How to really upset a dinosaur: Touchasaurus spot. - Animal Puns, Wildlie Humor, Beary Funny Jokes!

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Q. Why are
dinosaurs no
longer around

A. 'Cause their
eggs stink.


Q. Which era do pothead fossil hounds dig most? A. The Stone Age!


Q. Which
kissed butt?

A. The

Q. Which
hip hop
dinosaur got down with
a beat?

A. The


Q. Why did the
dinosaur cross
the road?

A. 'Cause there
weren't any
chickens then.


Q. What did
T-Rex use
to build a
new house?

A. A dino-saw.

Flying Dinosaur Says: Wow, it's fly day!

Jurassic Jokes, Extinct Humor, Dinosaur Puns
Dig up dino-might Pterodactyl puns, Brontosaurus LOLs, Triceratops grins and Stegosaurus jokes.

Dinosaur Jokes, T-Rex Puns, Jurassic Humor
(Because Dino Jokes and Saurus Puns Couldn't Be TOO Mainstream for Newly-Discovered Dinosaur Bone LOLs!)
Warning: Proceed Cautiously! Tyrannosaurus Ex jokes, dino humor, and Triassic laugh-o-saurus puns ahead.
| | Dinosaur Jokes and Jurassic Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Archaeology Jokes and Paleontology Puns |
| Museum Jokes | Caveman Laughs | Bigfoot Jokes | Woolly Mammoth Jokes | Reptile Humor |
| Lizard LOLs | Croc Jokes, Gator Puns | Turtle Jokes, Tortoise Puns | Smake Jokes | Bird Puns |

Q. What do
T-Rex and a
redneck have
in common?

A. Both like
their small

Q. What do you get if you cross a dinosaur and a pig? A. Jurassic Pork!

Q. Why did a Brontosaurus devour the factory?

A. Because
they were
plant eaters.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs were the comedians of the Cretaceous Period?
A. He-He-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur had a mohawk do on his head?
A. Mr. T-Rex.

Q. What is a a silent, but deadly, dinosaur fart called?
A. An ex-stinck-tion event.

Q. Which dinosaur was a real party pooper?
A. T.P. Rex.

Q. Which prehistoric animal like to tell wry jokes?
A. The dino-satire.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs kept law and order in Jurassic Park?
A. The Tricero-cops.

Dinosaur Pick-Up Line: Hey mate, let's Triassic a little tenderness.

Q. Which dinosaur species roamed the world before T-Rex?
A. Pre-Rex.

Dinosaur Hookup Line: Hi Dina, want to know more about Tyrannosaurus sex?

Q. Which dinosaur is the ancestor of modern pigs?
A. Porkosaurus-Rex

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was the ancestor of mammals?
A. Teet-Rex.

Q. What do Colorado paleontologists call it when a truck full of dinosaur bones has a wreck on the way to Denver's Natural History Museum?
A. A Jurassic Jam!

Paleontologist Chat Up Line: Hey there, are you a a pile of dinosaur bones? 'Cause I dig you.

Q. Why should you never mess with a paleontologist?
A. 'Cause you'll get Jurass kicked.

Q. Which Jurassic animal could fly with ease?
A. The dino-soar.

Jurassic Chat Up Line: Hey Dinah, I'd be a tyrannosaurus wreck if I was a dinosaur living without you in my era.

Q. What do paleontologists call a Triceratops with a stye?
A. An Eye-saur.

Q. What did the Triceratops sit on?
A. A cockroach, an ant hill, and his Tricera-bottom.

Q. What did paleontologists say when the fossilized egg they discovered blew up?
A. Dino-mite!

Q. What do they call a dinosaur fart at Denver's Museum of Nature and Science?
A. A blast from the past.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was a weightlifter?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Pecs.

Dinosaur Pick-Up Line: Hey Rex, you literally put the ass in Jurassic.

Q. Where did the Allosaurus go sight-seeing in Colorado and Utah?
A. Dinosaur National Monument.

Dinosaur Chat Up Line: Hey there big momma, you sure do put the all in Allosaurus!

Q. Which Jurassic creature subsisted on a diet of lemons?
A. The dino-sour.

Pick Up a Dinosaur Line: Yo handsome, you're at the Tricera-top of my hot hit list.

Q. What do dinosaurs put on their pizza? A. Tomato-saurus!

Q. What's a dinosaur
wearing a cowboy hat called?


Girl, if you were a dinosaur, you'd be Gorgeousaurus!

Q. Which dinosaur was the most frightening of them all?
A. The Terror-dactyl.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur always pissed everybody off?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Vex.

