Q. What's the best way to communicate with a fish? A. Drop him a line!   PainfulPuns.com - Pet Puns + Funny Birds, Cats, Dogs = Pet Peeves

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Q. Why didn't the dog want to play football? A. He was a Boxer!
Q. What's the difference between a piano and a tuna? A. You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna!

 


Pet Puns, Tame Humor, Companion Animal Jokes
Laugh along with funny pet puns, fuzzy animal humor, catty grins and hilarious pet jokes.

Funny Pet Jokes, House Pet Humor, Fauna Puns
(Because Pet Lovers with a Great Sense of Humor and Lots of Pet Treats Could Never Be TOO Mainstream! Woof!)
Warning: Please Don't Overfeed the Pets! Fuzzy animal jokes, fishy humor, and furry funny pet puns ahead.
| Pet Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bird Jokes | Cat Jokes and Wildcat Puns | Dog Jokes | 2 |
| Finny Fish Puns | Fishy Humor | Frog Jokes and Snake Puns | Mouse and Rodent Jokes |
| Farm Animal Jokes | Chicken Jokes | Duck and Goose Jokes | Cow Puns | Pig Puns | Sheep Puns |
| Donkey Puns | Horse Jokes | Bronco Puns | Insect Puns | Scary Animals | Animal Pick-Up Lines |

A pet store had a bird contest, with no perches necessary.Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says, "Dam!"Q. What is the difference between a cat and a comma? A cat has claws at the ends of its paws, but a comma has a pause at the end of its clause.

Q. Why did the dietician's pet parrot wear a rain coat?
A. She wanted to be polly unsaturated.

Q. How do robins stay so fit?
A. They do lots of morning worm-ups.

Q. Which kind of shampoo do most pet birds prefer?
A. Dove.

Q. What do you call the leader of the flock of marauding crows?
A. Branch manager.

Q. Why don't fish typically do too well in school?
A. Because they work below C level.

Q. Why did the fish blush?
A. Because it saw the ocean's bottom!

Fishy Groan of the Day: If you know more funny fish puns, let minnow!

Pick-Up a Fish Line: Hey Finny, do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swim by again?

Q. What is it called when a pet kitty cat wins at the dog show?
A. A cat-has-trophy!

Q. Why did the leopard wear a striped shirt?
A. Do he wouldn't be spotted.

Q. What do you get if you cross an owl with a cat?
A. Meowls.

Q. What did the poker player do when his cat got hungry?
A. He fed the kitty.

Mischievous Lambs Post Wooly Funny Videos on Ewe TubeQ. What do you call a rabbit with fleas? A. Bugs BunnyQ. What is the difference between a miser and a canary? A. One's a little cheap & the other's a little cheeper.

Q. Where do sheep go on vacation?
A. The Baa-hamas.

Q. Where are newborn lambs kept?
A. In an inc-ewe-bator.

Sheepish Hookup Line: Hey, ewe wanna go on a picnic? Alpaca lunch!

Q. If dogs have fleas, what do sheep have?
A. Fleece!

Q. What did the pet rabbit say to the carrot his owner fed him?
A. It's been nice gnawing you!

Q. How do rabbits travel?
A. By hare plane.

Hare-y Pick-Up Line: Hey Buck, are you the Energizer Bunny? 'Cause you just keep going and going through my mind.

Q. Where do birds invest their money?
A. The stork market.

Q. Which type of bird is even noisier than a whooping crane?
A. A trumpeter swan.

Fair Feather Pick-Up Line: Hey fine-feathered fella, I heard you like hooters? 'Cause you're gonna love what Owl give you.

Q. How Do Chickens Dance? A. Chick to ChickQ. What is a mouse's favorite game? A. Hide and SqueakQ. What do you name a fish with no eyes? A. FSH

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A. She was a double crosser!

Q. What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoons?
A. They go out on a peck-nic.

Q. Why are original chicken jokes always so clucking funny?
A. Because they're made up from scratch!

Q. What did boyfriend mouse say to girlfriend mouse's family?
A. Mice to meet you.

Q. Why did the pet mouse stay indoors?
A. Because it was raining cats and dogs outside.

Pet Hamster Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, let's make the exercise wheel squeak all night!

Fishy Groan of the Day: Did you hear about the pet goldfish that went bankrupt? Now, he's a bronze fish.

Q. What do you call a naked fish?
A. A barracuda.

Fishy Hookup Line: Hey girl, there lots of fish in the sea, but it's only you I sea with me.

Q. What do you dall a veterinarian with laryngitis? A. Hoarse DoctorQ. Why did the blonde throw butter out the window? A. She wanted to see butterfly.Q. Why did the pig quit sun bathing? A. He was bacon in the heat!

Q. Why are most horses in good shape?
A. Because they're on a stable diet.

Q. Why did the horse talk with hay in its mouth?
A. It lacked good stable manners.

Q. What did the jockey say when asked to train the young race horse?
A. I'll get ride on it!

Q. Why couldn't the butterfly go to the dance?
A. Because it was a moth ball.

Did you hear about the two bed bugs who met in a mattress? They got married in the spring.

Q. What do butterflies study in school?
A. Moth-ematics.

Q. Why shouldn't you share your bed with your pet pig?
A. Because they hog the covers!

Q. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?
A. Bacon and Legs!

Q. What do swine use to chat up a date?
A. Pig-Up Lines!

| Pet Animal Jokes | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bird Jokes | Cat Jokes and Wildcat Puns | Dog Jokes | 2 |
| Finny Fish Puns | Fishy Humor | Frog Jokes and Snake Puns | Mouse and Rodent Jokes |
| Farm Animal Jokes | Chicken Jokes | Duck and Goose Jokes | Cow Puns | Pig Puns | Sheep Puns |
| Donkey Puns | Horse Jokes | Bronco Puns | Insect Puns | Scary Animals | Animal Pick-Up Lines |
| Wild Animals | Bear Jokes | Deer Puns | Monkey Jokes | Animal Poop Puns | Bigfoot Jokes | 2 |
| Colorado Animals | Animal Music Jokes | Party Animals | Sports Animals | Xmas Animal Jokes |


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You've hopped along this far, so here's more catty laughter, horsey humor,
petty funny jokes and fishy painful puns that deserve a pet on the back:

More Painful Puns, Groaner Jokes, and Unanswered Riddles...

| Batman Puns | Blonde Jokes | Cheesy Puns | Chef Jokes | Colorado Jokes | Daily Laughs | Hairy Jokes |
| Gnome Kidding! | Hipster Humor | Magician Jokes | Music Jokes | Pick-Up Lines | Pirate Puns | Scary Jokes |
| Sci-Fi Funnies | Seasonal Puns | Sports Jokes | Travel Jokes | Turdy Puns | Weather Jokes | Zombie Puns |

Painful Puns, Punny Funs, Ouch! Edible Puns, Fun with Food Funny Riddles, Punny Answers!
Animal Puns, Wildlife Humor Clucking Funny Farm Animal Puns Holiday Puns, Silly Seasonal Jokes

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