Chimp asks: Why are Denver Broncos jokes getting dumber and dumber? A. How can it be a joke, if nobody is laughing?   PainfulPuns.com - Puns, Jokes, Word Play, Groaners, Ouch!

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Wolf asks: What is Colorado's state slogan? A. Welcom to the high country!
Q. Which Denver suburb do pirates prefer? A. Arrrvada!
Cheesehead Hulk asks: What stinks worse, muenster or horse crap? Go Broncos!
Q. What did the beekeeper say whn his bees made cannabis honey? A. Do-Bee Do-Bee Do!

 


Colorado Humor, Peak Outdoor Puns, Inside Jokes
Preview your Colorado vacation with high country jokes, blunt humor, and salsa puns.

Coloradan Jokes and Colorado Native Humor
(Because Free-Range Jokes, Blunt Banter, and Whinny Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream in Colorado!)
Warning: Weather This Visit with Caution! High altitude humor, Colorado native jokes, and colorful puns ahead.
| Colorado Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Denver Puns | 2 | 3 |
| You Might Be From Colorado If... | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Colorado Tourism | Mountain Jokes | 2 | 3 |
| Colorado Music Jokes | Colorado Commuter Jokes | Colorado Fashion Puns | Colorado Bigfoot |

| Colorado Nightlife Jokes | Mile High Club Jokes | Denver Dog Jokes | Rocky Wildlife Puns | 2 | 3 |
| Colorado Sports Puns | Skiing Jokes | Hiking Jokes | Fishing Puns | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Colorado Weather | Colorado Craft Beer Puns | Colorado Cannabis Jokes | Colorado Come-Ons |

You might be from Colorado if hail freaks you out so bad that you have a hard time getting a cab!You might be from Colorado if you friend asks your plans for today's hike and you summit up nicely!Ape chef says: You might be from Colorado if you fire up the grill after shoveling a foot of snow off the deck!

Q. What did the Colorado hail storm say to the roof?
A. Hang onto your shingles 'cause this ain't no ordinary sprinkles.

In Colorado, if you don't get hit by lightning or hail, you might as well just go along with the flow.

Q. What do Denver weathermen call it when chickens and ducks suddenly fall out of the sky?
A. Fowl Weather.

Q. What is a Colorado skier's mantra?
A. There's snow place like home!

Q. Why are Colorado hiking supply stores so diverse?
A. Because they employ people from all walks of life.

Q. Why should you stay a mile high?
A. The view is amazing up here.

Q. Where does a Colorado mountain man keep his pigs?
A. In a hog cabin.

Q. How do you know when a ski instructor walks into the bar?
A. Don't worry, he'll tell you.

Red Hot Colorado Cookout Lovers Humor: Brought a new grill home last night. She's a real gas and she's really hot, especially after you turn her on!

Q. What is a Colorado steak pun?
A. A medium where anything well done is rare!

Colorado BBQ Pick-Up Line: You're my grill and I'm your broil.

Q. How does the Denver Police Department grill a chicken?
A. Repeatedly ask her why she crossed the road last night.

Never go hiking with a serial killer in Colorado! Just give hm free reign on the psycho path!You might be from Colrado if homemade salsa is the base of your food pyramid!You might be from Colorado if you say "The Interstate" and everybody know which one!

Q. What steps should you take if you see a mountain lion while hiking on Mt. Evans?
A. Very large ones.

Did you hear about the kidnapping on Pike's Peak? It's okay – He woke up!

Patient: I feel like I'm turning into a bear.
Shrink: How long have you felt this way?
Patient: Ever since I was a cub scout in Evergreen, Colorado.

Q. How do you avoid getting swallowed by a river while white water rafting in Colorado on your vacation?
A. Stay away from the river's mouth.

Q. What do you call it when a pothead inadvertantly eats all the chips?
A. A Snaccident.

Q. How do Colorado green chile chefs live their lives?
A. They season the day.

Patient: Doc, I think I'm a Taco Bell.
Denver Shrink: Take two bean burritos. If that doesn't clear the mental block, give me a ring.

Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in the salsa.
Waiter at Casa Bonita: Oh, don't worry. The spider in your taco will get him.

Q. How many Colorado tourists does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Five. One to hold the bulb, and four to ask for directions.

