Q.
Which spring holiday do sea captains dread most?
A. May Day! May Day! SOS!
Q.
What is Yoda's favorite day of year?
A. May the 4th!
Q.
When is Earth Day for Yoda?
A. May the 4th.
Q.
Why did the blonde toss her jar of mayonaise into the river
on May 5?
A. 'Cause it was Cinco de Mayo. DUH!
Q.
Which rootn' tootin' May holiday is celebrated
by eating way too many refried beans?
A. Stink-o de Mayo.
Q.
What happened after the guy put his foot through the trampoline
in his yard?
A. He's had a spring in his step ever since.
Q.
What did the spring robin say to the early worm?
A. I'll catch cha later...
Q.
Which non-contagious affliction did the trampoline suffer
fromr?
A. Spring fever.
Q.
What is it called when you start to write a poem, but start
to itch and sneeze?
A. A spring elegy attack.
Q.
Why did the mattress go see a doctor?
A. Because it had spring fever. |
Q.
Which kind of flowers are most appropriate on Mother's Day?
A. Mums!
Q.
Which May holiday is devoted to overly doting moms?
A. Smothers Day.
Q.
Which spring holiday features both ragtime and wrap
music?
A. Mummies Day.
Q.
Why do mummies enjoy Mothers Day so much?
A. They get to relax and unwind!
Q.
Do mummies celebrate Mothers Day?
A. Yes, of corpse!
Q.
If moms have Mother's Day and dads have Father's Day, what
is a single guy's holiday?
A. Palm Sunday.
Q.
What does a snake take to relieve its spring allergy symptoms?
A. Anti-hiss-tamines.
Q.
Which Roman emperor suffered from spring seasonal allergies?
A. Julius Sneezer.
Q.
Which kind of insect takes a lot of pictures of spring crocus,
daffodil, and tulip blossoms?
A. A Shutterbug.
|
Q.
Why do fashion models always smile during late spring thunder
storms?
A. Because they think they're having their pictures taken.
You
might be from Colorado if you normally expect snow on Easter,
Mother's Day, Halloween, and Thanksgiving but not on Christmas.
Q.
What do you call a Colorado spring skier who tells tall
tales on April 1?
A. A snow fake.
Q.
What do jewelers call March, April, and May birthstones?
A. Spring bling.
Q.
Why do the birds and the bees enjoy March 21 so much?
A. Cause that's the time to spring into action!
Q.
Why do clocks like March better than October?
A. 'Cause they get to spring forward.
Q.
Who is a blue Colorado tree seedling's favorite singer?
A. Spruce Springsteen.
Q.
What do you call early sweet cherries picked in late May?
A. Spring Bings.
Q.
How do you describe the crowd of people attending the Memorial
Day parade?
A. Respectable. |