Q. Why is it tough to be a top photographer these days?
A. You have to deal with a lot of crop!

Q. Why can't you find a broad array of photographer jokes?
A. Because they just don't pan out.

Q. How are a camera and a sock different?
A. A camera takes photos, but a sock takes five toes.

Q. What did the photographer say to the breeze?
A. I'd like to shoot you some time.

Q. Why was it so rough to be a photographer before the digitall age?
A. 'Cause they always developed a negative image.

Q. Why did the blonde smack her camera with a frying pan?
A. She wanted a pan-o-ram-ic shot.

Q. Why is it so hard to be the photographer at a vegan wedding?
A. Nobody smiles when you ask them to say, "Cheese."

Q. What do you get if you cross a magician and a camera?
A. Hocus Focus!

Old photographers never die! They just go to the old focus home.

Q. What is usually the problem with cameras that don't take good pictures?
A. The loose nut on the other side of the lens.

Q. What did scientists confirm after announcing the first photo of a black hole?
A. Once you go black, you never do come back.

Q. What do you call somebody who becomes rich and famous posting his images on social media?
A. A slefie made man.

Fine Art Point to Ponder: If you photograph your pimples, is zit art?

Q. What is a wildlife fish photographer called?
A. A school shooter.

Q. Why do fashion models always smile during thunderstorms?
A. Because they think they're having their pictures taken.

Gnome wonder there are not many dark rooms these days? Ew!

Q. Why did the blonde have to give up her career as a photographer?
A. She just couldn't stay focused.

Q. Why did the redneck restaruant supply theif become a photographer?
A. 'Cause he was so good at taking pitchers.

Q. Why did the photographer get in an argument with the gallery owner?
A. He wasn't in the right frame of mind.

Q. Why did the blonde aspire to become a selfie photographer?
A. 'Cause she pictured herself doing that. DUH!

Q. Why did the cops arrest the photographer?
A. For flashing people.

Criminal Pick-Up Line at the Police Station: Hey there, you're just as beautiful as your mugshot photo.

Q. What happened after a guy reported his coffee cup stolen?
A. He had to go down to the police station to look at some mug shots.

Q. What do you call it when a prisoner drinks vodka out of a coffee cup?
A. A mug shot!

Criminal Come-On Line: You're just as beautiful as your mugshot photo.

Q. Where does a digital photographer hang his picutres?
A. On a JPEG.

A blonde just keeps going on and on about Painful Puns photographer puns. You just can't shutter up!

Q. Why was the trouserless photographyer arrested?
A. For indecent exposure.

Q. What happened to the unfortunate old photographer who ran out of subjects?
A. He just shot himself.

Q. Why couldn't the party photographer see straight?
A. 'Cause he had taken too many shots.

Photographers are really mean! First they frame you, then they shoot you, and then they hang you on the wall.

Q. Why was Popeye such a great photographer?
A. 'Cause he was DSLR Man.

Did you hear about the photographer who died? The graphic story of his demise absolutely made me shutter.

Q. Why did the doctor prescribe Ritalin for the blonde photographer?
A. 'Cause she just could not focus.

Fine Art Point to Ponder: When the critic said the photo was terrible, did the photographer get the picture?

Q. How can you tell your turtle is a prolific photographer?
A. He's a Snapping Turtle.

Q. What kind of pics does a turtle photographer snap?
A. Shell-fies.

Q. What's it called when you take a selfie with a rattlesnake?
A. A big missss-take!

Q. Why did the photographer become a podiatrist?
A. 'Cause she enjoyed editing raw footage.

Out of Focus Point to Ponder: Is the quickest way to make money from photography to just sell your camera?

Did you hear about the unfortunate weather chaser who recently died? His last photos of lightning were really quite striking, though.

Q. What do the picketers do when reporters want to photograph them?
A. They strike a pose.

Q. What do lawyers say when they pose for photographs?
A. Fees.

Q. What is a terrorist photographer's weapon of choice?
A. A photobomb.

Q. What did the old photographer say when he retired?
A. I can't take it any more.

Q. How are a photographer and a sniper alike?
A. Both are paid to take head shots.

Grandpa was given a selfie stick for Christmas. Turns out he can now hold the phone far enough away to read his text messages.

Q. Which kind of pet does a professional photographer prefer?
A. A snapping turtle.

Q. What did the old TV news photographer say about his hectic career after he retired?
A. It was all just a blur.

Q. Why did photographers see shrinks more often before digital cameras?
A. They tended to be depressed because they spent so much time developing negatives.

Q. Why did the photographer go to the shirnk?
A. He was having problems with his perspectives.

Anti Pick-Up Line: Are you a picture frame? 'Cause all you do is sit on the couch and remind of times I'd rather forget.

Q. Why was the photographer fired from his job with the National Parks Service?
A. He just didn't pan out.

Q. Who is the most famous movie photographer in China?
A. Phil Ming.

Q. Why did photographers attend psychic medium seances more often before digital cameras?
A. 'Cause they were used to spending time in dark rooms.

Museum Visitor: Am I allowed to take pictures here?
Blonde Tour Guide: No, they have to stay on the wall.

Q. What happened to the 1960s Yukon wildlife photographer who sat too long while capturing his shots?
A. He ended up with polar roids.

Q. What did the underwear model have to do to prepare for the photo shoot?
A. He had to be well-briefed.

Q. Why do photographers make such great girlfriends?
A. 'Cause they don't mind if you shoot raw.

Q. Why did the Penthouse photographer shoot a porno film?
A. 'Cause he was used to picturing everybody naked.

Q. What did the wife say after her husband told her he wanted to frame a picture of her breasts?
A. Okay, if I can take a pic of your penis and enlarge it.

Q. Why did the doctor change the photographer's prescription from Ritalin to Adderall?
A. 'Cause she lost her focus.

Old time photographers never died. They just stopped developing.

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