Q.
How are a Colorado weatherman and a ski area hooker alike?
A. Both can only estimate how many inches they'll get, or
how long it will last.
Q.
How did the blind guy from Denver enjoy a bit of apres skiing
on Lookout Mountain during the last white-out?
A. He brought along his skiing-eye dog.
Q.
What does every great ski area in Colorado already take
into consideration?
A. With great powder, comes great responsibility.
Q.
What does the ski bum do when the chairlift line is too
long?
A. He's gondola top of the mountain.
Q.
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
A. In the local snow bank.
Ski
Area Pick-Up Line: Hey baby,
was it Red Bull that gave you wings, or are you just an
angel?
Q.
Why did the hotdogger quit skiing at MaryJane?
A. Because it was the wurst stunt skier at Winter
Park Resort.
Q.
How can you tell you've had too much coffee while vacationing
in Colorado?
A. You ski uphill!
Q.
Why do stoner tourists spend so much money while on a skiing
holiday at Aspen?
A. Because they're high rollers! |
Q.
What is a cyclops' favorite winter activity?
A. Sking. That's like skiing, but only with one
eye.
Q.
How do snowboarders introduce themselves when they meet
somebody on the slopes?
A. Sorry Dude.
Q.
How are snow boards and vacuum cleaners alike?
A. Both have dirt bags on board.
Q.
What do the guys at the ski repair shop eat their lunch
on?
A. Baseplates.
Ski
Area Pick-Up Line: Hey
baby, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I
go around this chairlift again?
Q.
Which Olympic sport always captures the attention of Colorado
locksmiths?
A. Skiing!
Q.
Why don't skeletons ski the black diamond runs at Copper
Mountain?
A. They've got soul, but they just don't have the heart
for it.
Up-Lifting
Laugh of the Day: The local bank in Aspen introduced a new
cash machine built in to a tree at the base of Snowmass.
If it's successful, they intend to expand with other branches
at Aspen Mountain, Buttermilk, and Aspen Highlands.
Q.
Which kind of corn chips are best after a day of skiing
when you're sitting in front of the fireplace with your
boots off?
A. Tostitos.
Colorado
Tourism Point to Ponder: When your week off goes downhill
and you decfde to extend it another week, is that a stay-cation
a ski-cation?
|
Skiing
Point to Ponder: Why do we get so excited about ski vacations
considering once they've arrived, it's all downhill from
there?
Q.
What do skiers order at fast food restaurants?
A. Icebergers with Chilly Sauce, on the slide.
Q.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to
the slopes?
A. Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
Q.
What do young Colorado skiers enjoy most at school?
A. Snow and Tell!
Q.
Which classic candy is still the favorite of Colorado backcountry
skiers?
A. Sno-Caps.
Q.
How do ski instructors get to work?
A. By icicle.
Q.
What do apres-ski participants in white-out blizzard
conditions eat for lunch?
A. Icebergers. BRR!
Q.
How can you tell you've had too much coffee and weed while
vacationing in Vail, Colorado?
A. You have the ability to ski uphill!
Q.
At the craft beer pub in Breckenridge, Colorado what is
the drunk guy's favorite kind of skis?
A. Brewskies!
Q.
Why did the old alpine skier die so suddenly?
A. He went downhill fast. |