Q. What is the official flower of I25, I70, I76, C470 and US36 and through Colorado?
A. The concrete cloverleaf columbine.

Colorado Point to Ponder: With the rise of self-driving vehicles, isn't it just a matter of time before we hear a country song where the guy's truck leaves him, too?

Q. Why was a skier rushed to the ER?
A. He hurt his ski bum.

Q. How are the Denver Broncos like my meighbors? A. They can't pick up a single yard! Go Broncos!Big Ape Says: Sorry for my bluntness, that's just how I roll!Q. When is rancher like a magician? A. When he turns a cow into a pasture!

Q. How do Broncos fans describe a runaway upset at the field at Mile High?
A. A tail of whoa!

Q. Why couldn't the Broncos' fan sing at half time as scheduled?
A. He was a little hoarse.

Q. What do high country horses in Colorado see before they hear thunder?
A. A lightning colt.

Q. Why do Colorado cowboys always die with their boots on?
A. So they won't stub their toes when they kick the bucket.

Q. What diagnosis did the edible-loving Colorado pothead get from his doctor?
A. Toxic Waist!

Q. In Colorado, when is it good to have a tree in your pocket?
A. Fir when you'd just like a little nug.

Q. How can you tell blooming funny Colorado gardener jokes are bad?
A. When they're a real pain in the aster.

Q. How do you know if you're a bad Colorado gardener?
A. All the rocks in your garden went belly up!

Q. What do Colorado cowboys call cattle with a sense of humor?
A. Laughing Stock!

Q. Why was the Colorado steak a terrible gossip?
A. It wasn't juicy enough.

Q. What do Cowlorado cattle drive when the car is broken?
A. A COWasaki MOOtorcycle.

Q. After working with cow poop, how does a Colorado botanist clean her hands?
A. She gets a manure-cure.

Q. How does a cowboy get his horse to do odd jobs around the ranch? A. He pays hin under the stable!Port-o-potties say: Go Broncos! We'r number 1!Q. What's the difference between a Denver Broncos fan and a mosquito? A. Mosquitos are only annoying during the summer! Go Broncos!

Q. Why don't Colorado cattlemen get mad cow disease?
A. Because men are swine.

Q. What is a Colorado donkey with built-in GPS called?
A. A Comp-ass.

Q. Why couldn't the western rattlesnake in Colorado talk?
A. He had a frog in his throat.

Lofty Colorado Laugh of the Day: The local bank in Aspen introduced a new cash machine built in to a tree. If it's successful, they intend to expand to other branches.

Q. Why do Denver Broncos fart when they run?
A. They can't acheive full horse power without gas.

Denver Bronco Pick-Up Line: I've never made an incomplete pass, and I hope you won't be the first.

Q. How much money did the traded Denver Bronco have?
A. Just one buck. OUCH!

There's a rumor that the Denver Mint stopped making coins. Fake News! 'Cause that just doesn't make cents!

Q. Why did the blonde Broncos fan cross the road?
A. Somebody said, "Hey."

Q. How do Broncos fans explain it after the team fell to the visitors?
A. They've fallen and they can't giddy-up!

Q. What does it mean if you find a horseshoe along the High Line Canal trail?
A. It means some unfortunate Bronco is walking around barefoot.

Q. Why did the Colorado cow cross the road?
A. In an attempt to evade the cattle multilators.

| Colorado Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | Denver Puns | 2 | 3 |
| You Might Be From Colorado If... | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Colorado Tourism | Mountain Jokes | 2 | 3 |
| Colorado Music Jokes | Colorado Commuter Jokes | Colorado Fashion Puns | Colorado Bigfoot |

| Colorado Nightlife Jokes | Denver Dog Jokes | Wildlife Jokes | 2 | 3 | Donkey Puns | Horse Jokes |
| Colorado Sports Puns | Skiing Jokes | Hiking Jokes | Fishing Puns | Go Broncos! | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 |
| Colorado Craft Beer Puns | Colorado Cuisine and Munchies Jokes | Colorado Chile Pepper Puns |
| Colorado Cannabis Jokes | Mile High Denver Humor | Legal Weed Jokes | Mile High Club Jokes |
| Colorado Weather Jokes | Cool Weather Humor | 2 | Cold Winter Jokes | Colorado Come-Ons
|
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