Q. What is the ghost of a dinosaur called?
A. A Scare-o-Dactyl.

Q. Whch kind of prehistoric animal suffered from sleep apnea?
A. The Bronchial-snore-us.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs were always being victimized by vampires?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Necks.

Jurassic Pick-Up a Dinosaur Line: Hey Rex, I would love to plesiosaur you.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur practiced voodoo?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Hex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur played NFL football?
A. The Bronco-score-us.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was afraid of the ancestors of mice?
A. Eek-Rex.

Bang Up Jurassic Pick-Up Line: Hey girl, come over to my place and I'll leave you dino-sore.

Q. Which dinosaur species cussed out all the others?
A. The Bronto-swore-us.

Jurassic Hookup Line: Hey baby, StegosaurME and StegosaurYOU should go out on a date because StegosaurUS.

Q. Where did the Supersaurus go shopping?
A. The dino-store.

Q. Which well-dressed dinosaur wore a sleeveless jacket?
A. Tyrannosaurus Vest.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur wore cowboy boots?
A. The Bronco-saurus.

Q. What did paleontologists name the the newly discovered dinosaur species that smashed everything in its path?
A. Tyrannosaurus Wrecks.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was extremely double-jointed?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Flex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs invented the game of golf?
A. Tee-Rex.

Inadequate Dinosaur Pick-Up Line: Sure babe, I'm a T-Rex and my arms are short, but guess what? I really make up for it elsewhere!

Q. What did the guy at the deli counter say to the dinosaur?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Next

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was a big flirt that never put out?
A. Tease-Rex.

Q. Which is an oppresive dinosaur leader called?
A. Tyrant-o-saurus.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur habitually tore up hardwood trees?
A. Teak-Rex.

Q. What do you call a Pterodactyl that flies off the handle when he doesn't win?
A. A saur loser.

Q. Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl using the bathroom?
A. 'Cause the Pee is silent.

Q. What do paleontologists call a group of dinosaurs vocalizing in unison?
A. A dino-chorus.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was an opera singer?
A. Mii-Mi-Mi-Rex.

Q. Why are there old dinosaur bones inthe museum?
A. 'Cause there aren't any new ones.

Q. What do paleontologists call twin dinosaurs?
A. Pair-o-dactyls.

Student: I heard there was a dinosaur that left turd trails to navigate back out of the jungle.
Paleontologist: That's poop-postoraus.

Q. Which dinosaur had the biggest vocabulary?
A. The Thesaurus.

Q. Which dinosaur was guaranteed college entrance?
A. Pre-Reqs.

Q. Which dinosaure was the best at Hide 'N Seek?
A. Camotaurus.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was always kidding around?
A. Tease-Rex.

Q. Why didn't
dinosaurs take

A. They didn't
want to be

Q. What do you call wood when it's scared? A. Petrified!

Q. Which dinosaur is
a physicist's favorite?

A. Velocity

Q. Which kind of dinosaur smelled really bad?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Reeks.

Q. Why did the dinosaur take a shower after the meteor stuck?
A. To become ex-stinked.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur had a really bad dandruff problem?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Flecks.

Q. Which dinosaur was a famous Blackjack dealer in Las Vegas?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Decks.

Horny Jurassic Hookup Line: Hey girl, do you prefer triceratops or tricerabottoms?

Q. Which kind of dinosaur suffered from incontinence?
A. Pee-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur took several naps every day?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Rest.

Q. What did paleontologists mane the newly discovered dinosaur species that was always pregnant?
A. PG-Rex.

Q. Which prehistoric beast was always counting calories?
A. The Diet-saur.

Q. Which Jurassic critter was in charge of animal poop disposal?
A. The dino-sewer.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was self-centered and selfish?
A. Me-Rex.

Q. Which dinosaur species has deep blue-green feathers?
A. Teal-Rex.

Q. What did dinosaurs near Mt. Vesuvius put on their pies?
A. Pizza saurus.

Q. How did tech savvy dinosaurs message each other?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Texts.

Q. Which dinosaur was the distant ancestor of all chickens?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Pecks.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs were religious cult leaders?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Sects.

Q. What is in the middle of every dinosaur?
A. The letter S.

Q. Which Jurassic animal kept repeating adages and idioms?
A. The dino-sayer.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur could never be kept captive in a zoo?
A. Free-Rex.

Paleontology Professor: Which dinosaur slept all day?
Student: The dino-snore-us.

Q. What do you call an old dinosaur newly elected to congress?
A. Rep Tile.

Jurassic Pick-Up Line: Yo yo baby, I'd be a Tyrannosaurus wreck if you said no to a steamy date with me.

Q. What did scientists name the newly discovered dinosaur that is thought to have been highly intelligent?
A. Thesauraus.

