If you get a gift basket from a psychiatrist, it'll probably be shrink wrapped.   PainfulPuns.com - Holiday Puns, Silly Seasonal Jokes, Happy Days

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Funny Party Jokes, Birthday Humor, Partying Puns
Party along with ageless birthday jokes, gifted puns, and funny birthday party humor.

Birthday Jokes, Party Puns, Holiday Humor
(Because Hilarious Party Jokes Could Never Be TOO Mainstream at Your Good Old Happy Birthday Celebration!)
Warning: Party Hearty at Your Own Risk: Painful Party Puns are Present. And, Happy Birthday to You!
| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Happy Birthday Party Humor | Gnome Holiday Party Jokes |
| Valentine's Day Jokes | St. Patrick's Day Jokes | Spring Holidays Jokes | Hot Summer Jokes |
| Halloween Jokes | Thanksgiving Jokes | Christmas Jokes | New Year's Eve Jokes | Winter Puns |
| Day of the Week Jokes | Sunday Funday Puns | Monday Jokes | Tuesday | Wednesday Jokes |
| Thursday Humor | Friday Jokes and Fried Day Funs | Saturday Party Puns | Daily Pick-Up Lines |

Q. What's the worst thing about being a birthday cake? A. After you're set on fire, you are eaten by the hero who saved you!Q. What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday? A. Aye Matey!Chimp Asks: Why did the blonde put candles on the toilet seat? A. She was decorating for a surprise birthday potty!

Q. Why did the hot guy always feel warm on his birthday?
A. Because folks just wouldn't stop toasting him!

Good News: Your birthday party is really hot! But the Bad News is: Your cake is on fire and the clown is dead!

Q. What did one candle say to the other?
A. Don't birthdays just burn you up?

Blonde Patient: Doctor, I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.
Doctor: Next time, try taking the candles off first.

Q. What do you call the psychic ability to know what's inside a wrapped birthday present?
A. It's a gift.

If your birthday gets you down, just remember you're older today than yesterday, but younger than tomorrow.

Q. What does a pirate on shore leave wish for on his birthday?
A. A little booty!

Q. Where do some pirates party?
A. At the sand bar.

A pirate walks into a bar on his birthday. Bartender says, "Hey, did you know there's a steering wheel in your pants?" Pirates replies, "Yarrr, and it's driving me crazy!"

Q. Why was it so hard to call the pirate on his birthday?
A. Because he left his phone off the hook.

Q. Why don't time travelers have birthday celebration parties?
A. Because they're not interested in the presence.

Q. What did the ice cream say to the sad birthday cake?
A. What's eating you?

Q. What did her dad say after the blonde handed him his 50th birthday card?
A. Thanks so much, but one would have been enough.

Q. Why did the blonde bring soap to the birthday party?
A. She heard it was a soap-prize party!

Q. Are birthdays good for your health?
A. Yes, studies show people who have more birthdays do live longer.

Q. Which party animal has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow?
A. A Birthday Pheasant.

Q. What did the Happy Birthday balloon say to the pin?
A. Hi, Buster.

Q. Where did the birthday boy smack his pinata?
A. Right in the sweet spot.

To recieve your gifts in person, you need to be present!Q. Which song do you sing at a snowman's birthday party? A. Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!A martini says: Did you hear about the wall that went out on the town for its birthday? It got plastered!

Q. What did the bald guy say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A. "Thanks, I'll never part with it."

Q. When is a birthday cake just like a golf ball?
A. When you slice it.

Q. What does a basketball player do before blowing out the candles on his birthday?
A. He makes a swish!

Q. What is a gentleman?
A. A guy who remebers your birthday, but not your age.

Q. How can you tell your wife likes the new fridge you gave her for her birthday?
A. Her face lit up when she opened it!

Q. What can you do if nobody is showing any sympathy for a miserable fellow?
A. Say, Let's get this pity started!

Q. What is the best age to be?
A. Old enough to know better, and young enough to do it anyway!

Did you hear about the maple tree's birthday bash? It was a really sappy party.

Typical Birthday Bummer: Forget about the past, you can't change it. Forget about the future, you can't predict it. Forget about the present, I didn't get you one.

Q. What is the best way to remember your wife's birth date?
A. Forget it once...

Q. How do you describe the hiker who always climbed to the mountain's summit on her birthday?
A. Getting up there in years.

B-Day Point to Ponder: Are birthdays Nature's way of telling us to eat more cake?

