Q. What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa? A. A Rebel Without a Claus!   PainfulPuns.com - Holiday Puns, Silly Seasonal Jokes, Happy Days

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Q. Why doesn't Sant let the elvs cook? A. the steaks are too high!
Q. Why is Santa so jolly? A. He knows where all the naughty girls live!
Q. What goes, "Oh Oh Oh?" A. Santa walking backward!

 


Reindeer Puns, Xmas Humor, Santa Claus Jokes
Wake up to find funny Santa jokes, festive reindeer games, and elF-ing funny Xmas puns.

Christmas Jokes, Santa Puns, Holiday Humor
(Because Jolly Xmas Jokes That Absolutely Sleigh You Are Never TOO Mainstream for Reindeer Comedians!)
Warning: UnWrap at Your Own Risk! Jolly Christmas jokes, holiday laughs, and rude reindeer puns ahead.
| Nice Christmas Jokes and Merry Naughty Xmas Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| Santa Claus Jokes | 2 | Elf 'n Funny Puns | Christmas Animal Jokes | Holiday Reindeer Puns |
| Christmas Music Jokes | Xmas Come-Ons | 2 | Weather Humor | 2 | Colorado Weather Puns |
| Snow Jokes | Snowman Jokes | Winter Humor | 2 | 3 | Winter Hookup Lines | Skiing Jokes |

Why don't we ever hear anythng about the 1oth reindeer, Olive? ...Olive the other reindeer, used ot laugh and call him names!Q. What do you call people who are afraid of Santa? A. Claustrophobic!Big Ape Asks: What do Hip Hop artists do on Christmas? A. Un Wrap!

Q. What did the blonde guy say when he looked out the window on Christmas Eve?
A. It looks like rein, dear.

Holiday Pick-Up Line: Are you a menorah? 'Cause you light up my realm.

Q. What do they call a blind reindeer at the North Pole?
A. No Eye Deer?

Q. What do you get if Santa goes down a chimney into a lit fireplace?
A. Krisp Kringle.

Xmas Pick-Up Line: Hey Girl, we need to get together before Christmas 'cause you can't spell LOVE with No L.

Q. What do you call it when St. Nick suddenly stops singing Xmas Carols?
A. Santa Pause.

Q. Who is the king of Santa's rocking helpers?
A. Elfis, thank you very much.

Q. What do Baroque musicians do if they don't like their Xmas gifts?
A. Hand them Bach.

Q. Who is the disco elf's favorite reindeer?
A.
Dancer.

The 4 Stages of Life. !. you believe in Santa Claus. 2. You don't believe in Santa 3. You dress of as Santa 4. You actually look like SantaQ. Which classic Christmas carol is the favorite of parents? A. Silent Night!Q. Why are Christmas trees so fond of the past? A. Because the presents beneath them!

Q. What kind of footwear does Santa Claus wear when he rides the train?
A. Platform shoes.

Q. Why do some reindeer moonlight driving snow plows?
A.
Because there's no business like snow business!

North Pole Pick-Up Line: Girl, I am quite the elf-a-male.

Chilling Christmas Holiday Point to Ponder: Is Aunt Arctica Santa Claus's sister?

Q. What do you call a Christmas Carol parody that just isn't funny?
A. The First No-LOL!

Reiny-Day Christmas Pick-Up Line: Hey there Blitzen, how 'bout we make this not such a Silent Night?

Q. What do you call cutting down a tree for the holidays?
A. Christmas Chopping.

Q. Which travel game do kids play on a winter road trip over the meadow and through the woods?
A. Ice Spy.

Christmas Anti Pick-Up Line: Hey, I can get you off the Naughty List.

Q. Why don't reindeer like picnics? A. Because of all their ant-lures!What's the worst skin disease you can get at Christmas time? A. Excemas!Q. What do you call a smelly Santa Claus? A. Farter Christmas!

Q. What is the difference between Rudolph the Reindeer and a Knight?
A. One slays the dragon, but the other drags the sleigh.

Q. Which exercise do elves at Santa's candy factory do to stay fit?
A. Peppermint twists.

Christmas Pick-Up Line: Babe, just call me Rudolph, 'cause you just sleighed me.

Q. Why is it always so bitterly cold at Christmas time?
A. Because it's at the end of Decembrrr.

Q. How does a sheep wish you a Merry Christmas?
A. Sheep send wool-tide bleatings.

Q. What did the Spanish teacher ask the girl about her new Christmas sweater?
A. Fleece Navidad?

Santa and his wife wanted to split up, but there are no divorce lawyers at the North Pole. So, they got a semicolon instead; they're great for separating independent Clauses.

Christmas Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, wanna come over to my place and light the yule log?

Q. Why does Santa grow tomatoes during the his off season?
A. He likes to hoe, hoe, hoe.

Q. What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? A. Tinsel-itis!Q. What do you call an obnoxious reindeer? A. Rude-Olph!Chimp Elf Asks: What do you call a wet animal? A. A Reindeer!

Q. What happens if you use the fireplace on Christmas Eve?
A. You get Crisp Kringles.

Christmas Pick-Up Line: Baby, do you need a tree topper? 'Cause I've been told I'm a star on top.

Q. What do you call a scary rogue reindeer?
A. A cari-boo.

Christmas Pick-Up Line: Hey Girl, it's the holidays, so I prefer to give rather than receive.

Q. Do reindeers go to school?
A. No, they're elf-taught.

Q. In North Pole snowman speak, what is an Ig?
A. A crappy house without a Loo.

| Nice Christmas Jokes and Merry Naughty Xmas Humor | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 |
| Santa Claus Jokes | 2 | Elf 'n Funny Puns | Christmas Animal Jokes | Holiday Reindeer Puns |
| Christmas Music Jokes | Xmas Come-Ons | 2 | Weather Jokes | 2 | Colorado Weather Puns |
| Snow Jokes | Snowman Jokes | Winter Humor | 2 | 3 | Winter Hookup Lines | Skiing Jokes |
| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Happy Birthday Party Humor | Gnome Holiday Party Jokes |
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