| Q.
What do you call a donkey with a banjo at the Telluride,
Colorado music festival?
A. Bluegr-ass.
Q.
What do folks in Pueblo, Colorado call a donkey with a Ph.D?
A. A smart ass!
Q.
What happened when the blonde guy hired a mini donkey on
E Colfax?
A. He got a little ass.
Q.
What do high country horses in Colorado see before
they hear thunder?
A. A lightning colt.
Q.
Which medication does a lisping snake take before giving
a presentation to the Colorado Parks Department?
A. Anti-hiss-tamines.
Q.
What do raccoons in Niwot, Colorado do after they've raided
the henhouse?
A. They enjoyed their poached eggs.
Q.
What is it called when a resident of Evergreen, Colorado
dreams black bears are currently in their kitchen raiding
the refrigerator?
A. A bite-mare.
Q.
Where do Colorado bruins inter their deceased brethren?
A. In the local bear-ial grounds.
Q.
How does Sasquatch find his way through the remote Colorado
woods?
A. He sticks to the big footpath.
Q.
Why don't river otters in Rocky Mountain National Park hold
grudges?
A. That's just water under the bridge.
Colorado
Wildlife Joke of the Day: If you had a dollar for every
deer joke on this page, you'd have one buck. |
Two
stoners were out for a leisurely walk in Colorado and saw
a fly on a pile of horse crap. One pothead said the other,
"Wow, he really had to go bad!"
Q.
What does it mean when you find a horseshoe on a Colorado
trail?
A. Some poor horse is walking around in his socks.
Q.
What sickness can a Denverite get from riding a wild horse?
A. Bronco-hitis!
Q.
Why was The Incredible Hulk fired from his gig as weatherman
on Denver's 9News?
A. Because his forecast was always the same: Partly
cloudy with a 50% chance of pain, and because Kathy
Sabine's horse kicked him out of her way...
Q.
What do Denverites call a poem composed by clever Colorado
canines that you have to scan to understand?
A. A bark ode.
Q.
What do you call it when a mean detective mutt follows you
around at Denver International Airport?
A. Being cur-tailed.
Q.
Which popular breed of dog in Colorado has the most coins?
A. Bloodhounds, because they're always picking up cents
around the Denver Mint.
Q.
Why was the squirrel in Denver's Wash Park so stressed out?
A. Because he spent so much time out on a limb.
Colorado
Winter Point to Ponder: During a blizzard, how would you
even know if you saw Bigfoot, or if that actually was the
Abominable Snowman?
Q.
Why did the Colorado poultry farmer always tell jokes to
the hens?
A. He liked to egg them on.
|
Q.
What happens when ducks fly upside down over a Colorado
cannabis grow?
A. They quack up!
You
might be from Colorado if you refer to tourists as pilgrims
or turkeys.
Q.
What do ducks and geese like about the great outdoors in
Colorado?
A. Debris!
Q.
What happened after the Turkey Vultures at Deckers, Colorado
figured out the branch wouldn’t hold their nest?
A. Nothing. They weren't going to dwell on it.
Rich
Denver Point to Ponder: Are pigeons wealthy? 'Cause they
have no problem making deposits on expensive cars parked
in Cherry Creek.
Q.
Why was a Sloan's Lake duck arguing with the plastic surgeon?
A. Because he wanted to have his bill reduced.
Q.
What do a plastic surgeon and a blonde urban chicken farmer
in Arvada, Colorado have in common?
A. Both can supply really big breasts.
Q.
What do Denver weathermen call it when ducks and geese suddenly
fall out of the sky?
A. Fowl Weather.
Q.
Why didn't the goose in Denver think he'd be a suspect in
the Wash Park crime?
A. 'Cause he thinks his shit don't stink.
A
man returned to the vet clinic in Trinidad, Colorado to
see if his pet's surgery was successful. Vet says, "Here's
the bill. Unfortunately, we couldn't reattach it to
your duck."
Q.
Why did that Vail area beaver go to jail?
A. He held up the dammed riverbank.
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