Q. What do you get if you cross a game console and a retired fighter?
A. An X-Boxer.

Q. What happened when the boxer tripped while taking a road sobriety test?
A. The officer gave him a 10-count.

Q. How are a bottle of beer and a boxer alike?
A. They're both empty from the neck up.

Q. Does a match box?
A. No, but a tin can.

Q. Which player listens to the band, Cake, during a baseball game?
A. The batter!

Q. Why did the blonde softball team always eat at Taco Bell before a game?
A. So they'd get more runs than the opponents.

Q. Why are some umpires fat?
A. Because they always clean the plate.

Q. What do you call a winged insect that hits home runs?
A. A fly swatter!

Workout Wisecrack: Remember, your brain needs exercise, too. So, spend lots of time thinking up excuses not to work out.

Q. What it is it called if you refuse to go running today?
A. Resistance Training!

Gym Tip of the Day: Before every workout, always warm up with at least 10 reps of selfies to both Facebook and Twitter.

Q. How is the gym like church?
A. No matter what you do all week, you think you can erase it all with one visit.

Q. What is a ghost's favorite spot on a football field?
A. Under the ghoul posts.

Q. Which insect just doesn't play well at quarterback?
A. The fumble bee!

Q. What do you call an NFL football team that cries after losing the big game in over-time?
A. A bawl club.

Q. Why was the blonde hiding from exercise?
A. Because she was in the Fitness Protection Program.

Gym Pick-Up Line: Are you a high jumper? 'Cause babe, you make my bar go up!

Bodybuilder Trainer Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, go ahead and grab my EZ Bar.

Q. What is an inverted pigeon in yoga class?
A. It's what's under the downward dog.

Q. Why did the blonde baseball player put springs on his cleats?
A. Because he was getting ready for spring training!

Q. Why shouldn't you even think about dating the blonde outfielder who got hit in the head by a baseball?
A. 'Cause she's a bad catch.

Q. Which baseball player holds water?
A. The pitcher.

Q. How can you tell if an ambidextrous baseball player is bisexual as well?
A. He swings both ways.

Q. Why don't matches play baseball?
A. Because one strike, and they're out!

Q. What's the difference between a high-hit baseball and a maggot's father?
A. One is a pop fly and the other is a fly pop.

Q. What is scratch golf?
A. When you hit the ball and scratch your head wondering where it went.

Q. What did the golfer's wife complain about on the course?
A. She claimed golf was driving a wedge between them.

Q. How do pro golfers stay so cool?
A. They stand next to their fans.

Q. Why did the newbie weightlifter get fed up and quit the gym?
A. Because his name is Max and he really hated all the jokes.

Gym Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, wanna sit on my lap while I use the rowing machine?

Q. What is the best protein a zombie bodybuilder can eat?
A. Another bodybuilder.

Gym Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, we should train together. I've heard that's good for bone density.

Q. Why don't male cattle like baseball?
A. Because of the bullpens.

Gym Pick-Up Line: Do you know karate? 'Cause your body is really kicking!

Q. Which type of underwear do race horses wear?
A. Short Jockeys.

Q. Where should a baseball player never wear red?
A. In the bullpen.

Q. What do baseball catchers wear on Halloween?
A. Face masks.

Q. What do sports fans call an uproar over a controversial win?
A. Victory flap.

Q. What makes frogs great baseball players?
A. They're so good at catching flies!

Bodybuilder Pick-Up Line: Hey babe, you've hit your plateau, but damn it would be hard to top you.

Q. What is necessary for achieving one's goals?
A. A hockey puck.

Did you hear about the blonde marathon runner who ran for an hour, but only ran two feet? Well, Duh! She only had two feet!

Q. Where do zombies go swimming?
A. The Dead Sea.

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