Q. What do you call it if a classical composer falls off his horse but gets back on? A. Bach in the saddle again!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Q. Why was the musician arrested? A. He was in treble!
Q. What do you suffer from if you've heard the same song a million times? A. A Melody Malady!
Happy Tunes Day!
Music Pun: I break into song because I can't find the key.
Q. How are harps like elderly people? A. Both are unforgiving and hard to get into and out of your car!


Piano Humor, Sharp Key Jokes, Pianist Puns
Play along with sharp pianist jokes, keyed up laughs, tuned piano puns and keyboard humor.

Piano Jokes, Off-Key Puns, Piano Humor
(Because Piano Bar Jokes Could Never Be Mainstream Enough! But, Should Accordian Bars Should Be Benched?)
Warning: Tune In at Your Own Risk! Note the key to whether piano puns are funny or not isn't black and white.
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Q. What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A. A Flat Miner!Q. Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keyboard? A. He was playing by ear!Q. What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base? A. A Flat Major!

Q. Why was the piano laughing?
A. Because someone was tickling its ivories!

Q. What is messy and sits on a piano bench?
A. Beethoven's First Movement.

Q. How are hot women like pianos?
A. When they're not upright, they're grand!

Key Pun of the Day: To climb to the top of a tall piano, you must scale it!

Q. What's even worse than a sick gopher on your piano?
A. A diseased beaver on your organ!

Q. What do you call somebody involved in a grand opening?
A. A piano tuner.

Q. What do you call a laughing piano?
A. A Yama-ha-ha!

Q. What key is Exploring the Cave with No Flashlight written in?
A. C sharp or B flat!

Q. What is Darth Vader's stage name when he plays his electric piano?
A. The Synth Lord.

Q. How is a concert piano like a car with a manual transmission?
A. Both have three pedals, and most people only know what to do with two of them.

Q. What happened after the pianist got flustered and played the wrong melody?
A. He regained his composer.

Q. Why are pianos so hard to open?
A. Because the keys are inside!

Q. Why do pianos get so many headaches?
A. Because their strings are under so much tension.

Q. How can you tell you've been sitting too long playing the piano?
A. Your Bach hurts.

Q. Who should you consult if you're having a hard time setting priorities?
A. A piano technician because they're skilled at addressing key issues.

Q. What do novice piano composers and computer programmers have in common?
A. Both write in C.

Q. Why did Bach have so many children? A. Because he didn't have a stop on his organ!Q. Why was the piano player arrested? A. Because he got into treble!Q. What's the difference between a piano and a tuna? A. You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna!

Did you hear about the vampire pianist who tortured people with his playing? His Bach was worse than his bite!

Q. Which utensil do pianists need at dinner time?
A. A Tuning Fork.

Q. How does a physicist tune a piano?
A. With string theory.

Q. What did the pianist say when asked to play a particular Beethoven piece?
A. Sonata problem.

Seven piano keys walk into a bar. Bartender say, "Sorry, we can't serve liquor to A minor."

Fine-Tuned Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, they call me the piano man because I really know how to tickle your keys.

Q. How did the piano get out of jail?
A. It used its keys!

Keyed Up Fact of the Day: Old pianists never die; they just adagio away.

Q. Why did the terminally ill pianist hope to die by being hit by a falling piano?
A. That way, he'll go out on a dramatic note.

Q. How were the pianist's fingers like lightning?
A. They rarely strike in the same place twice.

Q. How did the pianist hide the soreness in her right hand during the concert?
A. She played it low key.

Piano Bar Chat Up Line: Hello there, are you a concert pianist? 'Cause you're playing our song.

Q. Which kind of piano songs does the Nike CEO listen to?
A. Just Duets.

Q. Why did the two pianists have such a great marriage?
A. Because they were always in a chord.

Pianist Tip of the Day: Never date a piano tuner. He'll just string you along...

Q. Which insect really likes the piano?
A. Beethoven.

Q. Why was the corn such an a-maize-ing piano player?
A. It could play any tune by ear.

Pick-Up Line of Note: Hey baby, are you a piianist? 'Cause you can tickle my ivoires any time.

Q. What do you call buying a piano for the holidays? A. Christmas Chopin!Did you hear about the pianist who played for just a few people? His performance was low key!Happy Tunes Day!

Q. Where do pianists go on vacation?
A. To the Florida Keys!

The Piano Has Been Drinking, Not Me
– Tom Waits

Q. Why was the piano invented?
A. So the pianist has someplace to put his drink.

Did you hear about the blonde who learned to play piano by ear? She finally figured out it was easier to use her hands...

Musician Hookup Line: Hey girl, wanna go home and see my big organ?

Q. What is one of the hazards of being a musician in a piano bar?
A. People keep dropping money in your drink.

Q. What does a Steinway?
A. Oh, about 800 pounds!

Pianist: Did you hear my last recital?
Friend: I hope so.

Q. What's the name of the new film about a dog who plays the piano?
A. Bitch Perfect.

High Key Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you know, pianists do it with ten fingers.

Q. What message did the pianist leave for his wife?
A. Gone Chopin, have Liszt, Bach in a minuet.

Life is like a piano. White keys are happy moments and black keys are sad moments. But remember, both keys are played together to give sweet music.
– Unknown

Q. What is even worse than lobsters on your piano?
A. Crabs on your organ!

Keyed Up Come-On Line: Hey babe, how'd you like to play my organ?

Q. What happens if you play Beethoven backwards? A. He Decomposes!Q. What's the difference between a terrorist and an accordian player? A. Terrorists have sympathizers!Q. What's the definition of perfect pitch? A. When you toss a banjo into the trash and it hits an accordian!

Q. Why is a concert grand better than a studio upright piano?
A. Because it makes a bigger boom when you toss it off a cliff.

Q. What has 88 keys, but no lock?
A. A Piano.

Q. Which famous snowman plays the piano?
A. Melton John.

Q. Why did the pianist hate the key of E minor?
A. Because it gave him the E B G Bs!

Q. Why are rock band's members all such perverts?
A. Because the drummer sits in back beating it, the guitarist is fingering minors, the basist is slapping it around and they all like the pianist.

Q. What's worse than lobsters on your grand piano?
A. Crabs on your hand organ.

Q. How can you tell if a janitor is a pianist?
A. He carries 88 keus.

Q. What is an accordian good for?
A. Learning how to fold a map.

Q. How did the church musician die?
A. Organ failure.

Q. Why can't skeleton musicians play at church?
A. 'Cause they have no organs.

Q. What goes on when a church musician and a surgeon hang out?
A. They just chill and talk about organs.

Q. What do you get if you drop a piano on a beehive?
A. Bee Flat!

Q. Why did the p;iano tuner quit his job?
A. The salary was flat.

Old pianos players never die, but they do lose their keys.

Q. Which old goat still plays the piano?
A. Billy Joel.

Pick-Up a Musician Line: Hey honey, how about you give me a piano lesson? We could play all night long and make sweet music together.

Q. What do you call an accordian that's possessed by a Native American ghost?
A. Polka Haunt Us.

Key Point of the Day: An accordian is a bagpipe with pleats.

A topless bar tried to have a Polka night, but all the accordianists kept getting hurt.

Q. What happened when the guy left his accordian in his car with all the windows down?
A. When he went back to his car, he was surprised to see a second accordian in the back seat, too.

Q. What is brown and sits on a piano bench?
A. Beethoven's last movement.

Q. Which kind of used piano might you buy for a thousand dollars?
A. A grand piano.

Q. Why did the piano bar musician quit her job?
A. The lounge was just too low key

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