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Q. What is a vampire's favorite soup? A. Scream of Tomato!
Q. What is a vampire's favorite fast food restaurant? A. Murder King!
Q. Why was the vampire so unlucky in love? A. He always loved in vein!
Q. Why is there a gate around cemeteries? A. Because people are dying ot get in!

 


Vampire Jokes, Dracula Puns, Blood Thirsty Humor
4 out of 5 vampires agree bloody funny jokes, vampire humor, and Dracula puns really do suck!

Thirsty Vampire Humor = Bloody Funny Jokes
(Because Killer Humor and Immortal Vamp Jokes Are Never TOO Mainstream for the Lovely Ghoul Necks Door!)
Warning: Proceed at Your Own Risk! Vein vampire jokes, coffin spells, and batty puns lie in wait tonight.
| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |
| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |

Q. Where do vampires keep their money? A. In a blood bank!Q. Whare do vampires like to go fishing? A. In the blood stream!Did you hear about a vampire who fell in love with his neighbor? She was teh ghoul necks door!

Q. What does Dracula like for dessert?
A. Leeches and scream.

Q. What is the name of Dracula's new swanky new ship?
A. The Blood Vessel.

Q. Why don't witches go fishing?
A. Because they can only cast spells.

Q. What do you get if you cross a ski instructor and a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. How does a hacker vampire kill its victims?
A. With a kill-o-byte.

Q. Why was the blonde vampire considered simple-minded?
A. Because she was a complete sucker.

Q. What is the blood type of happy people? A. B Positive!Q. What is a vampire's favorite holiday? A. Fangs-Giving!Q. What sort of club would a vampire join? A. A Blood Group!

Q. What do you get if you cross Dracula with Al Capone?
A. A blood thirsty fangster.

Q. What is a vampire's favorite craft?
A. En-graving.

Q. How does Dracula like his food served?
A. In bite-sized pieces.

Q. Why do vampires brush and floss their teeth so often?
A. So they won't have bat breath!

Q. Why doesn't Dracula have very many friends?
A. Because he's such a big pain in the neck.

Q. How can you tell a vampire is sick?
A. He's coffin.

Q. Did you hear about the vampir who was locked up in an asylum? A. He Went Bats!What did a vampire say when he went to the blood bank? A. I vant to make a withdrawal!Q. How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? A. Every night he turns into a bat!

Q. Who is a vampire's favorite superhero?
A. Batman!

Q. How do you get into a vampire drama school?
A. Just act supernatural.

Q. How do vampires recharge at work during mid-afternoon?
A. They take a coffin break.

Q. How much did the psychic know about Count Dracula?
A. A medium amount of information.

Q. Why do vampires just scare you for fun?
A. So they don't get board to death!

Q. What's the difference between a vampire with a toothache and a Colorado thunderstorm?
A. One roars in pain. The other pours in rain.

Q. What did the very polite vampire say? A. Fang you very much!Q. How are vampires like false teeth? A. They both come out at night!Q. Why did the vampire need mouth wash? A. Because he had bat breath!

Q. How does a ghoul say goodbye to a vampire?
A. So long, Sucka!

Q. What does a vampire fear the most?
A. Tooth decay.

Bloody Funny Point to Ponder: Are elderly vampires long in the tooth?

Q. Which soup does a casual vampire chef cook with?
A. Scream of Mushroom.

Q. What is a vampire's least favorite food? A. A Big Long Steak!Q. What do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire? A. Frostbite!Q. What is a vampire's favorite day of the month? A. Friday the 13th!

Q. What do you get if you cross a vampire and aggressive Internet advertising?
A. A blood thirsty hacker.

Q. Why do computer scientists get Halloween and Christmas confused?
A. Because OCT(all)31=DEC(imal)25

Q. What did the vampire say after reading all these bloody funny puns?
A. "These jokes SUCK!"

| Vampire Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Vampire Arts | Bloody Funny | 2 | Friday the 13th Humor |
| Haunted Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Funny Halloween Treats | Halloween Music Jokes |
| Tasty Cannibal Jokes | Deadly Cemetery Jokes | Haunted House Humor | Werewolf Jokes |
| Ghost Jokes | Monster Jokes | 2 | 3 | Mummy Puns | Skeleton Jokes | 2 | Scary Witch Humor |
| Scary Animal Jokes | Bigfoot Sightings | 2 | Undead Puns and Zombie Jokes | Brain Puns | 2 |
| Scary Funny Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | Scary Pick-Up Lines |
| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Daily Jokes | Old Never Die Jokes | Chilling Winter Humor |


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You've flowed down this far, so here's even more bite-sized laughter,
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