Q. What do you call a bruin with no socks on? A. Bear foot!   PainfulPuns.com - Animal Puns, Wildlie Humor, Beary Funny Jokes!

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Q. Why do bears have fur coats? A. because they look ridiculous wearing anoraks!
Q. What does a bear call his girlfriend? A. Honey!
Q. What do you call bears without ears? A. Bs!
Q. How do you catch a fish without a fishing rod? a. with your bear hands!


Bear Jokes, Bruin Puns, Ursidae Humor
Climb on down for high koala-ty puns, bear naked humor, grizzly LOLs and Amanda panda jokes.

Koala Jokes, Bear Puns, Panda Humor
(Because Panda Envy Jokes and Un-Koala-fied Puns Could Never Be TOO Mainstream, at the Bear Minimum!)
Warning: Proceed with Caution! Gummy Bear jokes, unbearable humor, pina koala LOLs and PU Bear puns ahead.
| Bear Jokes | 2 | 3 | Panda Bear Jokes | Polar Bear Jokes | Deer Jokes | Colorado Wildlife |
| Bigfoot Jokes | Sasquatch Jokes | Colorado Bigfoot Jokes | Gorilla Jokes and Big Ape Puns |
| Buffalo and Bison Jokes | Wolf Jokes | Fox Puns | Forest Critter Puns | Animal Bar Jokes |

Q. Why aren't koalas actual bears? A. They don't meet the koala-fications!q. Why was the little bear so spoiled? A. It's mother panda'd to its every whin!Q. What do you get if you cross a skunk and a bear? A. Winnie The Pu!

Q. Why did the koala bear eat so much eucalyptus?
A. He just couldn't leaf it alone.

Q. What is a bear's favorite soft drink?
A. Koka-Koala!

Q. What did the cute Aussie bear order at the bar?
A. A Pina Koala.

Down Unda Pick-Up Line: Hey baby, you be the eucalyptus tree, and I'll wrap around you like a koala bear.

Q. Which Chinese animal spends his day wondering about the meaning of life?
A. Ponder bear.

Q. What's the zoological term for a male panda?
A. Amanda.

Q. What's black and white and yellow all over?
A. A panda with urinary incontinence.

Q. What's black and white and red all over?
A. The embarrassed panda comedian who was bamboo-ed off stage after telling Painful Puns.

Q. Why are constipated brown bears so grumpy and rude?
A. Because they just don't give a sh*t.

Bruin Point to Ponder: When a big male Grizzly poops in the woods, is the smell unbearable?

Q. What does a bruin's fart smell like in the woods?
A. It's absolutely un-bearable!

When people give you a big ol' bear hug, fart really loudly. You'll make them feel very strong!

Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. a panda with a sunburn!Q. What do you all a bear with no teeth? A. A gummy bear! q. What do you call a freezing bear? A. A bRRR!

Q. What is it called when sick bamboo bears infect their red cousins?
A. A panda-emic.

Q. What's black and white and green all over?
A. An envious panda.

Q. What is black and white a rolling down a hill at 90 MPH?
A. A panda in gray-ve peril.

Q. Why don't bruins in the woods ever look sad?
A. 'Cause whatever the situation, they just grin and bear it!

Q. Why do Grizzlies have thick fur coats?
A. If they didn't, they'd be bear naked.

Tarzan wanders into a bar followed by a bruin. Bartender asks, "What's your story?" Tarzan say, "Bear with me."

Q. How do polar bears make their beds in Alaska?
A. With snow blankets and sheets of ice!

Q. Which bear ghost haunts the Great White North?
A. The polar-geist.

Q. How do arctic bruins stay cool during summer?
A. They use bear conditioning.

Q. why don't bears like fast food? A. It's too hard to catch!Q. what's a bear's favorite beverage? A. Koka-Koala!Q. What do you get if you cross a Teddy bear and a pig? A. A Teddy Boar!

Q. If a bear could get a driver's license, which kind of car would he drivk?
A. A Furrari.

Q. What do you call a bear that's ice fishing before hibernation?
A. A brrrrrrr.

Q. What is it called when a couple of cub fall into a vat of craft beer on your deck?
A. A bear-all of laughs.

Q. What do they call the Aussie bear at the Warsaw zoo?
A. Koalaski.

Q. Why couldn't the Aussie bear join the army?
A. It was dis-koala-fied for being down unda weight.

Q. What exotic Australian mammal did the old steam ship captain keep as a pet aboard ship?
A. A coal-ala bear.

Down Unda Pick-Up Line: Hey Sheila, I have the necessary koala-fications to make you a very happy girl.

