What do the cops say when they arrive during your tailgating
A. Dish is the Police!
Why did you dump these vegetables on my desk?
Criminal: Because you said it was time to spill the beans.
What do lawyers call crimes that the police department solve
A. Brief cases.
Why wouldn't the police officer come out from under the
A. He was arresting.
What do you call a thief that steals everything except your
soap and towels?
A. A dirty crook!
How do prison inmates contact friends and family on the
A. They use cell phones.
cops in a squad car crash into a tree. One turns to the
other and says, "Wow, this is the fastest we've ever
gotten to the accident site."
Which four letters really scare a covert thief?
A. O, I, C, U.
When I pulled you over, I guessed 55.
Matronly Suspect: No sir, it's just my hat that makes me
look like that.