q. What do baby ghosts wear on Halloween?
A. White pillow cases.

Q. What does a mother ghost tell her kid before going trick or treating?
A. Put on your boos and shocks.

Q. Which day of the week do ghosts look forward to?
A. MoanDay.

Q. Why are skeletons so calm?
A. Because nothing gets under their skin.

Q. What do skeletons give out on Halloween?
A. Spare ribs.

Q. How do skeleton traffic reporters prefer to commute?
A. By skel-icopter.

Q. Why are skeletons the original Halloween hipsters?
A. Because they've been coming out of the closet since before it was cool.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite Halloween game?
A. Hide-and-ghost-seek.

Q. What did the ghost's daughter want for her birthday?
A. A haunted dollhouse.

Q. Why are ghosts so popular at Halloween parties?
A. 'Cause they always bring the boos!

Q. How much did the psychic know about the spirits inhabiting the haunted house?
A. A medium amount of information.

Q. Why did the skeleton cross the road? A. To get to the body shop!Q. Which is the most important subject in witch school? A. Spelling!Q. What did the skeleton say when the ghost lied to hin? A. I can see right through you!

Q. Why don't skeletons like Halloween parties?
A. They have no body to dance with.

Q. What do you call a skeleton that stays out in sub-zero weather too long?
A. A Numbskull.

Q. Do monsters enjoy Halloween skeleton jokes?
A. Yes, they find them quite humerus.

Q. Who is the most famous French skeleton?
A. Napoleon Bone-apart.

Q. What do you call two witches who share an apartment?
A. Broom mates!

Q. Which song is played in covens on Halloween?
A. Season of the Witch by Donovan.

Q. What does a witch get if she crosses a black cat and a lemon?
A. A sour puss.

Q. What do you call a witch who landed in poison ivy?
A. An Itchy Witchy.

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the hospital?
A. To have his ghoul stones removed.

Q. Which kind of plates do skeletons prefer?
A. Antique bone china.

Q. Why are skeletons good at chopping down trees?
A. They're Lumbar-jacks!

Q. What is a skeleton's weapon of choice?
A. A bone and marrow.

A skeleton walks into a bar on Halloween and says, "I'd like two beers and a mop."

Q. Who did Frankenstein take to the dance? A. His ghoul friend!Q. What kind of dessert does a ghoul like? A. Ice scream!Q. What do you call interns at a cemetery? A. Grave trainees!

Q. What did Dr. Frankenstein say after the monster spit on him?
A. It's saliva!

Q. Which tree monster grows in the forest?
A. Frankenpine.

Q. Why did Frankenstein go to the doctor?
A. He was feeling a little stiff, over all.

Q. What game do kid zombies play on Halloween?
A. Corpse and Grave Robbers!

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the Halloween speed dating party?
A. He was hoping to pick up some body!

Q. Where do skeletons like to eat at the mall?
A. Cinnabone.

Q. Why did the French chef fired from the Halloween-themed restaurant?
A. Because he gave the diners the crepes.

Q. Which day do monsters eat people?
A. ChewsDay!

Q. Who wrote the right-handed zombie book, All That's Left of Me?
A. Mai Ra Maines.

Q. What kind of appetizers do zombies like at Halloween parties?
A. Finger foods.

Q. What do you call zombies that can't run?
A. The Walking Dead!

Q. What do you call a creepy pervert in a Halloween haunted house?
A. A peek-a-boo!

Q. Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? A. He didn't have the guts!Q. What do you get if you cross a witch with sand? A. A sandwich!Eddy Munster Says: Mommy, everybody says I look like a werewolf? Oh, sit down and comb your face!

Q. Why should a skeleton drink eight glasses of milk per day?
A. They say it's good for the bones.

Q. What does a French skeleton call his buddies?
A. Bone Ami.

Q. Which creepy gothic tune do powerful old people moan about?
A. We Suck Young Blood by Radiohead.

Q. Why did the cemetery caretaker have to call a locksmith?
A. Because the old skeleton key was lost.

Q. Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her Halloween travels?
A. She heard they had great broom service!

Q. How does a scary hag tell time?
A. She looks at her witch watch.

Witch Tip of the Day: Nobody likes spoiled children, so be sure to use airtight containers on Halloween.

Q. What hobby do witches enjoy in their spare time?
A. Witch Crafts.

Q. Which classic rock musician is immune to a werewolf attack on Halloween?
A. Warren Zevon.

Q. How did the mummy know it was time to retire?
A. He saw the writing on the wall.

Q. What kind of underwear does a mummy wear on Halloween?
A. Fruit of the Tomb!

Q. Why were the two flatulent Egyptian archeaologists such good friends?
A. That had loud toots-in-common.

| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |
| Scary Funny Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Scary Pick-Up Lines |
| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Daily Jokes | Old Never Die Jokes | Chilling Winter Humor |

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