Q. Why are police officers excellent volleyball players? A. They know how to serve and protect!   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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When the T-ball players started crying, the ball field became a bawl park!
Gym Joke: My struggle with steroids has only made me stronger!
Q. Which positioin did Bruce Wayne play in Lttle League? A. bat boy!
Q. Why was the pig ejected from the football game? A. For Playing Dirty!
Q. What did the dentist say to the golfer? A. You have a hole in one!

 


Sporting Humor, Ballpark Jokes, Athletic Laughs
Play around with sporting team humor, funny sports puns, athlete LOLs and jocular jock jokes.

Sports Puns, Ball Game Puns, Running Jokes
(Because Brawny Sports Puns and Running Jokes Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream for Joggers, Cheetahs, or Plumbers!)
Warning: Participate at Your Own Risk! Stiffly competitive sports jokes, athlete puns, and laughing jocks ahead.
| Sports Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Sports Pick-Up Lines |
| Baseball Jokes | 2 | Basketball Puns | Bodybuilder Jokes | Bowling Jokes | Hit Boxing LOLs |
| Camping Puns and Hiking Jokes | Fishing Puns | Fitness Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Golf Jokes |
| Gym Jokes and Workout Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | Gnome Gym Jokes | Running Jokes and Jogger Puns |
| Soccer Jokes and Futbol Humor | Sports Animal Jokes | Swimming Jokes | Tennis Jokes |
| NFL Football Jokes | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Colorado Sports Humor | Snow Skiing Jokes |

Q. How many tennis players does it take to change a light bulb? A. What do you meanit was out? It was in!Q. Why do toilets run? A. They never learned how to job!Q. Why shouldn't you break up with a goalie on Valentine's Day? A. Because he's a keeper!

Q. Why do tennis players have low self esteem?
A. Because they have so many faults.

Q. Where do ghosts play tennis?
A. On a tennis corpse.

Q. Why do tennis players like vending machines?
A. 'Cause they don't have to wait to be served.

Q. Why were the pro tennis player's neighbors so upset?
A. Because she always made such a big racquet.

Q. Why was the criminal dubbed the Beer Runner let go after being arrested for stealing 23 beers?
A. 'Cause the prosecutors didn't have a case.

Q. What do they call the marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining champion.

Did you hear about the blonde marathon runner who ran for an hour, but only ran two feet? Well, Duh! She only had two feet!

The trouble with jogging is that ice falls out of your glass.
– Martin Mull

Q. How is a bad soccer team like a worn-out old bra?
A. No cups and little support.

Q. What do soccer players send out during the holidays?
A. Yellow cards.

Soccer Player Pick-Up Line: Hey there, are your legs tired? 'Cause you've been running through my mind all night.

Q. When is a world class soccer stadium the absolute hottest?
A. After all the fans have gone.

Q. What do they call a soccer game ref in Transylvania? A. A Vumpire!Gym Joke: Gnome body builders are not ab-gnormal!Big Ape Asks: What do a bad football team & a pothead have in common? A. Both get blitzed!

Q. What is a ghost soccer player's best position?
A. Ghoulie.

Q. What did the mummy coach say to the ghoul's soccer team?
A. Okay, let's wrap up this game!

Q. If eleven zombies are running after you on a soccer field, what time is it?
A. Eleven after one.

Q. What do you get if you cross a World Cup soccer player with the Invisible Man?
A. Goals like you've never seen before.

Gym Troll Tip of the Day: Before every workout, always warm up with at least 10 reps of selfies to both Facebook and Twitter.

Fitness Philosophy Failure: I've accepted the fact that being cremated is the only way I'll ever have a smokin' hot body.

Q. What do you call a bodybulider with a sunburn?
A. Flex Peeler.

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, do you have a bandaid? 'Cause I'm cut!

Q. Do the Walking Dead play NFL football?
A. Yes! They play offense 'cause that's what to do in Denver when your're dead.

