Q. Why did the dietician's pet parrot wear a rain coat?
A. She wanted to be polly unsaturated.

Q. How do robins stay so fit?
A. They do lots of morning worm-ups.

Q. Which kind of shampoo do most pet birds prefer?
A. Dove.

Q. What do you call the leader of the flock of marauding crows?
A. Branch manager.

Q. Why don't fish typically do too well in school?
A. Because they work below C level.

Q. Why did the fish blush?
A. Because it saw the ocean's bottom!

Fishy Groan of the Day: If you know more funny fish puns, let minnow!

Pick-Up a Fish Line: Hey Finny, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swim by again?

Q. What is it called when a pet kitty cat wins at the dog show?
A. A cat-has-trophy!

Q. Why did the leopard wear a striped shirt?
A. So he wouldn't be spotted.

Q. What do you get if you cross an owl with a cat?
A. Meowls.

Q. What did the poker player do when his cat got hungry?
A. He fed the kitty.

Q. Where do sheep go on vacation?
A. The Baa-hamas.

Q. Where are newborn lambs kept?
A. In an inc-ewe-bator.

Sheepish Hookup Line: Hey, ewe wanna go on a picnic? Alpaca lunch!

Q. If dogs have fleas, what do sheep have?
A. Fleece!

Q. What did the pet rabbit say to the carrot his owner fed him?
A. It's been nice gnawing you!

Q. How do rabbits travel?
A. By hare plane.

Hare-y Pick-Up Line: Hey Buck, are you the Energizer Bunny? 'Cause you just keep going and going through my mind.

Q. Where do birds invest their money?
A. The stork market.

Q. Which type of bird is even noisier than a whooping crane?
A. A trumpeter swan.

Fair Feather Pick-Up Line: Hey fine-feathered fella, I heard you like hooters? 'Cause you're gonna love what Owl give you.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A. She was a double crosser!

Q. What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoons?
A. They go out on a peck-nic.

Q. Why are original chicken jokes always so clucking funny?
A. Because they're made up from scratch!

Q. What did boyfriend mouse say to girlfriend mouse's family?
A. Mice to meet you.

Q. Why did the pet mouse stay indoors?
A. Because it was raining cats and dogs outside.

Pet Hamster Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, let's make the exercise wheel squeak all night!

Fishy Groan of the Day: Did you hear about the pet goldfish that went bankrupt? Now, he's a bronze fish.

Q. What do you call a naked fish?
A. A barracuda.

Fishy Hookup Line: Hey girl, there lots of fish in the sea, but it's only you I sea with me.

Q. Why are most horses in good shape?
A. Because they're on a stable diet.

Q. Why did the horse talk with hay in its mouth?
A. It lacked good stable manners.

Q. What did the jockey say when asked to train the young race horse?
A. I'll get ride on it!

Q. Why couldn't the butterfly go to the dance?
A. Because it was a moth ball.

Did you hear about the two bed bugs who met in a mattress? They got married in the spring.

Q. What do butterflies study in school?
A. Moth-ematics.

Q. Why shouldn't you share your bed with your pet pig?
A. Because they hog the covers!

Q. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?
A. Bacon and Legs!

Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!

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