How do we know Santa is a man?
A. He shows up late, eats your cookies, empties his sack,
calls you a ho, and leaves while you're sleeping.
Pick-Up Line: Do you have
a boyfriend? 'Cause I Kwanza be yo bae.
What do you get if you cross Father Christmas and a detective?
A. Santa Clues.
Lovers Holiday Wish: May all your Christmases be white,
What do you call it when Santa ends up at the South Pole?
A. A Lost Claus.
What does Santa take if he's not feeling well on Christmas
A. A chill pill.
What do you call a jolly old dog who works at the North
A. Santa Paws.
What kind of wine does Rudolph the Reindeer prefer?
A. Red! Unless he's on a rooftop, then White!
Why was Santa cast in a musical?
A. Because he had stage presents.
Pick-Up Line: Does watching
Miracle on 34th Street make you Santa-mental, too?
What is Santa's favorite snack food?
A. Crisp Pringles.
How does Mrs. Claus endure living at the North Pole?
A. She's enjoys living in a Wine-ter Wonderland!