Q. Why couldn't the defensive football player pass his test in school?
A. He was a tackling dummy.

Q. How are football games like boobs?
A. Big or small, they're both great – except when they're lopsided!

Q. Why couldn't the old school all-star football player listen to music?
A. He broke all the records.

Q. How did the lost Alaskan fishing boat captain get back on course? A. He Got His Bering Strait!Baseball Says: Happy batter Day!Gold Medal Asks: Which days of the week are the strongest? A. Saturday & Sunday. The rest are week days!

Q. What did the redneck fisherman say to his buddy?
A. I got a new fly reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made!

Q. Why are fishing boots the warmest to wear when wading in a cold stream?
A. Because they have electric eels.

Q. What does every sole fisherman want?
A. A gill-friend!

Q. Which villan lurks at the bottom of the sea?
A. Jack the Kipper.

Q. What did the baseball glove say to the ball?
A. Catch ya later!

Q. Why was the baseball player so good at writing advertising jingles?
A. 'Cause they're so catchy.

Q. Why are some umpires fat?
A. Because they always focused on cleaning the plate.

Q. Which Star Wars movie is a baseball player's least favorite?
A. The Umpire Strikes Back.

Workout Wisecrack: Remember, your brain needs exercise, too. So, spend lots of time thinking up excuses not to work out.

Fun Fitness Fact: Did you know eating oysters can increase your mussel mass?

Workout Point to Ponder: If you work out religiously, does that mean twice a year, around the holidays?

Workout Wisecrack: They say the best exercise is in the bedroom. Well, that's where I get the strongest resistance...

Q. What happened when the battery and tennis ball got into a fight? A. The battery was charged and teh tennis ball is waiting to go to court!Why do gnomes like baseball? Gnome Runs!Q. How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? A. Every night he turns into a bat!

Tennis Tip of the Day: If you walk into a bar dressed as a tennis ball, you'll be served right away.

Q. Which state has the most tennis players?
A. Tennis-Sea!

Q. How can you tell your tennis opponent isn't happy with your serve?
A. He keeps returning it!

Q. How does a tennis publicity master impress the crowd?
A. He hits overheads, 'cause then every point will be a smash hit.

Q. What do you call it when a tennis player hasn't lost a single match to an opponent?
A. All set to win.

And yes, gnomes on the move are always trying to get to first base with the ladies.

Q. Which cartoon character is the best at baseball?
A. Homer Simpson.

Q. How can a ballplayer pitch a winning game without throwing a ball?
A. By only throwing strikes!

Ballpark Laugh of the Day: A baseball walks into a bar. The bartender throws him out.

Q. What did the mitt say to the baseball?
A. Catch ya later!

Q. Why does a pitcher raise one leg when he pitches?
A. If he raised both, he'd fall down!

Q. Why did the vampire strike out?
A. He used the wrong bat!

Q. Why did the baseball team recruit a tiny ghost?
A. 'Cause they needed a little team spirit.

Baseball Fan: Have you ever seen a line drive?
Blonde Baseball Fan: No, but I have seen a baseball park!

Q. Why did the baseball team hire a piano tuner?
A. Because he had perfect pitch.

Q. What happened when the home team was up 10-0?
A. The fans at the baseball stadium were having a field day.

| Sports Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Sports Pick-Up Lines |
| Baseball Jokes | 2 | Basketball Puns | Bodybuilder Jokes | Bowling Jokes | Hit Boxing LOLs |
| Camping Puns and Hiking Jokes | Fishing Puns | Fitness Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Golf Jokes |
| Gym Jokes and Workout Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | Gnome Gym Jokes | Running Jokes and Jogger Puns |
| Soccer Jokes and Futbol Humor | Sports Animal Jokes | Swimming Jokes | Tennis Jokes |
| NFL Football Jokes | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Colorado Sports Humor | Snow Skiing Jokes |

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You're still in the ball game, so here are even more runs of laughter,
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| Seasonal Humor | Sharp Cheese Puns | Superhero Jokes | Time Travel Puns | Travel Jokes | Zombie Jokes |

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Monstrously Funny Puns Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes! Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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