Punny Riddle: Q. What happens to illegally parked frogs? A. They get toad away.   PainfulPuns.com - Silly Questions + Dumb Answers = Punny Riddles

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Q. Why do toilets run? A. They never learned how to job!
Q. Which insect never plays quarterback? A. The Fumble Bee!
Q. What did the drummer get on his IQ test? A. Saliva!
Q. How many ears does Captain Picard have? A. Three. A right ear, a left ear, and a final front ear!


Mystifying Riddles, Beguiling Questions, A. nswers
Get no doubt answers to funny riddles, head-scratching humor, and stinking funny nosy jokes.

Funny Riddles, Questionable Jokes, Teaser Puns
(Because Gassy Riddles and Bubbly Questions Could Never Be TOO Mainstream in the Joke Think Tank!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Stinking funny riddles, wisecrack humor, and questionable puns ahead.
| Funny Riddles Answered! | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Brilliant Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are Blonde Jokes Dumb? | Why Do Pirates ARR? |

Q. How do you murder a salad? A. Go for the carrot-id artery!Q. What Did the Judge Say When a Skunk Walked In to Testify? A. Odor in the Court! Q. What happens when Anakin Skywalker grills you a burger? A. It's a little on the dark side!

Q. Which martial art are carrots best suited for?
A. Carr-o-tee!

Q. Which veggie watches over all the elderly vegetables?
A. The carrot-aker.

Q. What do you call a carrot with right angles?
A. A square root.

Q. What was the incontinent farmer's biggest problem?
A. He managed the carrots, but could not control his peas!

Q. How much money does a skunk have?
A. Just one scent.

Q. How many skunks do you need to make a real stink?
A. A Phew!

Q. Which college do skunks attend?
A. P.U.

Q. What does a religious skunk say?
A. Let us spray.

Q. What do you get if you cross a sci-fi robot and a skunk?
A. R2-PU.

Q. What did Luke say when he found out Darth Vader was his father?
A. Oh Sith!

Q. Why did Anakin cross the road?
A. To get to the Dark Side!

Q. How does Darth Vader like his toast?
A. On the Dark Side.

Q. What is the name of Darth Vader's sister?
A. Ella Vader.

Q. Where does Princess Leia go shopping for Father's Day?
A. The Darth Maul.

Q. Where did the Psychiastrist eat lunch? A. Kentucky Freud ChickenQ. Why can't your nose be 12 inches long? A. Because then it would be a foot!Q. What do you get if you cross a bat with a lonely hearts club? A. A lot of blind dates.

Q. What is the difference between a psychologist and a magician?
A. A psychologist pulls habits out of a rat!

Q. What did the psychiatrist say to his blonde nurse?
A. "Please just say 'We're really busy," instead of 'It's a madhouse in here.'"

Q. What did the shrink say to the man with an elephant on his head?
A. "You have a lot on your mind."

Q. Why is learning about podiatry fairly easy?
A. Because all the manuals use footnotes.

Q. Who does a foot doctor call when he needs help?
A. A big toe truck.

Q. Why did the mother snake buy two boots for her little snake?
A. Because the doctor said he'd grown two feet.

Q. Why did the vampire poet fail?
A. He went from bat to verse.

Q. What happened when two bats met?
A. It was love at first bite.

Q. Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A. Because he had bat breath.

Q. Why does Bruce Wayne like all these painful puns?
A. Because they're so batty!

Crow Chef Asks. What happens if you eat yeast and shoe polish? A. Every morning, you rise and shine!Q. Why do cows wear cowbells? A. Because their horns don't work!Q. Which insect really bugs your locksmith? A. A Mosquito!

Q. What did yeast say to flour?
A. I loaf you dough much!

Q. Why is dough another word for money?
A. Because it's always kneaded.

Q. Why was the baker in a panic?
A. Because he was in a loaf or death situation.

Q. What do you see when the Pillsbury Doughboy bends over?
A. Doughnuts!

Q. Where do cows ride in the train?
A. The cow-boose.

Q. What happens when you talk to a cow?
A. It goes in one ear and out the udder.

Q. Where can you find a gallery of cows?
A. At an art moo-seum.

Q. Where do cows go for a night out?
A. To the moo-vies.

Q. Why don't vampires like mosquitoes?
A. Too much competition!

Q. What is a mosquito's favorite sport?
A. Skin Diving.

Q. Who should you call when mosquitoes attack?
A. The SWAT Team!

Q. Are mosquitoes religious?
A. Yes, they prey on you!

Q. Why did the blonde throw butter out the window? A. She wanted to see butterfly.Q. What do you call four bullfighters standing in quicksand? A. Quatro Sinko!Q. What do you give a person with water on the brain? A. A Tap on the Head.

Q. What do you call a butter family reunion?
A. Meeting a butter from an udder mother.

Q. What did one slice of bread say to the other when he noticed there was butter and jelly on the table?
A. I guess we're toast.

Q. What is a dairy farmer's favorite gourd?
A. Butternut squash.

Q. What did Pat say to his girlfriend?
A. You're my butter half.

Q. How many bullfighters does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just Juan!

Q. What do you call a bullfighter whose car was stolen?
A. Carlos.

Q. Why can't bullfighters be firemen?
A. They can't tell the difference between Jose and hose B.

Q. Why hasn't anybody heard the latest Russian doll riddle?
A. 'Cause it's an inside joke.

Q. What is a sleeping brain's favorite band?

Q. Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
A. It did not want to be brainwashed!

Q. Which cranial nerve would be right at home in Nevada?
A. The Vagus Nerve!

Q. Where does a neuron keep its money?
A. In a brain bank.

| Funny Riddles, Dumb Answers | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 |
| Brilliant Light Bulb Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Light Bulb Zodiac Riddles |
| Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road? | Are Blonde Jokes Dumb? | Why Do Pirates ARR? |
| Am I Crazy? | Am I Funny? | Are You Kidding? | What Rhymes with Orange? | Are You Drunk? |
| Have You Seen Bigfoot? | Are You An Alien? | Why Do Vampires Bite? | Are You a Winer? |
| Why Are Hipsters Hip? | What Time Is It? | Where Am I? | Am I High? | Am I a Superhero? |
| Do I Need a Doctor? | Am I Dead? | Why Did the Cow Jump Over the Moon? | Is It Friday Yet? |
| What's That Smell? | Which Toy Is Most Fun? | Is It Hot In Here? | Where Can I Find a Date? |

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You've lasted this far, so here's even more bewildering humor,
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More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

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| Farm Riddles | Fit Questions | Horn Riddles | Questionable Music Puns | Pirate Jokes | Scary Funny Riddles |
| Sci-Fi Wonders | Seasonal Riddles | Shoe Riddles | Shrink Questions | Sports Jokes | Weather Riddles |

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