Oh right, that's a show tune? What a relief! It sounded like a gnome porno movie title!

Gnome Musical Fact of the Day: To climb to the top of a tall piano, you must scale it!

Q. Why did the two gnome pianists have such a great marriage?
A. Because they were always in a chord.

Musician Pick-Up Line: Hey Gnirl, this cello isn't the only big wood between my legs.

Q. Why did the clumsy gnome drummer get kicked out of the garden band?
A. He always dropped the beet.

Important Gnome Fact of the Day: Gnome, Gnome on the Range is not a cooking song!

Q. What kind of music do gnomes listen to while they're fishing?
A. A catchy tune!

Pick Up a Musician Line: Gnuy, do you play trumpet? 'Cause you're making me horny.

Q. What is a grumpy garden troll's favorite song?
A. It's Not Much Fun Being a Gnome by Postcards of Life.

Music Wise Gnome Tip of the Day: C-sharp when you cross the street… or you're going to B-flat.

Q. Why shouldn't you date a gnome piano tuner?
A. Because he'll just string you along.

Q. What do gnome musicians in love send their girlfriends on Valentine's Day?
A. Forget-Me-Notes!

Q. What is a happy garden troll's favorite song?
A. The Laughing Gnome by David Bowie.

Q. What is a stoner garden troll's favorite song?
A. The Gnome by Pink Floyd.

Q. What do you call an arrogant gnome trumpet player?
A. A Brass-Hole.

Q. What do you get if you cross a sweet potato and a gnome jazz musician?
A. A Yam Session!

Q. What is a garden gremlin's favorite love song?
A. Gnome Song by Phil and John.

Q. What does a garden gnome do if he can't sing because he has a mouth full of garbanzo beans?
A. He just hummus the tune.

Q. What do you call a bunch of gnome musicians in a hot tub?
A. Vegetable Soup.

Q. What is a young garden troll's favorite song?
A. Teeny Tiny Gnome by The Monkees.

Q. What did Mozart put in his front yard?
A. A metro-gnome.

Today's Musical Gnome Trivia: Metro gnomes make great beat cops, too.

Q. Why wouldn't the gnomes let their younguns go to the symphony?
A. Too much sax and violins.

Gnome Musician Come-On: Gnirl, you can tickle my ivories any time.

Q. What do gnomes say at a garden party?
A. Lettuce turnip the beet!

Q. What did the garden gnome get when he crossed a donkey and a piano?
A. A Yam-Hee-Haw.

Q. What do gnomes call a donkey with a banjo?
A. Bluegr-ass.

Gnome Musician Pick-Up Line: Hey Gnirl, I can help you hit all the high notes.

Did you hear about the gnome farmer who played guitar out in his cornfield? It was music to his ears.

Q. Why did the gnome rock garden star put his guitar in the refrigerator?
A. He wanted to play really cool music.

Q. Why was the gnome guitar player always so stressed?
A. Because he was all strung out!

Gnirl, do you believe in premarital sax?

Q. What is the name of the hot new gnome hip hop duo?
A. Gnome Rhyme Gnor Reason.

Q. Why do gnome drummers have lots of kids?
A. Because they're not too great at the Rhythm Method.

Q. What did the gnome get when he crossed a chicken and a guitar?
A. A bird that sings when you pluck it.

Pick-Up a Gnome Musician Line: Is your name AC/DC? 'Cause I wanna Rock You All Night Long.

Today's Gnome Factoid: Metro gnomes are always on timely trends, but they do have some ticks.

Q. Why is the gnome so glad his lawn went Emo?
A. Now, he never has to cut it.

Musician Gnome Come-On: Hey babe, if you were a berry, I'd want to jam with you all winter long!

Musical Gnome Hookup Line: Gnirl, I bet we could get into some serious treble together.

Q. What do you call a musically gifted gnome?
A. A Christmas rap artist!

Q. Why are Santa's helper gnomes lacking in musical discipline?
A. They're all elf taught!

Q. Which singer is the favorite of gremlins, gnomes, and pixies?
A. Elfish Presley.

Tone-Deaf Come-On: Gnirl, is your name Christmas Carol? 'Cause you are making my heart sing.

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