Q. Why couldn't the sesame seed leave the casino? A. Because it was on a roll!   PainfulPuns.com - Silly Questions + Dumb Answers = Punny Riddles

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Q. Why couldn't Batman go fishing? A. Robin ate all the worms!
Q. What is a vampire's favorite type of person to bite? A. A Redneck!
Big Ape Asks: Why did the idiot go broke? A. He had no cents!
Q. What do Yeti call thwir offspring? A. Chill-dren!
Q. What did the frog order at McDonalds? A. French flies and a diet croak!


Riddles + Answers = Solved Mystery Jokes
Find funny answers to life's little mysteries, perplexing humor, and ridiculous riddles.

Silly Riddles, Dumb Questions, Paradox Jokes
(Because Silly Stumper Jokes and Head-Scratching Riddles Could Never Be TOO Mainstream – Or Could They?)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Who is Caution and do I know her? Only you can answer that riddle!
| Funny Riddles Answered! | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Brilliant Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are Blonde Jokes Dumb? | Why Do Pirates ARR? |

Q. What Do You Get If You Cross a Donkey with an Owl? A. A Smart Ass That Knows It All!Q. What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? A. I don't know, and I don't care!Animal Pun: Q. How can a leopard change his spots? A. By Moving

Q. What happens when an owl gets a sore throat?
A. He doesn't give a hoot!

Q. What do you get if you cross an owl and a pussy cat?
A. Meowls.

Q. What is the most common owl in London?
A. The TeatOwl, because everybody has a tea towel.

Q. Which kind of owl has a low voice?
A. A growl. Q. What do you call a teenage owl with attitude? A. A scowl.

Q. Why were scientists disappointed with the reaction when they announced finding a cure for apathy?
A. No one showed the slightest interest in their discovery.

Q. How can you create artificial peace?
A. With indifference.

Q. What's the dif between apathy and indifference?
A. Who cares?

Unanswered Riddle: Why are there no opinions about apathy?

Q. Which font do wildcats like best?
A. Leopard Print.

Q. Why can't leopards ever successfully escape from the zoo?
A. Because they're always spotted.

Q. Which day do leopards like best?
A. Chewsday.

Q. What did the leopard say after lunch?
A. That really hit the spot!

Q. What do you get when you cross a chick with an alley cat?
A. A Peeping Tom.

Q. What do you call somebody who finds jobs for cabbage? A. A head hunter!Q. How Do Chickens Dance? A. Chick to ChickQ. What's sour, green, and swims in an aquarium? A. A trop-pickle fish!

Q. Why did the cabbage win the race?
A. Because it was a head!

Q. How did the farmer mend his torn green jeans?
A. With a cabbage patch.

Q. Which type of vegetable gets PMS?
A. The Cab-bitch!

Q. What do you call cabbage with a great bod?
A. Head and shoulders above the rest.

Q. What do you call a chicken crossing the road?
A. Poultry in motion.

Q. What do chickens serve at birthday parties?
A. Coop cakes!

Q. How do chickens bake cakes?
A. From scratch.

Q. What do you call somebody who steals chicken?
A. Chicken Pot Pirate.

Q. What is green and terrorizes sailors?
A. Moby Pickle.

Q. What do you get if you cross an alligator with a pickle?
A. A croco-dill!

Q. When should you shoot pool with a pickle?
A. Only when you find the cue cumbersome.

Q. Where does a pickle go to mellow out after work on Friday night?
A. The salad bar.

Q. What do you call a cow eating grass? A. Lawn Moo-erQ. What do you call passageways between rows of seats in England? A. The British Aisles!Q. How did the piglet with laryngitis feel? A. He was a little disgruntled!

Q. What happens if a cow works too hard?
A. She cow-lapses!

Q. What is it called when one cow spies on another cow?
A. A steak out.

Q. What do you call a really strong cow?
A. Beefy.

Q. Why are cows so good at math?
A. They love to cow-nt.

Q. What do Brits eat for breakfast?
A. Cheerios, ol' chap!

Q. Which British restaurant only serves pancakes?
A. All Day Brexit.

Q. What time was it in the horror flick when the monster eats the British Prime Minister?
A. Eight P.M.

Q. Why doesn't England have a kidney bank?
A. Because it has Liverpool.

Q. How do you get a sick pig to the hospital?
A. In a Hambulance!

Q. What's the difference between curing bird flu and swine flu?
A. With bird flu you need tweetment and with swine flu, you need oinkment.

Q. What did the big boar say when a wolf grabbed his tail?
A. "That's the end of me! Stop bacon me mad!"

Q. Why do aliens visit the Mile-High City? A. Denver is just a little closer to home!Q. When do you go at red and stop at green? A. When you're eating a watermelonQ. Which word is always spelled wrong in the dictionary? A. Wrong!

Q. Why is Denver known as the Mile High City?
A. 5280 pot shops.

Q. Why is Denver such a happy city?
A. Because of all the hop-timistic beer drinkers.

Q. What to you call flying solo in the Mile High Club?
A. Hijacking!

Q. Why didn't the stallion show up to his Denver Broncos-themed wedding?
A. He got colt feet.

Q. Why does Denver have such a wide demographic range of ages that consume legal marijuana?
A. I25 and I70.

Q. Why did one melon break up with the other?
A. He didn't know water problem was.

Q. Why can't a watermelon get a driver's license?
A. They go at red and stop at green!

Q. Which sweet gourd commits serious garden crimes?
A. A water-felon.

Q. Why aren't watermelon puns funny?
A. Because they make you lose your rind.

Q. Why do watermelons make great entrepreneurs?
A. Because they always have seed money.

Q. What is an artery?
A. The study of paintings.

Q. What is bacteria?
A. The back door to the cafeteria.

Q. What is a CAT scan?
A. When you're searching for your lost kitty.

Q. What is an enema?
A. Not your friend. ...

Q. What is a tablet?
A. A small table.

Q. What is morbid?
A. A higher offer.

Q. What is labor pain?
A. When you get hurt at work.

| Funny Riddles, Dumb Answers | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Brilliant Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are Blonde Jokes Dumb? | Why Do Pirates ARR? |
| Am I Crazy? | Am I Funny? | Are You Kidding? | What Rhymes with Orange? | Are You Drunk? |
| Have You Seen Bigfoot? | Are You An Alien? | Why Do Vampires Bite? | Are You a Winer? |
| Why Are Hipsters Hip? | What Time Is It? | Where Am I? | Am I High? | Am I a Superhero? |
| Do I Need a Doctor? | Am I Dead? | Why Did the Cow Jump Over the Moon? | Is It Friday Yet? |

PainfulPuns Home
You've lasted this far, so here's even more unexplained laughter,
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that explain it all:

More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

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| Questionable Music Puns | Pet Riddles | Pick-Up Lines | Painful Puns | Pirate Jokes | Scary Funny Riddles |
| Sci-Fi Wonders | Seasonal Riddles | Sports Jokes | Tech Support Riddles | Travel Jokes | Weather Riddles |

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