Q. Which dinosaurs were the first beak dancers?
A. Veloci-Rappers.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was the first creature to use cannabis?
A. Weed-Rex.

Q. What do gold diggers and paleontologists have in common?
A. Both date dinosaurs.

Q. What do you call a feninist dinosaur?
A. She-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was the most persistent and never gave up?
A. The Try-Try-Try-ceratops.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs grooved to disco music?
A. Bee Gees-Rex.

Pick Up a Paleontologist Line: Hey Rex, is that a dino bone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Q. What did dinosaurs use to power their golf carts?
A. Fossil fuels.

Dinosaur Language Pick-Up Line: Hey bae, yo-ass-issic!

Q. Which kind of dinosaur charged all of the others?
A. Fee-Rex.

q. What do you get if you cross a pig and a giraffe? A. Giraffic Pork!

Q. What do
you call a dinosaur
without smelly

A. Ex-stinked.

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. The chicken had not evolved yet!

Q. Which orange and blue dinosaur skeleton is prominately displayed at Denver Museum of Nature and Science?
A. The Bronco-saurus.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur played well with others?
A. Team-Rex.

Q. What happened when the paleontologist tripped and fell down the stairs?
A. He ended up with an ankle-saurus.

Q. How did a dinosaur feel after he was reassembled at the museum – and then woke up?
A. Puzzled.

Q. What did Tyrannosaurus call his firstborn son?
A. Wee Rex.

Q. Which species of dinosaurs populated the Baja Penninsula?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Mex.

Dino-Mighty Dinosaur Hookup Line: Bae, did you ever wonder how T-rex make babies? By having T-sex. Want to try some?

Q. Which dinosaur species liked to hang out in the meadow all day?
A. Lea-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs were the locksmiths of their day?
A. Key-Rex.

Q. Which kind of small armed dinosaur enjoyed practice shooting?
A. Skeet-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur enjoyed fishing for Kraken?
A. Sea-Rex.

Q. How did the dinosaurs pay their bills 65-million years ago?
A. With Tyrannosaurus checks.

Pick-Up a Paleontologist Line: Hey Rex, how 'bout I play find the dinosaur in your pants?

Q. Why did the Brachiosaurus have suck a long neck?
A. Because they had really stinky feet.

Q. Which dinosaur wore stiletto heels?
A. The My-feet-are-saurus.

Q. What does a dinosaur call his mate after the divorce?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Ex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was a soccer referee?
A. The Bronto-score-us.

Q. Which do you call a dinosaur whose name changed when she got married?
A. Nee-Rex.

Jurassic Period Pick-Up Line: Bae, you are dino-mite!

Q. Which dinosaur was a famous porn star back in the day?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Sex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was an apiarist?
A. Bee-Rex.

Jurassic Park Hookup Line: Yo baby, I'm going to Tyrannosaurus Wreck that ass when we get home.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was just an average student in school?
A. C-Rex.

Q. What was green and gooey, and hung from prehistoic palm trees in Jurassic Park?
A. Dinosaur snot.

Dinosaur Cuisine Point to Ponder: Why is the Paleo Diet so popular, condisering how it wotked out for the dinosaurs?

Jurassic Pick-Up Line: Hey Dina, I'd even catch a pterodactyl for you.

Paleontology Hookup Line: Let’s go back to my place so you can play with my bonersaurus.

Dig Site Chat Up Line: Hey doc, I want to be like a palaeontologist and explore your body.

Q. Which dinosaur was the branch manager?
A. Tree-Rex.

Q. Which dinosaur species thrived in any environment?
A. Teem-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was the most playful and fun-loving?
A. Whee-Rex.

Q. Which dinosaur species had the best vision?
A. See-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs never consumed coffee?
A. Tea-Rex.

Q. Which type of dinosaur was merely imaginary?
A. Dream-Rex.

Q. Which kind of dinosaur was a real hot head?
A. Steam-Rex.

Q. Where did T-Rex get all of his clothes?
A. From a dino-sewer.

Q. Which kind of dinosaurs were rated for general audiences?
A. G-Rex.

Q. Which kind of bewitching dinosaur conjured up spells?
A. Tyrannosaurus-Hex.

Q. Which type of dinosaurs were the first to celebrate Halloween?
A. Treat-Rex.

Q. What did the caveman say when he say the prehistoric bird flying high overhead?
A. Look at that dino soar!

Paleontology Come-On: Hey bae, people say I’m a diplodocus, would you like to see my diplocockus?

Q. Which of Santa's reindeers is despised by dinosaurs?
A. Comet. OUCH!

| Archaeology Jokes and Paleontology Puns | Museum Jokes , Exhibit Puns | Caveman Jokes |
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