Q. How do pickles celebrate their birthdays?
A. They relish the moment.

Q. Why is age a relative term?
A. Because all your relatives keep reminding you just how old you are.

Q. Just wondering, but were any famous men born on your birthday?
A. No. Just babies.

Q. How do you know you're getting old?
A. The candles on your birthday cake cost more than the cake!

Q. Why did the birthday cake go to the doctor?
A. It was feeling really crumby.

Q. Why did the Lincoln penny debut on the centennial of his birth?
A. Because that made cents!

Always be careful when driving to evening parties? Better safe than soiree!Q. When does a carrot wear a mask? A. When it's going to a mask carrot ball!How do you organize a galactic party? You Planet!

Q. Why do we put candles on top of a birthday cake?
A. Because it's too hard to light them on the bottom.

Q. What happens if a blizzard stops folks from getting to your birthday party?
A. You can have your cake and eat it, too.

Vegan Party Pick-Up Line: Hey, I don't always turnip at parties, but when I do I'm the radish guy there.

Party Point to Ponder: What does an invisible mask look like, and how would you know if you found one?

Q. How do you know you're a redneck?
A. You're invited to a come as you are party, and you show up naked.

Q. How was the dancer's party?
A. It was a tappy occasion.

Q. How long will the Easter Bunny celebrate?
A. He'll party around the cluck.

Q. Why do walruses like Tupperware parties?
A. They're always on the lookout for a tight seal.

Q. Why do you call somebody who always wears a mask?
A. Two-faced.

Did you hear about party for our flag?
It was a very flappy occasion.

Q. What is a cow's favorite party game?
A. Moo-sical Chairs.

Q. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
A. Because he had no body to go with.

Q. What does a chef say when it's time to celebrate?
A. It's Party Thyme!

Q. What did the indigenous person say to the postmodern anthropologist at the party?
A. Can we talk about me for a change?

Q. Why did all the photos at Batman's party come out dark? A. He forgot to invite the Flash!Q. Why didn't the face of Boe go to the party? A. Because he had no body to go with!Sparkling Wine Says: Happy Funday!

Q. What happens if you go to a sea turtle's party?
A. You have a shell of a time!

Q. What does a clam do at a party?
A. He shell-abrates.

Q. How do you know you're at a bulimic bachelor party?
A. The cake jumps out of the girl!

Q. Why do gynecologists only drink Pabst Blue Ribbon beer and Smirnoff Vodka at parties?
A. They're accustomed to Pabst Smir.

Q. Why did the snooty egotistical woman's party go so badly?
A. It suffered from a host of problems.

Q. What did the Mallard wear to the party?
A. A Dux-edo.

Q. What is an occasion for burping?
A. A Tupperware party!

Q. Why did the elephant bring toilet paper to the celebration?
A. Because he was a BIG party pooper.

The most disgusting party act of all time: A magician swallows two pieces of string, and then two hours later they come out tied together. I shit you knot!

Q. What is the difference between the G-spot and a bottle of Jack Daniels?
A. This is exactly why blondes hate party night!

Q. Why was the party animal called "The Exorcist?"
A. As soon as he arrives at the party, he rids it of all its spirits.

Q. What is the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?
A. Get married on his birthday.

Q. Who did the mortician invite to his party?
A. Everybody he could dig up.

Q. What did the moonshiners do when they had their pictures taken?
A. They stood still.

Q. What is the most challenging party trick for a magician?
A. Figuring his way out of the invitation...

| Holiday Party Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Happy Birthday Party Humor | Gnome Holiday Party Jokes |
| Valentine's Day Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Valentine VD Pick-Up Lines | St. Patrick's Day Jokes |
| Spring Holidays Jokes | Happy 420 Jokes | Party Animal Puns | Hot Summer Holiday Jokes |
| Halloween Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Halloween Treats | Spooky Come-Ons | Thanksgiving Jokes |
| Christmas Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | Xmas Chat Ups | 2 | Xmas Music Jokes |
| Christmas Animal Jokes | New Year's Eve Jokes | Winter Humor | 2 | 3 | Winter Hookup Lines |
| Daily Jokes | Sunday Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | Monday | 2 | 3 | Tuesday | 2 | 3 | Wednesday | 2 | 3 |
| Thursday Humor | 2 | Friday Funs | 2 | 3 | 4 | Saturday LOLs | 2 | 3 | Daily Pick-Up Lines |

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You've opened this gift of laughter, so here's even more celebratory cheer,
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| Poetic Puns | Sci-Fi Jokes | Sports Jokes | Timely Humor | Vacation Jokes | Weather Jokes | Wine Jokes |

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Monstrously Funny Puns Crappy Puns & Sh*tty Jokes! Pot Puns, Weed Jokes, Green Grow-ners!

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