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Pet
Puns, Tame Humor, Companion Animal Jokes
Laugh
along with funny pet puns, fuzzy animal humor, catty grins and hilarious
pet jokes.
Funny Pet Jokes, House Pet Humor, Fauna Puns
(Because Pet Lovers with a
Great Sense of Humor and Lots of Pet Treats Could Never
Be TOO Mainstream! Woof!) |
Warning:
Please Don't Overfeed the Pets! Fuzzy animal jokes, fishy humor,
and furry funny pet puns ahead.
| Pet Animal Jokes | 1
| 2 | 3 | 4
| 5 | Bird Jokes
| Dog Jokes | 2
| Pet Cat Jokes | Feline
Jokes |
| Finny Fish Puns | Fishy
Humor | Frog Jokes and Toad Puns
| Snake Jokes and Reptile Puns |
| Vet Jokes |
Mouse Jokes, Rat Puns | Rabbit
Jokes, Bunny Puns, Hare Humor |
Pet Rodent Jokes |
Q.
Why did the dietician's pet parrot wear a rain coat?
A. She wanted to be polly unsaturated.
Q.
How do robins stay so fit?
A. They do lots of morning worm-ups.
Q.
Which kind of shampoo do most pet birds prefer?
A. Dove.
Q.
What do you call the leader of the flock of marauding crows?
A. Branch manager. |
Q.
Why don't fish typically do too well in school?
A. Because they work below C level.
Q.
Why did the fish blush?
A. Because it saw the ocean's bottom!
Fishy
Groan of the Day: If you know more funny fish puns, let
minnow!
Pick-Up
a Fish Line: Hey Finny, do you believe in love at first
sight, or should I swim by again?
|
Q.
What is it called when a pet kitty cat wins at the dog show?
A. A cat-has-trophy!
Q.
Why did the leopard wear a striped shirt?
A. So he wouldn't be spotted.
Q.
What do you get if you cross an owl with a cat?
A. Meowls.
Q.
What did the poker player do when his cat got hungry?
A. He fed the kitty. |
Q.
Where do sheep go on vacation?
A. The Baa-hamas.
Q.
Where are newborn lambs kept?
A. In an inc-ewe-bator.
Sheepish
Hookup Line: Hey, ewe
wanna go on a picnic? Alpaca lunch!
Q.
If dogs have fleas, what do sheep have?
A. Fleece! |
Q.
What did the pet rabbit say to the carrot his owner fed
him?
A. It's been nice gnawing you!
Q.
How do rabbits travel?
A. By hare plane.
Hare-y
Pick-Up Line: Hey Buck,
are you the Energizer Bunny? 'Cause you just keep going
and going through my mind.
|
Q.
Where do birds invest their money?
A. The stork market.
Q.
Which type of bird is even noisier than a whooping crane?
A. A trumpeter swan.
Fair
Feather Pick-Up Line: Hey fine-feathered fella, I heard
you like hooters? 'Cause you're gonna love what
Owl give you. |
Q.
Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A. She was a double crosser!
Q.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoons?
A. They go out on a peck-nic.
Q.
Why are original chicken jokes always so clucking
funny?
A. Because they're made up from scratch! |
Q. What did boyfriend mouse say to girlfriend mouse's family?
A. Mice to meet you.
Q.
Why did the pet mouse stay indoors?
A. Because it was raining cats and dogs outside.
Pet
Hamster Pick-Up Line:
Hey baby, let's make the exercise wheel squeak all night!
|
Fishy
Groan of the Day: Did you hear about the pet goldfish that
went bankrupt? Now, he's a bronze fish.
Q.
What do you call a naked fish?
A. A barracuda.
Fishy
Hookup Line: Hey girl,
there lots of fish in the sea, but it's only you I sea
with me. |
Q.
Why are most horses in good shape?
A. Because they're on a stable diet.
Q.
Why did the horse talk with hay in its mouth?
A. It lacked good stable manners.
Q.
What did the jockey say when asked to train the young race
horse?
A. I'll get ride on it! |
Q. Why couldn't the butterfly go to the dance?
A. Because it was a moth ball.
Did
you hear about the two bed bugs who met in a mattress? They
got married in the spring.
Q.
What do butterflies study in school?
A. Moth-ematics.
|
Q.
Why shouldn't you share your bed with your pet pig?
A. Because they hog the covers!
Q.
What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?
A. Bacon and Legs!
Q.
What do swine use to chat
up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines! |
|
Pet Animal Jokes | 1
| 2 | 3 | 4
| 5 | Veterinarian
Jokes | Dog Jokes | Colorado
Dog Jokes |
| Pet Cat Puns and Cat Lady Jokes
| Feline Humor | Wildcat
Jokes, Cheetah Puns, Lion LOLs |
| Bird Jokes | Duck
Jokes, Quack Puns, Loon Laughs | Goose
Jokes and Water Fowl Humor |
| Owl Jokes, Owl-ful Puns
| Cocky Rooster Jokes | Chicken
Jokes, Hen Humor | Dinosaur
Jokes |
| Pet Rodent Jokes | Mouse
Jokes, Rat Puns | Rabbit Jokes,
Funny Bunny Puns, Hare Humor |
| Farm Animals | Cow
Puns | Pig Puns |
Sheep Puns | Donkey Jokes |
Horse Jokes | Broncos |
| Finny Fish Puns | Fishy
Humor | Marine Mammal LOLs, Sealife
Jokes | Frog Jokes, Toad Puns
|
| Wild Animal Jokes | Wolf
Howls | Bear Puns | Deer
Humor | Bat Jokes | Animal
Poop Puns |
| African Safari Animal Jokes
| Monkey Jokes | Gorilla
Jokes, Big Ape Puns | Elephant
Jokes |
| Kangaroo Humor |
Reptile Puns | Snake Jokes
| Scary Animal Jokes | Animal
Pick-Up Lines |
| Bug Puns, Insect Jokes | Bee
Jokes | Spider Jokes | Animal
Music Jokes | Party Animal Grins
|
| Colorado Animal Jokes | Bigfoot
Jokes | 2 | 3
| Animal Sports Humor | Xmas
Animal Jokes |

You've
hopped along this far, so here's
more catty laughter,
horsey humor,
petty funny jokes and fishy
painful puns that deserve a pet on
the back:
|
More
Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...
|
Blonde Jokes | Butter
Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Dancer
Jokes | Dating Jokes | Grammar
Jokes | Hair Jokes |
| Hipster Humor | Internet
Jokes | Killer Jokes | Magic
Jokes | Man Jokes | Music
Jokes | Pee Puns | Pirate
Puns |
| Sci-Fi Jokes | Seasonal
Humor | Sports Jokes | Travel
Jokes | Turd Jokes |
Woman Jokes | Wookiee Jokes |
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