Q. What do Aussie bears do up in the trees during the afternoon?
A. They enjoy high koala-tea.

Q. How did the Star Wars Teddy bear cross the road?
A. Ewoked!

Q. What do girl Teddy bears do to make themselves look larger?
A. They wear plush-up bras.

Q. What does a Grizzly use to move rubble out of his cave entrance?
A. A wheel-bear-row.

Q. How do bruins receive packages and correspondence?
A. Via Bear Mail.


Q. What do polar bears eat for lunch? A. Ice burgers!Q. How do you hire a bear? A. Put him on stilts! Q. What do you call a bear that jumps but never lands? A. Peter Panda!

Q. What is an Alaskan polar bear's favorite summer dessert?
A. Eskimo pie..

Q. What is one of the biggest drawbacks of a polar bear's diet?
A. Brain freeze.

Q. What does a crude polar bear do after he eats a big meal?
A. He brrr-ps.

Q. Why was the bruin fired from yet another job?
A. 'Cause he only did the bear minimum.

Q. What do bears eat at picnics?
A. Blue bear-y pie.

Q. What kind of embrace can you expect from a Grizzly?
A. A big bear hug.

Q. Which giant bamboo eater is always out of breath?
A. The pant-a bear.

Q. When did the black and white bear's husband realize the wedding was a big mistake?
A. After he opened Panda Dora's box.

Q. What did the panda say when he was forced out of his natural habitat?
A. This is un-BEAR-able.

Q. What goes black, white, black, white, black? A. A panda rolling down ahill! Smokey The Bear Says: Happy Fire Day!Q. How do you apologize to a bruin? A. Bear your heart and soul!

Q. Why are pandas the least racist animals?
A. 'Cause they're black, white, and Asian.

Q. What does a panda say when it steps out for a bit?
A. I'll be white black...

Q. What's black and white and blue all over?
A. A sad panda.

Q. What do you call a Chinese bear swimming in a small lake?
A. Pond-a.

Q. Why do she bears in the Rocky Mountains have fur coats?
A. Because the Brazilian hasn't caught on down there yet.

Old bears never die, but they do go into a final hibernation.

Q. Where do sleepy Aussie bears like to vacation on the US West Coast?
A. Napa Valley, Koala-fornia.

Q. What is a brown bruin's favorite kind of fruit?
A. Bear-ries.

Q. When do bruin couples stop arguing?
A. When it becomes un-bear-able, or it's time to hibernate.

Q. Why shouldn't you tell an earthquake joke to a polar bear you just met?
A. Because that's a really bad ice breaker.

Q. What did the koala write to his lady on Valentine's Day?
A. I love You, Calyptus!

Q. How do you say "I'm sorry" in Australian?
A. I koalagise.

| Bear Jokes | 2 | 3 | Panda Puns | Polar Bear Jokes | Deer Jokes | 2 | Buffalo and Bison Jokes | 2 |
| Wolf Jokes | 2 | 3 | Fox Puns | Mouse Jokes, Rat Puns | Rabbit Jokes, Hare Puns | Yak Jokes | 2 |
| Forest Critter Puns | Bat Jokes | Owl Jokes, Owl-ful Puns | Animal Poop Puns | Sea Mammals |
| Gorilla Jokes, Big Ape Puns | 2 | 3 | Bigfoot Jokes | Sasquatch Jokes | Colorado Bigfoot Jokes |
| Chimpanzee Puns | Monkey Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | Stoner Monkeys | Animal Potheads | Animal Bar |
| Elephant Jokes | Lion Jokes, Big Cat Puns | African Safari Animal Jokes | Kangaroo Jokes |
| Insect Jokes, Bug Puns, Entomology LOLs | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Bee Jokes, Hive Humor, Wasp LOLs | 2 |
| Butterfly Jokes, Moth Puns, Caterpillar LOLs | Housefly Jokes | Spider Jokes, Arachnid Puns | 2 |
| Frog Jokes and Toad Puns | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | Snake Humor | 2 | 3 | Dinosaur Jokes | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
| Lizard Laughs | Crocodile Jokes, Gator Puns | Turtle Jokes, Tortoise Puns | 2 | 3 | Reptile Humor |
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| Duck Puns | Goose Jokes | Fish Jokes | Finny Fish Puns | Sports Animal Jokes | Bronco Puns |
| Wild Animal Jokes | Colorado Wildlife | Farm Animals | Pet Animal Puns | Animal Crime Jokes |

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