Did you hear about the fight in the kitchen? A fish got battered!   PainfulPuns.com - Edible Puns, Funny Food, Chef Humor, Java Jokes!

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Q. Why does a chef give his lady pastry on Valentine's Day? A. He cannoli love her!
Q. Why do chefs worry about an herb shortage? A. Because of the end of thyme!
Gorilla Chef Says: Preparing for the Labor Day cookout was a Lot of Work!
Chimp Chef Asks: What happens when you fall in love with a French chef? A. you get buttered up!

 


Chef Puns, Gourmet Jokes, Cooking Humor
Gobble up funny cook jokes, half-baked chef puns, and scrumptious gourmet kitchen laughs.

Delicious Chef Humor, Cook Jokes, Foodie Puns
(Because Famously Funny Cooking Jokes Could Never Be Mainstream Enough For Casual Kitchen Cooks!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Over-cooked humor and dry food LOLs may cause excessive thirst for chef puns.
| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes, Culinary Beats | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons |
| Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pasta Puns | Restaurant Jokes | 2 | 3 | Pirate Cuisine | Seafood Puns |
| Butcher Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork Puns | Poultry | Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | BBQ |
| Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup |

Why can't chefs play baseball? Because they always get caught trying to steal the basil!Stir Fry Cooks Come From All Woks of LifeQ. What is a sous chef's favorite song? A. Dice Dice Baby!

Q. Which baseball player makes the best pancake chef?
A. The batter.

Q. What do baseball players eat at White Castle?
A. Sliders.

Q. Why are so many baseball umpires over-weight?
A. Because they always clean the plate.

Q. What do you call a fake ramen noodle?
A. An im-pasta.

Q. Which chef wrote the book, Sweet 'N Sour Asian Recipes?
A. Terry Ah Key.

Q. What happened before the young chef was hired as a fry cook?
A. The head chef grilled him.

Culinary Point to Ponder: Can student chefs learn their trade in the Cook Islands?

Q. What do the locals call their five-star Lakota cook?
A. A Sioux Chef!

Did you hear about the chef who was a-maize-ing at making corny jokes? His puns were very cheesy.

Q. What music do chefs listen to while stir frying?
A. Wok 'n Roll.

Q. Why did the chef spill his soup?
A. Because there was a leek in the pot!

Q. How much do restaurant patrons enjoy the chef's trendy new all-you-can eat buffet?
A. To the fullest.

ET Chef Says: I ordered 2000 pounds of Chinese soup. It was Won Ton.Q. What is a chef's favorite dystopian movie? A. The Hunger Games!Chimp Chef Asks: How do you shop for just the right knife? A. Keep a sharp lookout!

Q. What is it called when a chef maliciously spills hot broth with dumplings on an obnoxious customer?
A. A Wonton Soup Attack.

Q. Why do women especially love Chinese food?
A. Because Won Ton spelled backward is Not Now!

Q. Why did the chef decide to buy the break-resistant dinnerware?
A. Because it had a good crack record.

Q. Which Disney movie was about a chef?
A. James and the Giant Quiche.

Q. Which HBO show do pastry chefs like?
A. Game of Scones: All Men Must Die!

Did you hear about the new movie about the Atkins Diet? It's called, "Dude, Where's My Carbs?"

Chef's Special of the Day: The conch soup was quite expensive, but the diners were willing to shell out for it.

Q. What did one knife say to another knife?
A. Look Sharp!

Q. What is the favorite tune of the wannabe fast order cook?
A. I Believe I Can Fry.

Did you hear about the chef who slipped and broke his prime rib?

Q. What did the lunch buffet at the chef author's conference feature?
A. A table of contents.

Gorilla Chef Asks: What runs but doesn't get anywhere? A. A refrigerator!Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? Sending olive my prayers to his family!Ape Chef Asks: Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? How sad he ran out of thyme!

Q. Where do witches bake their cookies?
A. In a coven.

Q. Why did the guy quit his job at the cookie factory?
A. Because it was a really crumby place to work.

Customer: There's a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Force of habit, sir. Our chef used to be a tailor.

Spicy Chef's Pick-Up Line: Hey there, you cumin here often?

Q. What did the head chef say to chew out the new guy?
A. This duck is so raw that it's still trying to sell me life insurance!

Q. Why did the disgruntled hot dog vendor quit his job?
A. He just didn't relish it.

Did you hear about the great chef who put much thyme into learning his craft in Amsterdam? He calls it his "Holland Days."

Q. How do you know if an Italian chef loves you?
A. He steals a pizza your heart.

Q. What does it take to be a great chef?
A. It boils down to beating the other chefs to the cutting edge recipes.

ET Chef Asks: Why did the blonde chef shave the peaches? A. Because the recipe called for nectarines!Gorilla Chef Asks: Why did the poor man sell yeast? A. To raise some dough!Chimp Chef Asks: What is a stoner chef's specialty? A. Baked Ziti!

Chef Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, you remind me of my spice cabinet because you've got a fine grind goin' on!

The blonde thought she only had enough flour for one loaf, but after adding yeast, she had elevened bread. Duh!

Point That Health Food Chefs Ponder: Why isn't thyme used in medicine? After all, thyme heals all wounds.

Did you hear about the restaurant critic who had no taste?

Q. Why was the top chef's job in jeopardy?
A. His latest creation was a recipe for disaster.

Q. Why do great chefs use butter?
A. Because there is no margarine for error.

Q. Where do cowboy chefs that spcialize in cooking beef feel right at home?
A. On the range.

Q. What happened when the pastry chef's wife came home early?
A. She caught him master baking.

Q. Why did the elderly chef finally retire?
A. 'Cause his sage was showing.

The famous chef did not use that herb from a laurel tree in his recipes, contrary to popular bay leaf.

A chef's girlfriend bet him a hundred dollars that he couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should've seen the look on her face when he drove pasta.

Did you hear about the punny chef who was know for his antics and capers?

| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |
| Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pasta Puns | Restaurant Jokes | 2 | 3 | Pirate Cuisine | Seafood Puns |
| Butcher Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork | Poultry | Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | BBQ |
| Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup |
| Egg Jokes | Milk | Butter | Cheese Jokes | Cheese Gnomes | Ice Cream | Cookie Candy Puns |
| Carrot Jokes | Peppers | Pickle Puns | 2 | 3 | Potato Puns | Salad | Tomato Jokes | Veggies |
| Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon | Orange Puns | Strawberry |
| Baker Jokes | 2 | Bread | Dessert Puns | 2 | Beverage | Coffee | 2 | Soda Funny | Beer | Wine |
| Snack Jokes | Halloween Treats | Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Sci-Fi Food Jokes | Green Munchies |
| Diet Puns | Gnome Diet Jokes | Vegetarian Jokes, Vegan Puns | Fitness and Dieting Jokes | 2 |


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