Gorilla asks: Why did the banana go to a hair stylist? A. It had split ends!   PainfulPuns.com - Edible Puns, Funny Food, Chef Humor, Java Jokes!

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Chimp asks: What do you call two banana skins? A. A pair of slippers!
Crow Chef Says: Baby, if you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple!
ET Chef Asks: Why did the blonde chef shave the peaches? A. Because the recipe called for nectarines!
Banana Joke: What do ou dod if you see a blue banana? A. Try to cheer it up!

 


Fruit Puns, Sweet Orchard Humor, Ripe Jokes
Pick from a bounty of berry sweet jokes, a-peeling puns, and ripe humor you'll find zesty.

Juicy Fruit Jokes, Zesty Humor, Funny Fruits
(Because Organic Fruit Fights Could Never Be TOO Mainstream in the Produce Aisle or School Cafeteria!)
Warning: Pro-Seed with Caution! Funny fruit puns may cause grove laughter and attract birds or fruit flies.
| Ripe Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon Jokes | Orange Puns |
| Juicy Strawberry Jokes | Baker Puns and Bakery Jokes | 2 | Sweet Dessert Puns | 2 |
| Beverage Humor | Coffee Jokes | 2 | Soda Funny Puns | Beer Jokes | Wine Lover Laughs |

Chimp asks: Why couldn't the banan yell HI? A. It could only YELLOW!An Orange Asks: Orange you glad you saw this pun?Q. What do you do if ife gives you melons? A. See a doctor, because you're dyslexic!

Q. Why do monkeys love bananas?
A. Because they have a-peel!

Q. Why was the ice cream social canceled?
A. Because all the bananas split!

Roses are red, berries are blue, oranges are orange, and that's why they're cool!

Q. What did one orange ask another orange?
A. Do you speak Mandarin?

When life gives you lemons, just find somebody with salt and tequila!

Sign at Plastic Surgery Clinic: If life gives you lemons, we can give you melons.

Q. What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon? A. Pork Rinds!Q. What is a cool banana's favorite song? A. Melllo Yellow!Q. How do you make an apple turnover? A. Ross it down hill!

Q. What do you get if you cross a watermelon with brocolli?
A. Meloncholy!

A watermelon rolls on into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be?" Watermelon replies,"A rum and cuke please."

Q. What does a banana holler from a mountain top?
A. "Yellow down there!"

Q. What is a banana's favorite pick-up line?
A. Yellow, You!

Q. Why did the apple stop in the middle of the road?
A. It ran out of juice!

Q. Why did the deep dish apple pie cross the road?
A. It saw a fork ahead!

Q. Why don't bananas ever get lonely? A. Because they hang out in bunches!Q. Why was the lemon feeling depressed? A. It lost its zest for life!Why were the little strawberries upset? Because their parents were in a jam!

Q. What is the easiest way to make a banana split?
A. Cut it in half.

Q. What did the pastry chef say when a banana cream pie he made completely satisfies a tyrannical ruler?
A. It hit despot.

Q. Why did the lemon go to the doctor?
A. It had a sour stomach.

Q. Why did the guy lose his job at the lemonade company?
A. He just couldn't concentrate!

Did you hear about the cantaloupe's funeral? It was a very meloncholy ceremony.

Q. How do you fix a broken strawberry?
A. With a strawberry patch.

Q. How do you make a strawberry shake?
A. Put it in the freezer! Brr, that was cold!

Q. Why was the strawberry all by itself?
A. Because the banana split.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite dessert? A. Booberry pie!Q. What is an orange's least favorite day of the week? A. Juice Day!Q. Which fruit do sheep enjoy most? A. Baaaa-nanas!

Q. Which kind of fruit pie is the favorite of ghosts in Australia?
A. Boo Meringue.

Q. Which kind of citrus fruit do sailors like best?
A. Navel oranges.

Q. What does an orange sweat when it works out at the gym?
A. Orange juice.

Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.

Q. How do you catch King Kong?
A. Hang upside down and make a noise like a banana!

Q. Why did the lemon hide from the bully?
A. Because it was yellow.

Q. What did the strawberry say to his lady on Valentine's Day? A. I love you berry much!A raisin wined about not acheiving grapeness.Q. What do weirdos and Christmas have in common? A. Furitcake!

Q. Why did the strawberry get so many Valentines?
A. Because it was so sweet.

Q. Why don't strawberries drive?
A. Because they always end up in traffic jams!

Q. What resembles half of a strawberry?
A. The other half.

Q. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road?
A. He ran out of juice.

Sure, I heard it through the grape vine...

Q. Why did the blonde go to the bank wanting to swap 100 grapes for 50 raisins?
A. Because she wasn't sure about the currant exchange rate.

Q. What can you do with stale fruit cake?
A. Fruit cake can't get an more stale than it was in the first place!

Did you hear about the baker who made fair fruitcake? He was one slice short of a loaf.

If IFs and BUTs were candy and nuts, we'd all have fruitcake for Christmas.

| Fruit Humor | 2 | 3 | Apple Jokes | Banana Funs | 2 | 3 | Lemon | Orange Puns | Strawberry |
| Baker Jokes | 2 | Dessert Puns | 2 | Beverage Humor | Coffee | 2 | Soda Funny | Beer | Wine |
| Chef Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Chef Tunes | Gnome Chef Jokes | Chef Come-Ons | Foodie Humor |
| Restaurant Jokes | 2 | 3 | Italian Food | 2 | 3 | Pizza Jokes | Pasta Puns | Take Out Food |
| Butcher Jokes | Steak Jokes | Beef Jokes | 2 | Pork Jokes | Poultry Puns | BBQ Grill Jokes |
| Deli Jokes | Burger Puns | 2 | 3 | Hot Dog LOLs | Ketchup Jokes, Mustard Puns | Herb | Soup |
| Colorado Cuisine | Tex-Mex Jokes | Seafood Puns | Pirate Eats | Cop Cuisine | Breakfast Jokes |
| Egg Jokes | Milk | Butter | Cheese Jokes | Cheese Gnomes | Ice Cream | Cookie Candy Puns |
| Carrot Jokes | Peppers | Pickle Puns | 2 | 3 | Potato Puns | Salad | Tomato Jokes | Veggies |
| Snack Jokes | Halloween Treats | Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Sci-Fi Food Jokes | Green Munchies |
| Diet Puns | Gnome Diet Jokes | Vegetarian Jokes, Vegan Puns | Fitness and Dieting Jokes | 2 |


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You've lasted 'til harvest time, so here's even more ripe laughter,
tasty humor, juicy jokes and zesty painful puns that'll sweeten your day:

More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

| Blonde Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Daily Puns | Flower Jokes | Ghost Jokes | Haunting Jokes | Hipster Humor |
| Jokes About Jokes | Man Jokes | Monkey Jokes | Monster Laughs | Music Jokes | Psychic Puns | Sci-Fi Jokes |
| Seasonal Puns | Sheep Jokes | Shrink Jokes | Sports Jokes | Travel Jokes | Valentine Jokes | Weed Jokes |

Garden Puns, Green Groaners Bartender Puns, Bar Humor Painful Puns, Punny Funs
Pet Puns + Jokes = Funny Pet PeevesHoliday Puns, Silly Seasonal JokesClucking Funny Farm Animal Puns

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